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Teen daughter is a nightmare

130 replies

Adventurine · 25/09/2022 13:36

As I write this, she's stomping down the stairs, roughly a month worth of laundry in her arms, scowling her head off.

She was told she has to sort out her absolute pit of a room. They (she and her brother) said they weren't babies, didn't need telling, etc, wanted to decide for themselves when to tidy "OUR spaces." Oh, ok. Right. So we compromised and they were given the option of choosing to listen to our prompts to do a quick tidy of their rooms on a Friday, bringing their laundry down and just staying on top of it all, or they would have to sort out the chaos they created on the last weekend of the month and we would revert back to them being told when their rooms were to be tidied. Guess what DD chose?

Her room is the worst I've ever seen it, and DD is a very messy teen anyway. So, today came. She chose to do none of it yesterday, meaning she has to do it all today. Jesus bloody christ. You would think she was being asked to remove her own kidney. She started sending me abusive texts about how I never listen to what she wants etc. So I took her phone and said she could tidy it up without the texting. Then she spent an hour screaming about her friends and they have plans etc. i told her I would tell her friends she was not coming out until her room was sorted out. Screaming, crying, kicking the door and what sounds like flinging everything off her shelves in a rage. Then raging at her brother because he chose to do the ten minutes on a Friday (he's generally tidier anyway), calling him terrible names, demanding he help her because he doesn't have any tidying to do. He went out to play football and she lost her damn mind screaming out of the window at him that she would never forget his refusal to help her.

On and on and on it went, raging at the top of her voice about what nasty parents she has, how she can't wait to turn 16 and move out.

How long are they absolute beasts for?

OP posts:
MALJA · 27/09/2022 18:50

I was a messy cow when I was a teenager & my room drove my mum absolutely nuts but I couldn’t understand at that time why it bothered her as ‘she didn’t have to go in’ was my answer - now as a busy mum myself I absolutely get it but some teens hormones/stubbornness/immaturity just won’t get it.

In the end all you’re doing is stressing yourself out by the arguing & dare I say ‘nagging’ - I love some of the suggestions other people have made i.e don’t wash her clothes & make her do it herself - as a teenager that deffo would have changed my attitude as no way would I have wanted to walk round in dirty clothes!

Good luck!

insidenumber9 · 27/09/2022 18:51

ResplendentQuetzal · 25/09/2022 14:26

Yep this, you have to have a very thick skin to deal with teens, teen girls are beastly

Not mine. Nor her close friends. Moan about your troublesome teens and you'll have my sympathy but don't accuse all teen girls of behaving badly.

There’s always one! 🙄

GetItOffYourChest · 27/09/2022 19:03

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Adventurine · 27/09/2022 19:06

Don't get me wrong, my husband can be messy, and he won't see a damn thing that needs doing unless you drag him to it with flashing lights and sirens blaring, which drives me mad at times, but he's not even a patch on DD!

OP posts:
SunscreenCentral · 27/09/2022 19:44

I just close the door to their rooms.

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