Being poor is...

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Money being the last thing you think of at night and first thing when you wake up.
Dreading party invites in school bags.
Wrapping the baby in blankets because it's cold but too early to justify the heating.
Feel free to add your own

It’s a time and energy sink. Everything takes so much longer and so much more energy to do.

being sick takes longer to recover because you can afford the things that relieve the symptoms or the right food that keeps you healthier or the heat to warm you up so you can rest well.

the upside to it all, despite all the hardness of it, that you don’t really see until you have the space to see it, just how capable you actually are. That you can mend socks and clothes and shoes to within an inch of their life and you’re good at it so no one notices. That all that sad veg in the fridge you can turn into a feast. That you’re not really beholden like everyone else to the levels of consumption you see with well off friends, that labels really no longer hold any power and and as long as you’re warm, fed and the house is nice you couldn’t give a fuck. Just wish I didn’t spend over a decade in poverty to get to that point but I’ll take that.

Absolutely soul destroying.

I remember being really poor as a child, never enough food, hand me downs, my sister wore the same clothes I wore, I ended up with my brothers clothes. Being cold, it was always cold, never enough money for anything. My mum worked 3 jobs my dad worked 2! It was hard for them. Never have a TV

Now I worry all the time, I don’t eat so dh & the kids do, no money spare every penny is accounted for, we live rurally and I don’t have enough diesel to get the kids to school till payday - I will end up having to bounce money off my bank account which won’t help as I still won’t have the money it’s and endless cycle.

Everything is hard work, we have £££ debt and the repayments are killing us but have got into debt trying to subsidise the cost of living…endless circle. Kids now longer go to clubs, no swimming, karate, scouts or guides etc. No tutor to help catch my kids up at school so they are falling further and further behind! I can’t even afford loo roll and we are nearly out. Food is so expensive, can’t get free school meals (or any other help as we earn over the threshold) so kids have lunch boxes as they were cheaper but now I don’t think they are. Same meals on repeat not sure I can even afford the electric to put the oven on now.

I don’t have much left to sell or get rid off apart from our iPads which the kids need to use for homework.

Endless cycle of shit really.

dreading weaning my baby as I could barely afford food for me let alone her

this is what I am struggling with at the moment. When he was BF it was free and now I'm having to feed an extra person who wastes so much (obviously he can't help it being a baby). Fortunately my DD gets a hot dinner every day at school.

Reading all of this and I'm now realising that the reason my dad refuses to ever get rid of something until he has the replacement in his hand/sometimes eats just 1 banana in the day time all day, and the reason my mum buys clothes non stop now she earns good money, is because of their experiences as very poor children whose main (and often only) meal was the FSM they got at school.

Oh god, absolutely this. It's awful when I realise I have to put something back.

I'm sorry, that's so difficult.

Although hard, poverty is more manageable for myself and DP. It is not having enough for the kids that is harder.

I do remember when ''Poverty/Suffering' books were hugely popular.
''A child called it'' began the genre, I think?
Many others suffered, their voices unheard and unwritten.

I remember the above mentioned book in 1988.

That's right, a book called, 'We need to talk about Kevin' was of the same genre.

A Child Called It was about abuse.

My son got sent home Ill from school recently and we used the last of the calpol. I had to ask my disabled mum to borrow the money to buy some more. When Dh went to the chemist they only had the giant bottle of branded Calpol and it was £8.50. My heart actually sunk.

I live in my overdraft aswell, the day after payday. I've been trying to pay it off £10 a month. What happens if they do call it in and you don't have the money? It's just over £1000 but literally might aswell be a million.

Cheap pasta or value beans on toast for tea every fucking day. One proper meal a day.
Hiding when the doorbell rings or when the phone rings cos who have I forgot (ie can't afford) to pay this time.
Being cold.

It's taken me years to get over the post (and the related panic around it).
Definitely taken a knife to the bottom of the sofa to find change before too.
Pampas adverts used to make me cry (The difference between the happy smiling mother and baby on tv and our poverty stricken life was stark).

I'd love to hear every single post in this thread read out in Parliament. The Parliament of the 5th wealthiest nation in the world. It's devastating.

The post I still have a phobia about-
especially envelopes with windows in.
now its emails I’m worried about.

We need to talk about Kevin is about a child who is violent and what he then goes on to do. And about his mother’s relationship with him. I don’t remember them being poor but I may be wrong.

Thank you for your kindness. Things are so much better now. We struggled for years but I retrained and made my way up the ladder, met and married the most amazing man and we are all so happy x

I swear there are rainbows waiting for those who don’t give up. It’s hard looking back but my daughter is amazing and doing so well- she really understands life now and how to give to others.

In my case, having to live somewhere you hate in a tiny house on a giant housing estate, no personal space, constant noise, a sense of fear and suffocation, a permanent state of fight or flight, people on top of you, idiots racing round in noisy cars, and benefit cheating vermin as neighbours (mixed in with some of the loveliest people in the world, btw, who deserve better).

Poverty is having no options. It’s being trapped around people who belong in a zoo. It’s spending your life on anti-depressants, not because you are depressed but because you want something to numb you. It’s living somewhere you hate so much that you prefer winter because you can’t see it and because your neighbours stay indoors.

(And before some tedious lefty accuses me of snobbery, let me stress that the loveliest people I ever met also lived on that awful estate.)

I'm sorry to everyone going through the gruelling grind of poverty. I hate that we tolerate such inequality in the UK.

Just mentioning this in case it helps anyone - in Scotland, Wales and NI (and in some places in England - worth checking with your pharmacy) everyday OTC medicines for children eg Calpol can be got free through the Minor Ailment Scheme. www.boots.com/prescriptions--1/nhs-services/minorailments

Being poor is...
something that should not be happening to people in this country in the 21st century.

This government has absolutely no interest in making decisions and taking action that could make a real positive difference because it cares more about the wealth of vested interests of (investors, businesses, landlords etc) than it does the lives of ordinary people.

You remember correctly.

We Need to Talk about Kevin is about a wealthy American woman and her son, who despite having a middle class and privileged upbringing, becomes a school shooter.

Not being able to afford to buy the biscuits need for a support group I ran for vulnerable parents... oh the irony.

Poverty in the UK - child poverty in particular - is a political choice by the Tory government. There is absolutely no other reason why anyone in this country should go hungry.

Having gone through poverty and homelessness because of my own stupidity I am now terrified of going back. I have to justify everything. I can’t just shop. I have to have food in just in case. The fear, embarrassment etc is always at the back of your mind. But I also love the fact I can now offer food and shelter to those in need - nowt fancy just a sofa bed - of an escape route.

Poverty is expensive (debt is expensive when you have no assets; can't bulk buy or batch cook when you have one shelf in a shared fridge and no cooking facilities; can't shop around for cheaper utilities etc when you're in a shared house)