I almost died in the stupidest way

[Chloefairydust]

So I woke up with the worst of sore throats, and I’m the kind of person who when I come down with a cold, it literally drags on for weeks and weeks and normally leads to a chest infection.

That is until I discovered the gross but effective cure of raw garlic. I read somewhere that if you swallow a small whole raw small garlic clove with a glass of water that it cures the common cold. It actually does work as well. I have been doing this for the past couple of years.

Until this morning, and somehow this garlic clove was just the right shape to get lodged in my throat. I couldn’t breathe or swallow or make a sound. I was home alone and sooo frightened. Somehow I managed to hit my own chest with my head facing down and spat out the offending garlic. So I almost died in the stupidest of ways….

I think now on I’m going to chop the garlic into tiny pieces to cure a cold.

But thought I would warn people who might be as stupid as me not to kill yourself with garlic 🧄

If you have had a near death experience in a similarly stupid way please share to make me feel less of an idiot?

@BigSandyBalls2015

Yes, I had a headache for the four days I was positive. Then day four I was positive in the morning and negative in the afternoon. Back to normal by day five but not feeling like doing a 10k until the following week!

I've done this.

It's surprisingly easy.

Taking yourself out of the gene pool by jumping into the swimming pool, eh?

Two birds, one stone LOL!

Probably getting his revenge.

@Marmunia1066 have you posted on wrong thread?

Just made me LOL & I wasn't even there!

@Wheredoallthepensgo

No, I'm answering a question asked by a previous poster.

Not a near death one but funny 'WTF'

I was on holiday in Spain with my parents, aged about 9. My nana lived with us so we all shared a family room.

One night after nana & I went to bed, mum & dad stupidly played a drinking game with the waiters - shots of local brandy. Waiters were cheating & not downing the shots. It didn't go well & my folks were leathered.

Dad woke in the middle of the night feeling...ill. He decide to take some 'plink, plink, fizz' Alka Seltzer. There was no bottled water. Knowing he shouldn't drink from the tap, he just popped them in his mouth. He started frothing like a rabid dog, running round the room trying to find something to drink. Nana wakes up & starts panicking thinking he's having a fit, mum is crying and I was in hysterics laughing. He finally made it to the bathroom to throw up.

They didn't take waiters on again.

I can confirm that it's more of a challenge than you'd think.

I recently took a rubber ring on holiday to do some gentle hydro exercises in the pool after a hip replacement. This required me to lie on the surface and put the ring on my foot while trying to summon the strength from my puny post-surgery limbs to push the ring down to the bottom of the pool so I could stand up.

This involved a lot of spluttering and head sinking under the water until control was achieved. Unfortunately the restaurant overlooked the pool and the hotel closed the curtains one morning as the sight of me flailing was clearly too much for guests having breakfast a few metres away. I suspect they thought it was a really odd way to learn to swim.

Fucking hell I was holding it together throughout this comment (barely) then it got to the umbrella hahaha

@mam0918 I don't know what she was doing or why her mouth was open 😂😂

I was flying a kite when the wind changed direction suddenly - the kite divebombed me, the pointy bit whacked me on the head and knocked me out. I have had a phobia about kites ever since.

@iklboo - I can just picture it, pmsl.

How do you start the car whilst getting in it?! Surely you need to be in and seated to do this?

this story was very funny 😂

@iklboo omg thank you for sharing! This is so funny!

@OldFan this is why asthmatics should not smoke @Chloefairydust @MrsMacIsBack

I can't remember it because I was so young, but my mum told me a few times that when I was 2 years old I was crying and she thought it was because I was hungry so she put a murray mint in my mouth (I assume that was the only food that she had to hand). I nearly choked to death apparently!

@Blowthemandown well yeah, obviously. This was 20 years ago. I gave up smoking 18 years ago.

That was the only time I ever ended up on a ventilator, so I think it was definitely something to do with the washing powder.

This is why no one should smoke washing powder. Well, no one should smoke really.

You should have put them through again on a rinse cycle!

Seriously, my sister ended up hospitalised with asthma after being exposed to a chemical leak at work. She said it was terrifying, she thought she was going to die. So you have my sympathy.

@OldFan 😂

I fell off my lovely new road bike...I was riding along happily when a bit of twig got caught under the front mudguard.For reasons I don't understand now instead of stopping and pulling it out I reached over while riding,managed to jam the front wheel and went right over the handlebars.
Only it was my lovely new bike so I hung onto it,did a complete somersault still hanging on and landed on it - I had bike frame shaped bruises all down my front for weeks
It's a shame really,as in another world it could have been one of those amazing Olympic BMX stunts 😂

As the armband of death survivor, I would just like to point out that I was a child at the time. My adult body weight is distributed differently so I might be ok. I'm not going to repeat the experiment to find out though.

On another note, I don't understand how so many people can run themselves over. Surely a car won't move unless someone's touching the accelerator or it's rolling down a hill because the handbrake's off. And if the latter then how do you have time to get out of the car before it starts rolling? I just can't picture what's happening here. Is it a feature of automatic cars or something (I've never driven an automatic and have only a very sketchy idea of how they work)?

I just wanted to say that whomever told you about not giving your daughter antibiotics for tonsillitis was spot on. I had chronic tonsillitis in my early teens, right through to early 20s, when I finally convinced a surgeon to get rid of them. I had become antibiotic resistant and a very real risk of developing sepsis pretty much every time I had an infection (which by that stage was every four weeks at minimum). The reason they took the tonsils out eventually is because I did develop sepsis and would have died if they didn't do the surgery. So, not giving your daughter antibiotics as a matter of course is a very GOOD thing, so that they can save them for when she's really ill. For her sake and yours, I really hope she grows out of it. Most kids do. All the best to you!

I went to the Glass Bienale in Stourbrisge a few years ago and there was a stall selling Kissable Garlic. It was gorgeous and their claims were a curate - no smelly breath! All the lovely garlicky tast but non of the burn. They had it in all sorts of oils and dressings and gave out samples, leading to us spending far too much dosh on garlic that we ate straight from the pots on the way home. It was a new business I think, but they talked about getting their product into a few delis. I haven't seen them since though, which is a shame.

To all those people choking on food, have you ever thought of chewing first lol!