How does Charles remain so calm and composed amidst his own grief?

[asblindasabat]

His speech yesterday was excellent.

I know he kinda has to, but how does he just keep going? I don’t know how he didn’t cry doing that speech yesterday.

If it was my parent I don’t think I could do any of it. I think I’d just be a mess.

He likely hasn't been still long enough for it to hit properly. He has definitely been red-eyed throughout.

He was raised that way.

that’s why he is is the king and you are not 😂

Life time of training. Being brought up with a stiff upper lip mentality.

When my son died (unexpectedly) I was fine, I did the eulogy at the church and was perplexed at the time that everyone else was sobbing.

Held it all together until I couldn't get a trolley out of the trolley bay in Tesco.

Grief is a funny thing.

Camilla certainly seems grief stricken.

You can clearly see he has been teary and crying.
On the other hand having to be so insanely busy will also help roll him along with his grief, i'e keep busy.

He's also 72 and has been blessed with his mother until his own old age.
Whilst undoubtedly he will feel grief,immense saddnes, he will have been more emotionally prepared than perhaps a sudden death that occurs when you are younger.

Boris's Johnson also lost his mother whilst in office.

He’s been in training for a long time for it

Adrenaline and keeping busy gets you through initially.

I noticed that he called her mama whereas at the Jubilee he called her mummy. It struck me that he probably spoke about her in a more formal way to help him get through it.

Also he wants to honour her and pay tribute to her. that motivating factor would have helped him.

There is little stiff upper lip and that's why I like him.

His grief, red eyes are there for all to see.

Compartmentalizing? To me grief comes by waves. In a calm moment he might perfectly be able to do what needs to be done in a calm and composed manner. I hope he has great length of time alone and away to slowly recover. It's such a major loss.

I barely cried when my dad died. I just had to get on with it, lone parent, finish one job and started another the day after his funeral.
I did his eulogy too, but there were so many people at his funeral it carried me through.

He has been groomed and trained into it since he was born.At 70+yo, he has had plenty of practice

Agree. When I recently lost a relative, I just wanted to get out of the house and wanted to be around normal people. DH took me out for lunch.

I also think it has obviously expected due to the Queen's age. He has had a long time to prepare for this moment. There haven been rumours that the Queen has been ill/declining for a while and I also wonder if this has played a part in it. While I was devastated when my relative died, I also felt a sense of relief after seeing them ill and suffering for some time. I had also 'made my peace' with them prior to their passing.

It would be very weird if he was crying. Can you imagine?

He’s had a lifetime of training to be composed and dignified.

My darling dad died recently. I cried for weeks on my own, but there was no way I was going to do that at the funeral or graveside. I dug deep and found the strength to remain self-controlled.

We don't know anything about their personal relationship, so there's a chance he's not actually that grief stricken.

Regardless, this has been prepared for decades. That speech will have been written and rewritten so many times by a team of content specialists - it wasn't him rambling on the spot.

My mum literally never cries in public and I've only seen her cry privately maybe 3 times. Doesn't mean she doesn't feel things. Still waters run deep and all that.

I think King Charles looks pretty broken tbh.

I can completely relate to your post about holding it together in public but it all coming apart at unexpected moments.

I am sorry for the loss of your son, no parent should ever have to bury a child.

When faced with things I had to do after my parents died, I went into coping mode. Focus on the job in hand and shove the emotion to one side to be dealt with later.

obviously the royal family have much more to do and far more publicly than most people but I imagine is is the same. A deep breath and time to compose themselves and then onto the duty side of it all.

The only way I could get through a family funeral was straight faced because I had DC to look after and I knew if I let it out, I wouldn't be able to stop. It was hurtful to hear comments that because I didn't give a public display of grief, I didn't really feel anything.

He's trying to get through the first days.

Yes, a lifetime of training - literally!

Remember when The Queen returned from some trip and hadn't seen Charles for weeks and she greeted him with a handshake rather than a hug? It's peak stiff upper lip.

He is doing well I think.

He was clearly trying very hard to hold it together during his address. I was thinking how awful it would have been for his mother though, as she was much younger and adored her father.

He was raised by nannies and then sent to boarding school.
His relationship with his mother is very formal.

His experience of grief is going to be very different to that of someone whose mother raised them - fed them, bathed them, put them to bed, took them to school, got up to them at night, cuddled them when they had nightmares. Cuddled them at all.

I think they're just trained from the very start of their lives to repress emotions and have a stuff upper lip. Their upbringing and family lives are not comparable the way that the vast majority of us behave and function as a family unit.