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Original poster

Writing my will - I would appreciate your thoughts.

94 replies

AdelinaLM · 14/07/2022 19:54

I am in consultation with a solicitor but the more I try to work through what I want to happen the more complicated it seems.

So, I own my house outright.
My partner lives with me. We are not married but have been together for 12 years.
We have 4 grown up DC’s between us and another ‘estranged’ DC who wouldn’t be part of my will.

When we renovated the house, my partner paid towards this- ( 20%) of the house value at the time.

In my will my thoughts are if I die first, my partner would have the right to stay here until he dies.
On his death the house would be inherited by my DC’s but with a 20% share to his DC’s between them.

Does that seem reasonable? Am I missing anything?

OP posts:
coodawoodashooda · 14/07/2022 22:40

Candleabra · 14/07/2022 22:33

I would leave the house and estate split equally between my children. Nothing to partner or stepchildren

Agreed.

SuperCamp · 14/07/2022 22:40

Solicitor suggested marriage was the best option inheritance tax wise

This sounds like terrible advice! As soon as you marry your DP has a claim on 50% of the house?

Is it even an issue? If you leave your main residence to your descendants (children / grandchildren) your Inheritance Tax threshold rises to £500k.

Is your estate likely to be more than that? (Money left in your pension and left to your D.C. as beneficiaries does not count a part of your estate for IT purposes).

What was his housing situation before he moved in with you? Did he rent? Own his own place? In your DP’s shoes I would be using the freedom from rent or mortgage that he currently enjoys towards a Buy To Let.

Another complication: did you also put ££ into the renovation? Because if so your contribution added to the value of your asset. In which case was his contribution 20% of the value of the house with or without your own contribution?

in general what you propose seems fair and generally not complicated. He gets a right to reside in the house, subject to whatever constraints you decide on, and then either him or his Dc inherit 20% of the house value, your kids the rest.

parietal · 14/07/2022 22:46

If your DP gets to live in the house, he should also have to pay to maintain it.

The life-insurance thing someone suggested earlier is a good idea. How about your DP now starts paying £50 a month (or whatever) into a life-insurance policy that will pay out if you die. He should be able to afford it if he is not paying rent or bills. Then he would get a chunk of money to buy himself a new place, and the DC can inherit the house free and clear.

Arucanafeather · 14/07/2022 22:46

Augend23 · 14/07/2022 21:52

Could you buy some life insurance for your partner, to pay out in the event of your death, enough to buy out the remaining 80% if the house. Given he pays no bills, this should be affordable?

Put a clause in the will allowing 2 years (or whatever) of rent free inhabitance by him, at which point he either needs to buy out the other 80% with the life insurance or move out and allow the house to be sold?

That’s the type of arrangement my DH’s work have in place. Shares in business are inherited by the individual director’s inheritors but the business has life insurance to the value of the shares and there is an agreement in place that those who inherit the shares must sell them back to the business, who buys them with the life insurance payout.

HollowTalk · 14/07/2022 22:46

Hang on, why isn't he paying rental bills? And if he is living virtually free of charge, why isn't he buying his own place?

SuperCamp · 14/07/2022 22:47

If he used his current freedom from rent or mortgage to buy a rental property, he would have a place to move to if you died first.

So no need to leave him a right to live in the house. Just leave him his 20%.

SausagePourHomme · 14/07/2022 22:48

I too would leave everything to my own kids. He can leave his assets to his kids. The best thing you can do is to provide your own children with financial security for the future. You've been housing him, allowing him to save if he wished to secure his own kids future.

SkeletonFight · 14/07/2022 23:23

SuperCamp · 14/07/2022 22:40

Solicitor suggested marriage was the best option inheritance tax wise

This sounds like terrible advice! As soon as you marry your DP has a claim on 50% of the house?

Is it even an issue? If you leave your main residence to your descendants (children / grandchildren) your Inheritance Tax threshold rises to £500k.

Is your estate likely to be more than that? (Money left in your pension and left to your D.C. as beneficiaries does not count a part of your estate for IT purposes).

What was his housing situation before he moved in with you? Did he rent? Own his own place? In your DP’s shoes I would be using the freedom from rent or mortgage that he currently enjoys towards a Buy To Let.

Another complication: did you also put ££ into the renovation? Because if so your contribution added to the value of your asset. In which case was his contribution 20% of the value of the house with or without your own contribution?

in general what you propose seems fair and generally not complicated. He gets a right to reside in the house, subject to whatever constraints you decide on, and then either him or his Dc inherit 20% of the house value, your kids the rest.

This sounds like terrible advice! As soon as you marry your DP has a claim on 50% of the house?

This is not the case esp if you are tenants in common and you do a will and pre or post nup.

daisychain01 · 15/07/2022 04:03

whenwilliwillibefamous · 14/07/2022 20:18

Also, you want to deal with the estranged DC (re:will) if he/she is your child. Solicitor will know what to do to forestall claims against the estate - to be fair they rarely succeed, but you want to ideally put off the estranged DC from trying to bring a case, to save everyone the stress

The best way to deal with it so there is no come-back, is to make provision for them in the will.

