Food bank Fussiness

[VeronicaFranklin]

I volunteer at a local food bank on a Saturday morning, recently due to cost of living we've had more and more people using it.

All sorts of people, some working families, some exclusively on benefits, some elderly, retired due to ill health and some homeless / alcohol/ drug addiction. There really is no face to food poverty and it's very sad to see so many people struggling to feed themselves and their families. I feel glad there are places people can turn to if they need help...

However...

We give people a sheet when they arrive, they tick a number of items (depending on if they are a family/couple/single person) they wish to have, I go off to pack up their items.

More recently I've had people complain if they wanted something we had a previous week but don't have this week, i.e. requesting Frosties and we only have Cornflakes, or Semi skimmed milk but we only have skimmed. One lady said to me on Sat when I didn't have the soup she liked ' well it just isn't good enough'...

Also people arguing with us if say someone has received a certain brand (donated) and they haven't. For example someone got 'Asda's own washing up liquid and saw someone had got 'Fairy' brand washing up liquid and started complaining it wasn't fair...

I just feel really disappointed. Everyone is entitled to help and most people are very thankful but we rely solely on donations and charity surplus to run the food bank, many of the volunteers give up their time to help even when their circumstances aren't much better than those using the food bank and we often buy items to bring to cover the shortfall in donations especially toiletries such as sanitary towels and toothpaste, but I can't help feeling recently like people are being ungrateful.

Is it unreasonable if you're getting something for free to feel you're entitled to complain? How would you handle it?

Actually if all volunteers had an opinion that you didn’t think aligned with your charity’s “values” you would have to put up with it unless you can do without any volunteers. You need them but they don't need you.

Yes, it seems the OP is mostly interested in judging.

The thing the OP has chosen to post about their charitable efforts is a little bit of judgement, with the addition half way thorugh the thread about how when they were porr, they were the good type of poor who remembered to say thank you nicely. Heartwarming stuff!

It's not the fact that they are moaning. It is the complaining to the volunteers that is the issue.

Nurses complain all the time about their job and patients.

I can only imagine that if a charity had values that failed to align with those of any prospective volunteers, the values of the charity would be rather extraordinary, and one might be inclined to think misplaced.
Fortunately we're talking here of a straightforward, very widely held value system, incorporating respect, empathy and discretion. Which is generally not difficult to find in people who wish to volunteer.

We are not talking about whether volunteers should have "respect, empathy and discretion". We are talking about whether volunteers have the right to have a negative opinion about the attitude of some service users and whether they should be "allowed" to express that opinion in private and/or anonymously. You obviously think the two are mutually exclusive but I disagree.

Why wouldnt it, it covers Mercedes and other such cars... as long as it meets the mobility of the clients requirements it qualifies.

to follow on

www.lloydmotorgroup.com/NewCars/Land-Rover/Motability

but thats just 1 type of car that was mentioned, many 'fancy' brand cars do qualify.

The link states Land Rover vehicles are not eligible!

I commend you for the time and energy you have contributed to this thread today.

It is these type of remarks that demonstrate you did not post the thread in good faith. You have got what you wanted - a thread belittling the poor.

As I said before, no one who cared about people using a food bank would have started this thread.

@dianthus101

Nurses do not depend on donated medical supplies to achieve the results they deliver.

This should be good news for the sick of the UK, because there are clearly a lot of begrudgers out there who would like the sick to be properly grateful for the care they receive.

No, it just demonstrates she is well versed in customer services and dealing with such pleasant individuals.

@dianthus101

It absolutely is the fact that they are moaning at the volunteers, specifically at her, that has pissed off the OP.

That's why she makes goes to the trouble here of mentioning that she has a newborn baby whom she has to leave behind in order to volunteer.

The paupers owe her a personal debt of gratitude.

To be fair, and I've read all your posts objectively, you do write in a pretty patronising way. Almost in the area of what a lot of MNers would call 'mansplainy'. But you are a woman so it's not that. But there's a tone to it. There's definitely an air.

Anyway, happy volunteering and carry on etc. (Yes, I donate. And think it's appalling I have to. And understand that some families have ASD, allergies etc to negotiate.) (And I actually do volunteer myself in a complex area of state welfare and special needs.)

The amount of sheer entitlement in this thread has genuinely made me reconsider my weekly donations.

Think it will be better to channel those funds to billions of people desperately fighting for their survival, than squander it on ingrates in this country who already have an extremely generous welfare system to satisfy their needs and then some.

Thanks for the eye-opener OP (and others).

If it is your opinion that I didn't post this thread in good faith, then of course, you are entitled to it and I respect that. Watch yourself though, that could be misconstrued as you being judgy on a thread full of people criticising people for making judgements while making judgements themselves! The irony!

If I didn't care about the people using the food bank I wouldn't be up all night with a screaming newborn, leave them with family to go get screamed at by (some) people for something entirely out of my control.

I posted the thread to vent at what I perceived as ungrateful rude behaviour, not to 'belittle the poor' as you put it, nor to discourage people from donating, volunteering or using food banks. If you are that easily discouraged though, I would say your heart isn't in it in the first place!

Oh to live in a world where we can all censor each others opinions on posts and threads on forums, MN would cease immediately and it would be a pretty boring place.

S'pose it must have been a dog sh!t on pram wheels type of news day for the amount of conflict this thread has caused.

In the spirit of balance, I've seen the error in my ways and this weekend when said person kicks off, I'll pull a packet of Frosties and fairy liquid out of my jumper and hopefully make their weekend.

I'm a collection point for the food bank at work. We have posters displayed requesting unbranded products because your generosity goes further (the official line) but they privately told me that they have issues with people demanding brands and complaining someone else got branded things so they prefer only generic

I am openly criticising and feel no need to be careful about that. You write in very snide tones about people you claim to want to help.

If you didn't intend to deter donations - take a look at the post just above which includes The amount of sheer entitlement in this thread has genuinely made me reconsider my weekly donations. That is a result of what you chose to do today - either you meant that or you did not, but either way you started this thread. As they put it, Thanks for the eye-opener OP.

It isn't a charity....!

You cannot control what someone wants to post about. What you can do, is choose whether to respond or not.

Does everyone not hide behind their anonymity on a forum, you mention it like it is something I am doing purposely that others don't? If anything for safety/safeguarding? Would you prefer if I posted my real name, exact location and shoe size?

'blithely spew her poison'...just wow. You seem slightly disgruntled.

I'm glad I have anonymity, or I fear you might hunt me down.

If you didn't intend to deter donations - take a look at the post just above which includes The amount of sheer entitlement in this thread has genuinely made me reconsider my weekly donations. That is a result of what you chose to do today - either you meant that or you did not, but either way you started this thread. As they put it, Thanks for the eye-opener OP.

It is interesting that you read this comment from the perspective of me causing someone to not want to donate anymore... when actually the comment from this person is actually in support of me, and their decision is entirely based as a result of the number of people on this thread who are demonstrating rude entitlement which incidentally is the reason I posted in the first place. Because I was shocked at someone's rude entitled behaviour. This thread has, if anything, just reinforced that most people are rude and entitled.

I've got a 'ru-uu-ude and entitled' earworm in my head now, to the tune of Sometimes by Erasure.

This thread makes me wonder why so many people who have issues with an anonymous forum are posting on an anonymous forum.