Kate and Pippa Middleton

[hellosally]

I'm reading about Pippa's new £15 million home and another pregnancy. I am sure both sisters are lovely people but looking at their lives, it seems like neither ever had any intention of working and used school and university to get themselves mixing in affluent circles to bag a wealthy man to fund their lifestyles.
Do people like this still really exist? I know we all have choices but at times in my life when I have mixed in more affluent circles in university and London, men would spot gold diggers and women who would need to be financially supported a mile off and would not contemplate taking them seriously. I dont know any women who havent have some kind of career or any men that want someone who hasnt worked.
is there anyone bringing up their daughters(or sons) like this in this day and age? would you bankroll them if it all went wrong? just curious.

I'm 53, was born into a wealthy family and was bought up that way.

My mother in particular wanted me to be a clone of her:

1. get married as soon as possible,
2. have 3 children as soon as possible, and
3. never work outside the home again.

My husband she expected to support me and the children in the style I was accustomed to.

I stupidly did number 1 when I was just 21. She forgot that with regards to number 2, I'd made it clear that I didn't ever want children (and I've stuck to that). Number 3...well she also forgot that it was no longer the 50s/60s and that very few men would be happy with being the sole breadwinner.

She's 80 and still pissed that I didn't follow in her footsteps (not that it worked for her, my father left her for another woman when I was 21...a week after my wedding).

• know some women

But St Andrews still is just a university! Lots of kids from different backgrounds go there. Catherine Middleton does work in that her time is continually accounted for - and she has a pretty boring job, going from place to place, always having to be super disciplined and pretending to be interested in everyone, always having to be super groomed, always subject to scrutiny.

Women have always had seen as successful if married well. I thought it’s a time of past, but it’s not. About two years ago I read agony aunt page in the national newspaper. Retired couple had two daughters , one married other single. They wrote a will and gave everything to the single daughter and nothing to married one, as her husband had good job. Married one accepted parents’s decision , but cut them out of her life. Advice was to write a letter to married daughter and say : “we’re sorry that you think we treat you differently then your sister”. I was shocked that national newspaper thought such unfair and sexist attitudes are acceptable in today’s world. I stopped reading this newspaper after that.

You wouldn't call what any of the royals do "work". Kate might have "engagements" that they like to call work but it isn't work. "Work" to them equates to...... chauffeur driven to an event organised by a Private Secretary, their clothes washed, ironed and paid for by someone else. Cut a ribbon, read a speech written by someone else, driven back to a luxurious fully staffed home. No worries of finding a babysitter, planning, shopping and cooking a meal, no house waiting to be cleaned...... and that's the same for all of them. They live fairy tale lives and they expect and get all of us to pay for it. The huge energy hikes on the way won't affect them one bit, we all will have to make sure of that.

Pippa's DH is from a very wealthy, self-made family, who have been friends of the Middletons for years. He has created massive wealth on his own. Hats off to them.

The Middletons lived in a semi when Kate was born - no massive inherited wealth on display there.

I admire people who work hard and achieve - although an element of luck always comes into it.

This is just that elevated. A wife to oversea the staff and help entertain business associates. These kind of guys don’t want a wife that works because they want to be able to concentrate on their own career.

@LivesinLondon2000 i think that all the children of this generation of middletons had their education covered by the trust which provides cash for specific purposes. Depending on the actual nature of his role at BA, Mike could have made a lot of money - remember he will have had shares when it floated. A few of my friends had fathers who were senior BA at that time (older though and therefore probably more senior than MM) who made massive amounts. I do however think that there has been some subbing of their housing bill to ensure that they live in a property that’s sufficiently secure for the grandchildren to stay in- I seem to recall that when they were dating at Uni, the close protection officers had to kip on the sofa. Would not surprise me if the house they bought 6 or 7 years ago was helped along by William

The upper middle-class women of leisure - the luckiest demographic in society !

I absolutely forgot that Vogue and Pippa are Sils

Wasn't there a thing where Vogue wasn't invited to Pippa's wedding.
I like Vogue and Spencer and hey come across as nice and normal(ish)

Sorry but there was, I was around then and remember it well.. and a commoner is ANYONE who isn't a member of a Royal family, even if they're Aristocratic..

Yes. Much was also made of the fact she was working in a nursery. I got the impression Diana was the sort of person who preferred to be doing something vaguely useful, even if it was just a time-filler. She would probably have been happier as the wife of a 'mere' aristocrat, managing the house and social calendar; rather than being ferried from duty to duty on a strict timetable as a princess.

You're really just showing how little you know about what they do, and how they live their lives.

If having to be somewhere at a certain time, to meet certain people, having absorbed your briefing notes and presenting yourself appropriately isn't work, what is it, pleasure?

It’s work but it’s a fluff, let’s be honest. I wouldn’t want their lives and this isn’t envy.

Yes that's right Vogue wasn't invited even though her & Spencer were very much together... Possibly engaged? They are never ever photographed together & never mention each other even though their dc (who would be first cousins!!) are the same age..