On the assumption you're talking about your birth-child, whether you've fallen out with them or not, excluding a child is a very hurtful thing to do and can massively affect that person for the rest of their life. OK, if they are a "mass murderer", done some heinous crime against your family etc, then you have valid reason to not want to make provision then get a solicitor to help with the wording, but under the normal course of events it's better to include them rather than create a problem for your other children, and leave them out in the cold and create a risk of them taking court action.

LadyHelenaJustina · 15/07/2022 06:15

How does the 20% value of the house that he put in for renovations compare to the equivalent amount of rent he would have paid elsewhere?

WinterMusings · 15/07/2022 06:21

PeanutButterFalcon · 14/07/2022 20:15

Can you not split the house between the kids and partner. They would all own 20%. Say you’d like your partner to live there if he wants

Why would she want to give him & his kids 20% of HER house leaving HER kids with only 20% each when the house is 80% hers? He's had the advantage of living there mortgage free and now you want to give her kids inheritance to his kids.

WinterMusings · 15/07/2022 06:29

Ontomatopea · 14/07/2022 20:27

You can put in a clause saying he can stay in the house until he remarries.

Show quote history

...and if they just live together!

@AdelinaLM

Do any of your children (and you need to ask, not assume) want to live in your house? Or would they both/all want to sell it?

if it was sold, what would his 20% get him?

does he have separate savings? Or is it joint? Proceeds from a previous house?

OccultGnuNew · 15/07/2022 06:37

I've no experience of bequests etc - if a clause is included that says the partner can remain in the house but cannot cohabit or remarry and have someone else live there, how is that enforced? Is it down to the other beneficiaries?

What if the partner declines to move? Would it mean an expensive legal battle?

Footbal · 15/07/2022 06:44

Very interesting and informative thread. Has made me think about the agreement my mother has in place.

Clymene · 15/07/2022 07:00

Why are you letting him cocklodge?

SausagePourHomme · 15/07/2022 07:13

You also said he paid towards renovations that cost 20% of the house value, but how much did each of you put in? I would also say him living rent free has paid him back at least partially.

MrsAmaretto · 15/07/2022 07:22

Can you not give him back the 20% cash minus rent? Might be worth the loan/ mortgage to do so. In effect you’ve provided a roof over his head for him and his kids and will continue to do so until your death - is that not enough?

Original poster
AdelinaLM · 15/07/2022 08:33

I will come back to this, just about to start work.

Thank you for raising so many questions to make me think.

One bit of re-explanation, my DP doesn’t pay rent or household bills but does buy food, pays for holidays, has bought furniture and he pays for our social life. It works for us.

To reiterate also from above, as said earlier in the thread, the estranged DC is not my DC but his. This DC has already had a significant lump sum from DP.

House value is around £550k, we both have good pensions and savings. I spent about £100,000 on renovations, he £50,000.

OP posts:
Original poster
AdelinaLM · 15/07/2022 08:45

We have also nominated each other for pension purposes - death in service etc.
His pension is much larger than mine.

I am feeling so much more stressed about this, it is definitely not as simple as first thought (20% in, 20% out back to him was how my my simple brain worked 🤔😀)

OP posts:
Augend23 · 15/07/2022 09:06

Well he also hasn't put in 20% of the house's value - renovations in total cost £150k, house is worth £550k of which he has contributed £50k - so he has put in 1/11th, or approx 9.1% so 20% wouldn't be right whichever way you slice it.

SkeletonFight · 15/07/2022 09:10

AdelinaLM · 15/07/2022 08:33

I will come back to this, just about to start work.

Thank you for raising so many questions to make me think.

One bit of re-explanation, my DP doesn’t pay rent or household bills but does buy food, pays for holidays, has bought furniture and he pays for our social life. It works for us.

To reiterate also from above, as said earlier in the thread, the estranged DC is not my DC but his. This DC has already had a significant lump sum from DP.

House value is around £550k, we both have good pensions and savings. I spent about £100,000 on renovations, he £50,000.

Oh that's a bit different from before re renovations.

SkeletonFight · 15/07/2022 09:12

AdelinaLM · 15/07/2022 08:45

We have also nominated each other for pension purposes - death in service etc.
His pension is much larger than mine.

I am feeling so much more stressed about this, it is definitely not as simple as first thought (20% in, 20% out back to him was how my my simple brain worked 🤔😀)

Why would you do that? You are in effect potentially giving away a part of your estate from your children. He is doing the same.

Original poster
AdelinaLM · 15/07/2022 10:13

SkeletonFight · 15/07/2022 09:12

Why would you do that? You are in effect potentially giving away a part of your estate from your children. He is doing the same.

Show quote history

Because what would each of us live on, without the other, in retirement?

OP posts:
Original poster
AdelinaLM · 15/07/2022 10:14

SkeletonFight · 15/07/2022 09:10

Oh that's a bit different from before re renovations.

Show quote history

The house was worth £250k at the time of the renovation.

OP posts:
Augend23 · 15/07/2022 10:25

AdelinaLM · 15/07/2022 10:14

The house was worth £250k at the time of the renovation.

Show quote history

But was it worth £250k after renovations or before?

E.g. worth before renovations £100k, spend on renovations £150k (if which he contributed £50k) - worth after £250k then your 20% makes sense.

Worth before renovations £250k, renovations £150k - worth after £400k, then he's contributed 1/8th, which is 12.5% not 20%