DS plans to walk 32 miles on his own this weekend.

[Interestingmauve]

He's in his first couple of weeks at University. Seems to be really enjoying the course, but not socialising at all. This is not any great surprise, as he's a real introvert and happy in his own company. All his life he's tended to have one good friend rather than a group, although these have changed from time to time.

Hiking is his thing and he likes to do it alone. However, a day walk would usually be about 14 miles.

I'm worried. I don't suppose I can stop him and I won't know if he goes or not if he doesn't tell me, but 32 miles without proper training (above 14m) on his own where he doesn't know the area and has no one nearby he could call for help and the nights drawing in?

On the one hand, great that he's getting out, but....

Me too. You could walk Huddersfield to Oldham which is about 17 miles across Marsden Moor.
Rough terrain for sure, and not urban roads, but not beyond an experienced hiker.

Make sure you can track him.
Get a plan with timings on and get him to send you a copy.
Get him to download what 3 words app

It's very doable, the Keswick to Barrow walk is an event that happens every year, I think that's 43 miles and I know of 12 year olds who have completed. So long as he sets off at sunrise and takes back up chargers and kit in case of an emergency he'll be fine.

My husband walked the length of the Chesterfield canal. 32 miles in one day then I joined him for the remaining 16 the next day. People sometimes walk it in one go.

He's only going to another town, he can get the bus/a taxi back if he wants to.

I'm 53, a few weeks ago I went for a walk intending to only go about 3 miles around a nearby lake (walking there from home) but I'm terrible for 'seeing where this track goes'. 😂. By the time I got onto the main road back it was 12 miles (14 by the time I got home). I could easily have done the additional 2. These days I'd choose to get the bus/taxi home, but as little as 5 years ago I'd have happily walked back.

he's not scaling Everest FFS

I get why you are worried, it is a long hike but it sounds like he kind of knows what he’s doing.

There are several Facebook groups (I know Facebook is probably no longer cool) where people find others to hike with, maybe he would be interested in meeting people that way?.

As for the socialising thing, my dd has just started uni and is similar, she’s not very sociable, the first few days she tried hard to attend activities and groups but then kind of gave up, she spends a lot of time on her own in her room but she’s happy with that. I think sometimes we just worry too much, we want them to have fun and be sociable but they are not us. As long as he’s happy I wouldn’t worry. He will probably find his people in time and if he finds hiking good for his mental health then it’s great that he’s continuing to do it when away from home.

What a fantastic challenge - well done on him. I imagine he's less likely to tell you what he's doing or what his route is because he knows you'll be fretting (as you are). If you relax and encourage him to behave responsibly and take the correct gear and cover all eventualities, you may find he'll confide in you more.

Also his phone is likely to have maths/pathfinder apps on it.

I haven't read all your posts OP but have you mentioned AS or is your son perhaps diagnosed with HFA?

Most universities now have societies for people with ASCs, as so much student life hinges upon socialising in busy noisy environments, with a lot of face-to-face communication with near-strangers. This is torment for neuroatypical people and a lot of them do tend to retreat. A specialist club may do hiking, running, cinema trips etc. They also help students with networking and employment. I do think a 32 mile hike in autumn alone does sound a bit risky, he would be better accompanied.

Have you ever walked 32 miles? Soldiers aren't generally expected to cover more than 20 in a day.It is a mammoth walk.

42,000 people just RAN 25 miles in London. You're getting this out of proportion.

Very long distance hiker here.
32 miles in one day is a long hike but not unmanageable. However, as he's only done 14 miles previously it's a big step up, which could potentially be too far. I would suggest you ask him what get out plans he has if he finds it is a bit too far or the weather turns. If he's walking 16 miles to another city and back then he should assess how fit he feels when he arrives in the other city and if he's unsure he should get public transport back.

I have always had this wanderlust. I've been long distance trekking for 20 years since my early twenties. I can't stop it - I have to do it. I struggle to cope if I'm not able to do long multi-day treks regularly. I think I caused my Mam to worry when I first started doing it but she soon realized that I had everything under control, that there was nothing she could do to stop it and she accepted it. He does need plans for emergencies though - I have always been very careful about planning like that. And he also needs to make sure he can assess his own abilities each day he hikes - some days I can walk miles and miles with no problems - and other days are just a struggle. So I need to be able to work out during the hike what distance is safe and at what point I should put a get out plan into action.

If your DS is going to turn out like me and NEED these long hikes, then I think you will have to get used to it. Maybe talk to him about what his safety plans are - pointing out you don't want to stop him doing it but that he needs to take responsibility for this. And also that if he is going to be doing this regularly he needs to save up for and buy proper equipment - waterproofs and decent quality boots suitable for the terrain he is walking on.

