You’re designing a hotel. What do you put in

[IHopeYouStepOnALegPiece]

Not a super high end, bougie, oxygen bar and a personal chef style hotel.

just your standard, premier inn + style.

mine is plug points near the fucking bed.

I’m currently hanging off the edge of the bed on an attempt to chill and do some work 🙃

Oo oo, ideally one of the wheelchair accessible rooms would include a proper wetroom with a hoist! Not something I need (the standard hotel wetrooms with the shower seat is ideal for me) but lots of people do and they just don't exist in most hotels

drawers! I just want to lift everything out of my case into a drawer and more than 4 coat hangers

Decent reading lights!

Doors that don’t slam shut!!

I have no idea how people sleep well in hotels. Almost every hotel I stay in, I spend the whole evening/morning being jolted awake by doors along the corridor being slammed shut.

Are you sitting on the bed using a laptop? Wouldn't a better solution be a chair or stool so that you can work at the desk where the power points are?

Hooks for towels/bathrobes etc in the bathroom.

I think people who design/decorate hotel rooms should have to live in them for a month

No, on my phone. Technically yes that would be better but I ate too much lunch and want a lay down 😁

Plug point near a bed and near dressing table mirror, also with usb points - and one that isn't a fucking weird lamp only fitting so you can't even take it out to plug your straighteners in and the travel plug doesn't fit it anyway.

Windows that open, blinds/curtains that close properly, good temperature control - aircon, heating, fan etc - depending on where located.

Comfy bed, with extra blanket/duvet/pillows if necessary instead of 4 manky scatter cushions which we know hardly ever get cleaned.

Clean bathroom, which does not mean cleaning it with the previous occupant's towels. A good shower, goes without saying. Big fuck off fluffy towels, not a teatowel for my shower, and if there are two people staying, yes we do unsurprisingly want one each. A wall between the bathroom and bedroom, not venetian blinds that don't shut properly. And a standard sized shower cubicle, please, not one made for a wendy house.

Housekeeping - yes please. No, I don't want to have to go and ask at reception for my room to be cleaned every few days, Premier Inn. Nor do I wish to be turfed out of the room in the morning by the cleaners - there is a happy medium!

Lighting - yes please. I'm trying to put on make-up, not carefully curate a 11th century illuminated manuscript (though age brings some similarities).

A mini fridge in the room. Many people need insulin these days and also like fresh milk in their tea and coffee. A reasonably priced mini bar/snacks would be good and also a couple of complimentary cookies.

Clothes storage - as a minimum one wardrobe with removable hangers - several - and a couple of drawers.

Breakfast. A flat white from a bean to cup machine please, not filter coffee apparently made from garden soil, or so weak that I'm not sure if it's meant to be tea instead. France/Belgium: I don't want faff around to boiling my own eggs. Just hard boil them and stick them in a bowl, ok?
Don't have your toasting machine set to warm the bread on the first pass and cremate it on the second. Tomatoes: cook them properly or don't bother. I don't want two half blazing hot billiard balls. Also many people like Marmite or peanut butter with their toast instead of jam. Avocado would also be a nice option.

Any hotel that has a pool should have some place to hang wet swimsuits besides the curtain rod of the shower. You just end up with a wet bathroom floor. A completely separate area is ideal, but a hanging system inside the shower works.

accessible outlets in convenient locations, preferably at table height

nightstands on both sides of the bed

a usb outlet on the tv in an easy to reach spot .

having the TV set up already for easy log ins to common streaming services so you don’t need to bring a device that lets you do that.

Plugs next to the bed
Large mugs and loads of Earl grey tea bags
Wine glasses and decent sized glasses.
Magnifying mirror which is well lit.
Two towels each. I like a body one and a hair one. The body one must be big enough to wrap round my sizeable body.
A dressing table area where I can sit in front of a mirror to dry my hair.
A proper hairdryer that doesn't just whisper gently onto my hair.
Blackout curtains
Air-con that keeps the room a nice temperature and doesn't blow arctic air very loudly all night.
Two of those racks to put your suitcase on.
A fridge empty so I can stash wine and beer.
A huge bed so need satnav to find DH in it.

Plug near a mirror and surface
surface near mirror in bathroom for toiletries
working hair dryer/iron
shower that’s obvious to work
2 towels per person. (Need one for body & one for hair)
2 pillows per person
curtains that close properly
obvious way to switch all lights off
no flashing lights/alarm clocks etc

can you tell I stay in a lot of hotels?

I stay in a lot of hotels. When I stayed somewhere with a mirror that was properly lit, had a plug for a hairdryer near it, a properly decent mirror, and both a plug and USB sockets next to the bed I was esctatic.
A really clean room, a bed without a million filthy pillows, curtains that are blackout with no gaps, and I'm a very happy woman

Agree - sockets and USB next to the bed. A bedside table each side, even if there's additional beds in the room. Proper USA style Air Con. More than 2 teabags.