I’m not convinced that life now is better than when my grandparents were younger. She was doing one job inside the home and he was doing one job outside the house. There’d have been times when she did more and times when she could relax more.

Now most women are doing far more than one job and many are doing two jobs. It’s a joke that women think their lives are better now.

I know we all have choices but at times in my life when I have mixed in more affluent circles in university and London, men would spot gold diggers and women who would need to be financially supported a mile off and would not contemplate taking them seriously. I dont know any women who havent have some kind of career or any men that want someone who hasnt worked.

I'm not sure why you care so much about what 'men' prefer, but I reckon quite a few men, provided they could afford it, would have no problem with a wife who doesn't work and is completely dependent on them. Of course, this is unlikely to be something they'd admit in casual conversation, especially to a woman. But you only have to take a look at the marital arrangements among the wealthier types to see that this is true.

As for 'gold diggers', yes, Pippa obviously got a very comfortable lifestyle from her marriage, one she probably would not have been able to achieve by herself. However, surely it's fair to say that he got something out of it too? He now gets to attend prestigious royal events and his children are the niece and nephew of a future queen and the cousins of a future king. That caliber of connections is priceless.

So who's the 'gold digger'?

Marrying within your social class has been going on and encouraged for centuries - particularly in the upper classes.

Of course there are many examples of women 'marrying well, ' this could be a concerted effort to be well turned out at all times, be socially aware and a good support system for the breadwinner. In the last 50 years it could be that they met at uni where different groups of people mingle together.

Don' t forget the Downton Abbey scenario where the husband marries for money to keep the estate going

I suppose it depends what you are comparing it with. Being a lawyer or a barrister, being a consultant. Being a Headteacher.
Working in admin ,
being a teaching assistant,
working in retail. They are all work but require very different levels of commitment,
preparation,
accountability and working hours.
Those sneering at Kate not working presumably have very high profile,
high pressure jobs working very long hours.
The assumption being that if a woman doesn’t work very long hours it isn’t work. Dodgy rule stick I would say.
The nanny picks up the childcare I assume. Is that considered work?

Never ever is a string word. And it's perfectly possible that they see each other and manage to not get papped because one or both doesn't want to put their kids in the line light. Or that any random two SILs even with similar aged kids, have very little in common beyond "How's potty training"

The other thing to say is that women married to men who work very long hours are doing a lot to keep the family home running.
The support role they play is invaluable to the family as a whole , and yes, it is ‘work’.
In the case of Kate and Pippa,
Im sure they have lots of help. However many women do all the housework,
cooking and admin as well as caring for children.
Its a lot.

I’d love to know her working schedule as a lawyer.

I followed her on Istagram for a while and her life was one continuous sailing holiday after another. There is no chance she was holding down a paid job of any description.

Your colleague is wrong.

Vogue lived (and now has a second home in the same place) in what is considered avery affluent part of Dublin. She went to a private girls school and went to uni in Aberdeen.

I remember hearing her on a tv show and she laughed as she recounted a story where people told her she had married well and come up in the world. She replied she came from a very nice home in a very nice part of the world herself despite people’s attempts to insist she had married into money.

And would Alizee Thevanet, a highly accomplished and attractive financial analyst from a very wealthy French family, have married a failed marshmallow mogul and university drop out, had it not been for the fact that her sister in law is a future queen and her children, if she has any, will be cousins of a future king?

I'm not saying this to have a go at James Middleton, who seems like a nice lad. But given that women tend to marry men who are at least their equal in terms of educational and professional accomplishment, I think it's fair to say that James, just like his sisters, did pretty well for himself in the marriage market.

Pippa just issued a press release announcing that she'd completed a Masters degree and her paper was accepted to a major conference, which I find impressive. She does seem to have drive and ambition. It's a shame the daughters seem to have been raised to do nothing in their lives other than chase rich husbands.

Remember Kate originally accepted a place at Edinburgh (all the gossip and news at the time said that William would be going to Edinburgh) and when it was announced that he was actually going to St Andrew's instead, Kate dropped out of Edinburgh very last minute. As in so last minute she'd already found her accommodation for Edinburgh and met her housemates, who of course she left in the lurch. And then applied to St Andrew's last minute which was very risky as it easily could have left her with no uni place at all. Her school actually made her write a letter of apology to Edinburgh for changing her mind so late. Why the very last minute change of plans if not to chase William? She also went to the same small town in Chile as William during her gap year, arriving after he left. And everyone knows the infamous story of how she removed the thick sweater she'd been given to model so she could walk the catwalk in her underwear knowing he was in the audience. She went to pretty extreme lengths to stalk William.

Kate had a full time paid job for a decade after university
No she didn't. She very briefly worked part-time (like 2 days a week) as a buyer for some fashion company, but quit because she wanted to be available for William whenever he called. She's never had a full-time salaried job.

As for work, yes I can see that some of what she does is work, but she certainly doesn't work anywhere approaching full time. Maybe the equivalent of two days a week and that's being generous. She frequently goes weeks or even months during summer without a single engagement.

A lifestyle.