I almost died in the stupidest way

[Chloefairydust]

So I woke up with the worst of sore throats, and I’m the kind of person who when I come down with a cold, it literally drags on for weeks and weeks and normally leads to a chest infection.

That is until I discovered the gross but effective cure of raw garlic. I read somewhere that if you swallow a small whole raw small garlic clove with a glass of water that it cures the common cold. It actually does work as well. I have been doing this for the past couple of years.

Until this morning, and somehow this garlic clove was just the right shape to get lodged in my throat. I couldn’t breathe or swallow or make a sound. I was home alone and sooo frightened. Somehow I managed to hit my own chest with my head facing down and spat out the offending garlic. So I almost died in the stupidest of ways….

I think now on I’m going to chop the garlic into tiny pieces to cure a cold.

But thought I would warn people who might be as stupid as me not to kill yourself with garlic 🧄

If you have had a near death experience in a similarly stupid way please share to make me feel less of an idiot?

I also managed to shut my own head in the car door as was rushing to get to an appointment.

I was very nearly ran over by a car.

I was sat on a kerb minding my own business outside a neighbours house.

He got in his car and started to reverse out of his drive. When he got to me, instead of standing up and moving out of the way, I laid down!!!

He was halfway over me before another neighbour spotted me and came rushing out. I was so bloody lucky. He was doing a straight reverse and didn’t have time to turn his wheels before he got stopped.

I was covered in scrapes and bruises and I was terrified, but I was ok.

I think I scared about 50 years off the poor bloke though

Reading this chuckling to myself while sucking a strespil. I think you can all see where this is going...

Yes I started choking on it and all I could think of was if I died someone would take a look at my phone and think I was taking part in some sort of strange middle age tik tok challenge!!

A comment above you sounds like the person who fell down the man hole 😂

allium-sativum (garlic) is well researched and used in multiple medical treatments.

@Octopuscrazy nah that doesn't count anywhere near "nearly dying". You just bumped your head. Softy.

We got blitzed bad in the war but are rural (germans got lost looking for the city in a storm and unloaded everything on our villages instead) so farmers and people doing their garden regularly dig them up, its super common... the police probably dont think anything of it.

I was saying the other day how I never get stung by insects, I like to think its good management of not screaming and flailing but I wonder if there is another reason why?

They have proven some people attract mosquitos more so I wonder about bees/wasps etc... I definately do eat a lot of garlic so maybe that (actually havent been bitten by mosquitos in my adult life either but did attract them as a child).

Bliddy hell - terrible yet hilarious!

(And a conversation with our fathers that none of us would want to have.)

Radiant heat, not direct heat like you get from a hob.

Why where you sitting on kerb, let along lying on it?

I have one! Not me but my dad

for some reason I can’t remember he was trying to get a single mattress up in the loft (tall ceiling Victorian house with normal ladder up to loft hatch). So he thought he’d fold it to fit it through the hatch…

yep you guessed it, he’s almost though the hole with the folded mattress when it sprang open, knocked him off the ladder and onto the floor. He grabbed the ladder as he fell and it landed on top of him. Good job it didn’t hit his head! Even at the time it was equal parts horrifying and hilarious!!

Bigoldmachine that’s reminded me of another incident. Replaced doors and DH left 2 doors in the kitchen, leaning against the wall. I asked him to move them due to twins being 7/8 yrs old and friends coming into to house. He said it’s not a problem.

I went to the utility room and as I opened that door the 2 doors fell forwards and landed on my back, just below my neck.

All this thread has made me want to do is stick some arm bands on my ankles and see if I actually do get stuck. I can’t be the only one thinking ‘I reckon I could overpower them’ 😂

Yes you are! If you must, then please tell the lifeguard beforehand.
Have you written a Will?

My dad fell off the roof while fiddling with the arial more than once... you would think he would learn not to go up there in his slippers but nope he made the same mistake MULTIPLE times.

Luckily he alway landed feet first and our roof went down over the second story so only a 1 story drop but it does feel slightly darwin-y that he kept doing the same stupid thing.

The thought had crossed my mind too 😂

@mam0918

Adjusting the TV aerial on the roof was how Rod Hull died. Although I sometimes think Emu may have had a hand in it.
Which would be ironic considering that what Rod did to Emu!

Cos I clearly was a bit of an idiot.

I was young and I lived down an avenue at the time so cars weren’t common.

Thanks for the videos @Choconuttolata very helpful!! 👏👏

Someone I used to work with was cutting her thorn hedge. And a bloody thorn got lodged in her throat! She survived but she thought it was the end!

Was she cutting it by nibbling it with her teeth?

Thank good ness you lived to tell the tale!

im
forever falling down or up the stairs because I’m trying to carry too many things at once. That’s standard though isn’t it?!

I’m surprised by how common it seems to run your self over with your own car 😮

🤣🤣🤣