I want hotels to be genuinely clean. Scatter cushions and throws give me the heebie jeebies. Being quiet would be great. Severe punishment for people arseing about in the corridors at 3am

Oh decent size towels!!

yes I am a larger human but frankly the towel I’ve just been given, I’m not sure would fit anyone over the ages of 11 months

Based on previous experience: A bathroom door that reaches from floor to ceiling and is not made of glass. Bathroom to be entirely separated from the bedroom with solid wall and the aforementioned door, not glass partition.

Soundproofing in the walls AND ceiling.
A mirror with good lighting and a plug socket next to it.
A small fridge to keep drinking water cold.
A tap in the bathroom which is tall enough to actually allow you to fill the kettle/water bottle without the water going everywhere but into the vessel.
A non-fixed shower head.
The extra pull-out beds for the children which are squeak-free.
Carpeted flooring (not cold hard tiles).
Socket near the bed, preferably with a USB point built in.

As some American style chain hotels have ice machines in hallways I'd like access to a drinking water tap in hallways to fill water bottles or kettles. Do not want to drink water from a bathroom tap.

I’m currently eating pineapple with a wooden coffee stirrer so I’m going for cutlery in the room now

Windows that open
Good temperature control
Duvets appropriate to the season - I stayed in a large chain hotel in January. Snow on the ground, no central heating on until 11 pm and a summer duvet. We were too cold to sleep!
A bath mat - the older we get, the more we worry about falling over in a slippery bath and breaking a bone
A desk and chair
Plug sockets by the bed
A king size bed
Carpets
A sofa bed (single)

We often take our DD with us. She has learning disabilities and can’t sleep in a bedroom on her own. It’s great Premier Inn let her sleep on the sofa bed in our room!

Blackout curtains that actually fit the fecking window properly
Tv that is new enough to take my fire stick or whatever, and not fixed at a ridiculous angle
Plugs by the bed for chargers
Mirror that you can actually easily access without leaning over furniture
Mirrors that are set at a decent height. I'm nearly 6ft and sick of crouching to see myself
Lights near said mirror
Lights that don't flicker
Fire alarms that don't give off either a bright green glow or a red intermittent light
Soundproofing so you aren't woken by people next door or above or below clunking around
Bathroom vents that aren't on permanently
Heating/air con that works
Shower that works
More than 1 bit of sugar in a caddy that has 25 milks, a zillion coffees and only 1 tea bag
A hairdryer that can be used near a mirror without realising you've got to go and ask to borrow one at reception
Bedside lights with an obvious switch so you don't have to guess and switch them all on and off to get the right one
Free wifi
Free parking

Can you tell I recently stayed at a Travelodge?! literally everything above comes from that 1 night horrible stay

Didn't virgin open a chain of hotels designed by women? It was all about hooks, shelves, charging points etc.

I can't believe they haven't sorted this yet.. so frustrating. Stayed in a PI last night. Same bloody thing. How long have we had mobiles for ? 20 years surely ? Still had to hang off the end of my bed to reach the bloody socked !

Yes to outlets near the bed and the desk, but also no recessed plug sockets which don't accommodate a converter. USB ports are good. I'm impressed by the hotels - mostly airport, mostly not chain, not always expensive - that have plug sockets for plugs from other countries - for example, in the UK a plug socket that takes the Americas grounded plug and one that takes the European two-round-pronged plug.

Lighting! First of all, enough, but bonus points for adjustable. I've often found that super-cheap chains do this best: for example EconoLodge in the USA, or Point A in the UK.

Separate means to have some privacy while letting the light in, versus blocking out the light. There are multiple options for this, but a set of net curtains and another set of heavy curtains work.

Glassware! In the Covid > era it's common to find absolutely no glassware at all, even in hotels that used to have it. I don't really like disposable plastic or Styrofoam cups, but they're far better than nothing. I have fond memories of staying at a very cheap hotel in Bucharest (>£35 per night for a double) that had three sets of glassware, x2: wine, tall, and short.

This more of a service thing than a design consideration, but I've had a few experiences recently where I had to troubleshoot something not working - television, refrigerator, microwave, clock/alarm - and it turned out that it was simply unplugged, but I needed to pull out a huge, heavy unit to find that out. Give housekeeping an extra 5-10 minutes in each room to test the electronics and make sure everything's ready for the next guest, or have someone else go in and do it for each room that's been vacated.

A mini fridge should be compulsory in every hotel room. It should contain water and a carton/bottle of milk.

Nothing worse than arriving after a long journey to find six teeny pods of milk alongside a plethora of teas/coffees etc...
one mug of tea, for us, needs two of these tiny milk pods each meaning not enough milk for a bedtime brew and nothing left in the morning for when you want a brew but have to wait two hours for the breakfast room to open.