Writing my will - I would appreciate your thoughts.

[AdelinaLM]

I am in consultation with a solicitor but the more I try to work through what I want to happen the more complicated it seems.

So, I own my house outright.
My partner lives with me. We are not married but have been together for 12 years.
We have 4 grown up DC’s between us and another ‘estranged’ DC who wouldn’t be part of my will.

When we renovated the house, my partner paid towards this- ( 20%) of the house value at the time.

In my will my thoughts are if I die first, my partner would have the right to stay here until he dies.
On his death the house would be inherited by my DC’s but with a 20% share to his DC’s between them.

Does that seem reasonable? Am I missing anything?

Sounds reasonable but might be an idea to discuss it with your partner and kids so everyone knows what to expect.

Might be worth adding that the house can be sold during your partner’s life if he agrees, with him getting 20% and your children the rest. After all, he might not want to live there.

Might be worth adding that the house can be sold during your partner’s life if he agrees, with him getting 20% and your children the rest. After all, he might not want to live there.

Already a great point, hadn’t thought about that. Thank you.

You might want to think about your partner getting married and predeceasing his new wife if she's living in the house.

Oh….🤔…mmmm…

Question, if DP paid 20%, are you not tenants in common with a deed of trust saying he owns 20%? (If not, he's a trusting soul - but, also, you leave your estate open to him bringing a case to say he owns 20% anyway - best to have all that sorted properly while you're both alive).

Anyway, you might want to consider the cases of his remarriage/cohabitation/him going into a care home.

E.g. Partner remarries, dies or goes into care home, new Mrs DP lives there for another 20 years, your DC don't want to go to court to force sale of house because she is a nice old lady and very frail.... but they actually could do with the money...
Ask the lawyer to sort out something to cover that. If they are good they should have it in hand anyway.

Can you not split the house between the kids and partner. They would all own 20%. Say you’d like your partner to live there if he wants

Also, you want to deal with the estranged DC (re:will) if he/she is your child. Solicitor will know what to do to forestall claims against the estate - to be fair they rarely succeed, but you want to ideally put off the estranged DC from trying to bring a case, to save everyone the stress

Yes, should your partner marry or co-habit that would trigger the sale and division of the property.
Also, who is going to be responsible for repair and maintenance costs while he is living in the house? He might be reluctant to pay for anything, thinking improvements would benefit your children, so the house would lose value over time.

Equally the children might not want want to finance his improved lifestyle, with new bathroom or heating for example.

It's all quite complex, possibly easier to sell the house straight away and share out the proceeds. There are quite a few threads on these questions, might be worth a look though Legal boards.

I would state that the house must be sold within say six months of Probate. Leave partner whatever % of the proceeds you deem reasonable to give him enough for a deposit on a different property to buy or rent, and divide the rest as you wish.

Appoint two executors from your side. I know you love and care for him, but as you are not married you do not have to house him, but I doubt you want him penniless either. Any new partner/wife of his then has no hold over the house either.

Just a thought.

Is your house owned solely by you, or with your DP? And if with DP, as joint tenants or tenants in common? These two choices have radically different outcomes in an estate. In one case the house automatically goes to the other party and in the other you can give your percentage share to someone else (but you'll need to look them up...).

If the house goes to DP, you can't assume that he will follow your original wishes and leave to your DCs in his will. MN is littered with cases where DP decided to do something completely different that cut out the original family. So you need to structure your home ownership (as it's usually the largest asset) as well as the will so that it ends up with the right people after DP dies.

You can put in a clause saying he can stay in the house until he remarries.

Who will be responsible for the maintenance,repairs and insurance of the house? Who will enforce this responsibility and how? What happens if one of your DC dies before DP? What happens if DP has to go into a care home or decides to leave the house empty or occupied by some ne'er do well?

If your partner is in his nineties and in poor health, the arrangement you describe might work out reasonably well in the short term. If your children are wealthy,you are wealthy and you have left a large sum to trustees to supervise DPs occupancy and pay for repairs/maintenance ,it could work. If the house is really all you have, the whole arrangement could come to be described by your children as " a noose round my neck". A lot of DPs would not be enchanted by the arrangement either. You've already got one estranged child,so you know families can fall out.

Alternatives include giving DP a bequest equal to a certain portion of the house value and first dibs at buying it at market value within 6 months of your death...or...leaving the house to him subject to a charge ( mortgage) equal to 80 % of its value to be repaid within 5 years of your death or on earlier sale or transfer of ownership.

Oh, bloody hell - so complicated.
The solicitor has gone away to think too and we will meet with her again.

To answer some questions. The house is mine and was my family home with my children, bought on divorce.
There is no joint tenant arrangements though the solicitor said she would think more about that. Yes my DP trusts me to abide by the arrangement we have. At the same time he pays no rent or bills here other than food and Sky!

I don’t want - and he doesn’t want - to inherit the house, he respects the fact that this house was my DC’s home and that as a single parent I’ve worked damned hard to own it.
We know the risks of him inheriting, then leaving it all to his DC’s and my DC’s missing out completely.

I hadn’t thought about the maintenance to the house either. My DC’s might not be in a position to maintain this house, with no rent off it and not able to sell either. I wanted the ‘right to stay’ to protect my DP as my DC’s father will be pushing them to sell.