It depends where he is planning to walk

32 miles is a long way, and more than double what her son has walked previously

Mobile phones don't always work in the hills

It's getting colder

OP - you are sensible to be concerned. As an aside, you seem quite concerned about his introverted nature. Is he happy? If so, I'd advise you to accept him as he is, rather than try to change him

I am a coastal hiker and walk mainly on my own. 15 miles is my limit normally though especially in winter but that usually involves a lot of ascent/descent and I am in my 60s so a lot older than your son.

As others have said maybe get a route and an expected finish time from him and make sure he takes his phone and battery pack in case he needs to call emergency services. He will be fine but hopefully he has remembered it gets dark earlier and takes torch or has plan to cut walk short if needed.

www.britishwalks.org/walks/2004/589.php

This website might reassure you if you plug in where he is off to. A friend does this walk to work and back again. Not the same distance but reasonably well travelled.

It's the first few weeks and it's still mild. It would be nice if he had company but it will also give him something to talk about if he joins the uni society

As an experienced hiker he’ll know the rules and will tell you where he’s going. Just ask him to text you a couple of times. I think it sounds fun.

He’ll be fine, I did that distance for a charity walk without any training when I was at uni, was massively tiring but at that age you bounce straight back.

42,000 people just RAN 25 miles in London. You're getting this out of proportion.

I really don't think this comment is relevant. These marathon runners have been training for several weeks, and they are much much fitter than most people. I walk regularly, but not 32 miles.

The best advice on here is from posters who actually walk this kind of distance

I think he's a bit of an idiot if he thinks he can just walk 32 miles with no training when the most he normally walks is 14. But he won't die, he will just be very tired and sore and likely have to give up if he cant manage.

Contrary to popular MN belief I think its natural to be worried, he's 18 and he's just moved out of home and hasn't made many friends. If any of my family members told me they planned to do a sudden 32 mile walk without much planning or training I'd be concerned. It is a very big walk, and whilst doable with training, it's a massive step up from 14. Most 18yr olds could do 14 with little to no prep, if they forgot their lunch, if they ran out of water etc.

What is the terrain like? Is it undulating farmland or steep hillsides? That makes a difference. 32 miles on a canal towpath = dead easy, 32 miles on the lakeland fells = hard.

Most 18 year olds with a little bit of walking experience could manage a undulating track of that length without many problems. The sandstone trail is almost exactly that length and loads of people walk it as a single day hike every day of the year.

The only issue would be if he fell and injured himself.

I would encourage him to take the kit he'd need to keep himself ok if he ran into problems. Perhaps if you are able you could fund it for him?

If he isn't sure what that is, the mandatory kit list for any ultra race would do it. If you look at this page, it has a kit list with an explanation for each bit of kit and a good little video of how to pack it all into a small dry bag so it will easily fit in a rucksack.

It's so hard. My son has just started uni too. You don't stop worrying despite mn belief x

Exactly @Airymanning.

DD graduated this year, and has just started a new job in her university city, but she is still my daughter and I still worry about her.

The best advice on here is from posters who actually walk this kind of distance

So I do walk those distances and among other routes have completed 3 Peak Challenges which is 5000ft climb as well as 28 miles+. I’m a middle aged woman and fairly fit but am no elite athlete. What I can tell you is there are TONS of people doing that who have done little to no training and just rock up for the day to give it a go - 300k people a year in fact. The difference is how much its gonna hurt on the day and how quick their recovery is.

If he walks regularly, has the fitness of an 18 year old, can do 14 miles and is motivated to do it - I’d say his chances of completing are very very high. The variables will be weather and terrain but since you haven’t told us we can’t advise. His legs will be heavy by the end and quite likely have blisters if he doesn’t stop to sort hot spots but everyone can go much further than they think they can.

I’ve walked all over the UK and have rarely not had a mobile signal and certainly not for 32 miles. We taking someone walking between 2 cities so this is not a black out zone.

As I and several others who hike have said, take the right kit and he will be absolutely fine. Just because some people call mountain rescue does not make hiking dangerous.

Uber?? Or a regular taxi company. Or look up the bus timetable & routes.

Honestly I would have walked that far without a phone in the big bad city in the 1980s. I didn't know it was scary.

You might already know this but you can register your mobile with the emergency services so you can text 999 if your signal is poor
firstaidtrainingcooperative.co.uk/can-i-text-999/#:~:text=How%20to%20register%20your%20phone,wasn't%20sent%20by%20mistake.

Also remember that if you need to call 999 from a mobile it will use any available network. But there does need to be a network available

Uber?? Or a regular taxi company. Or look up the bus timetable & routes.

Ha ha. You wouldn't get an Uber out to you at the top of Woodhead Pass. We can't even get Ubers round here 5 miles from town.