If the house was sold, my DP isn’t going to be able to buy much with his 20%.

i had also wondered if living rent free after my death was a good arrangement. Would that negate the 20% to be inherited by DP’s DC’s.

No idea what happens in a care home situation.

Solicitor suggested marriage was the best option inheritance tax wise.

Not judging but I have estranged dc and if I had anything worth leaving it would be split equally between ALL my dc...
Please be very certain..

Thanks, however the estranged DC isn’t mine, it is my DP’s. That DC has already had any money due…

DP’s 20% share in the house would be split two ways rather than three.

We are currently rewriting our wills after consulting a paralegal firm which specialises in wills and poa. They came to our house and chatted about options.

We are mid 60s and in good health. We are setting up a ‘Family Protection Trust.’ Advised our estate will not incur inheritance tax as not big enough. Married couple, on first death house goes to spouse. Second death, left to our three children. The house cannot be touched for care fees and a sale cannot be forced by council to pay fees. The dcs are also trustees and executors of our wills. Together they decide what to do with the house after our deaths. If a child deceases us, their share can only go to a blood child of their’s. It cannot be claimed by a spouse or to cover any debts, should they not wish it as it is protected by the trust. Their share of proceeds of selling the house can remain in the trust for them to access whenever they want. Money will not be counted if they divorce. We each, and the dc will have ‘Lasting Power of Attorney’ for dh and I which means they eventually will be able to make financial and health decisions for us once we are no longer able to.

The Paralegal will be coming back to finalise everything in time and we can ask questions at any time. This seemed the best solution for us. Every situation is different and I am sure one can be found to suit you.

The trust we are setting up also protects against any other claimants,( thinking of your estranged dc).

If I were your partner I would have been looking for a title change to the house stating 80/20% tenants in common or whatever you deemed it to be at the time at the time of the extension. Perhaps you should do this now in retrospect.

It is then easy to put a lifetime interest in your will allowing him to stay on in the house until he dies or gets remarried if you so wish. You can also state that he is not allowed to move anyone else into your house. The house is not to be sold to allow him to even downsize and is not to be used for care home fees. You will agree things like who pays for maintenance and you can set a £££ limit for this after all both parties - your DC and him or his estate will ultimately benefit from the sale of the house. It is usual that ongoing maintenance will be paid by the occupier but large things eg a roof would be joint. He can also have his 20% share bought out by him on your death by your children if he and they agreed. I have to say your solicitor doesn't sound very clued up on this. You could get married or if you don't you should draw up a cohabitation agreement.

I’m in the middle of sorting my DMs estate. She WAS married to my stepfather, but had bought the house they Ives in with proceeds from divorce. It was solely in her name up to last year, when for some reason she changed it to tenants in common with him having a 20% share.
her will had a trust arrangement whereby he would be allowed to stay in the house until either he cohabited with someone else or went into long term care. However, she (or her solicitor) actually put the address of the property they lived in when the will was drawn up. As they had moved several times since then, that part of the will failed. My stepfather is in a home and no longer has capacity so I’m applying for Deputyship to manage his affairs and sell the house. It’s a bloody nightmare!
My suggestion to you is, make sure each of you have Power of Attorneys set up where each of you act as deputy for the other, PLUS you each have one of your own children. That way, if one of you does end up losing capacity, the other (or their child) can act on their behalf. Do this ASAP.
Then with regard to the property, ensure it’s worded so that it means ANY house you may own. Also, that he can stay living there until either he dies, cohabits or goes into full time residential care. You can also include a statement that he remains responsible for the upkeep of the property as long as he lives there.
Regarding the children, you need to decide what you want to happen if one of them dies before you, do you want their share to be shared between the remaining beneficiaries, or pass down to their children?

If the house is held as tenants in common, then if he needs to go into a care home, his 20% can absolutely be included in a financial assessment for fees. The LA will require a full declaration of his assets and income.

@Soontobe60 yes his 20% can but not the rest of it. Sorry. I wasn't clear there.

Could you buy some life insurance for your partner, to pay out in the event of your death, enough to buy out the remaining 80% if the house. Given he pays no bills, this should be affordable?

Put a clause in the will allowing 2 years (or whatever) of rent free inhabitance by him, at which point he either needs to buy out the other 80% with the life insurance or move out and allow the house to be sold?

I was going to suggest that your partner has the right to live in the house if he wishes, until he marries / dies / cohabits. At which point, whichever comes sooner, the house is sold. With him being responsible for maintenance etc.

The house itself would be divided into 5

2/5 to your child A
2 / 5 to your child B
1 / 5 to your partner for him to disperse as he wishes, or used for care home fees if appropriate.

And then I read that he doesn't contribute to the household bills.

He's mugging you off.

So I'd go with a quick sale and give him 10% if you must. He must be racking up a fortune at your expense to leave his kids.

Not the point of your post, I know, but I'd think longer and harder about this.

Yeah. I agree.

He's not contributing to the bills. This means he's allowing you to treat him every month so that he has more money for himself. Fk that. I wouldn't leave him a penny.

I would leave the house and estate split equally between my children. Nothing to partner or stepchildren