Worst things people say/ask when you’ve had a child

[Wonderingmum77]

People say/ask such weird RANDOM things when you’ve had a baby. Some very very inconsiderate. I’ve just had one and I want to rant..

• after my c section my dad said “do you think you love your baby the same as he wasn’t born naturally”
• people ALWAYS want to know how much DC sleeps? And then seem disappointed when I say fine? Do u get a kick out of it if I say badly??
• sleep when the baby sleeps is the worst advice!
• Whenever DC makes a slight noise someone will go “HES HUNGRY”
• People comparing my DC to others. He was premie, so of course is v different to babies his age.
• people constantly telling me I need to be extra careful because DC was prem. he is now a thriving 11lb baby… if he wasn’t prem does that mean I could be less careful?
• the constant “is your baby warm enough” in 25 degree heat.
• When people say “oh he is so moany” when he makes a noise because he wants to be sat up looking around and they want to hold him like a little newborn,
• “in my day we done that and it was just fine….”
• the contradiction of “every baby is very different” and the guidelines of how to look after children are so regimented.

RANT OVER

People still say random shit to you about your kids when their older. It doesn't get any better. Enjoy it!

@Iceewicee the MOST RANDOM shit ever

She is cold. - just because her hands are cold doesn’t mean she is, it’s 24 degrees!!

She needs socks. - and she will remove them as quick as you put them on!

She needs her dummy - no… she needs you to get up off your ass and entertain her more.

people ALWAYS want to know how much DC sleeps? And then seem disappointed when I say fine? Do u get a kick out of it if I say badly??

Yes, people always seemed to find it very amusing to point out that I was going to have to wave goodbye to a good night’s sleep for a very long time!

@FTMFML its the obsession with baby being to cold. I’m always worried (especially in hotter weather) about baby over heating!!!!!

@watcherintherye from the millisecond I got pregnant; I’ve been told how little sleep I’m going to get. DS is ok. Wakes up 4 hourly, so we still get sleep.. just a bit broken. As soon as I say that it’s “WAIT FOR THE 4 MONTH REGRESSION”

even if my baby slept terribly I think I’d lie just to spite people

Oooh I've got some good ones! People are just nuts. MIL has said:
Oh we used to put ours lying on there stomach and covered in a blanket and they where fine....
Yes! 30 years ago when it wasn't very well researched

Oh I managed to breastfeed until they where three and I had two under two....
Good for you and your magic tits DS had tongue tie and couldn't latch ( I feel bad enough about not being able to breast feed thanks!)

He's too cold he needs a blanket on...
erm no he doesn't it's not safe sleeping

That car seat is a nightmare to strap in does he have to be rear facing why can I not just put him in the front...
because you can't I've explained this enough times now

Personal favourite: how do they manage in third world country's when there's all these rules now ...
WHAT!! How is that relevant they don't manage and it's heartbreaking

'Your boys look sooooo different'

They don't actually, they are very similar but one is blond with very white skin and the other is dark
haired with light brown skin. I am sure they were curious to see if they had the same father (they do!)

Yes yes yes. However I have a bad sleeper- so naturally get unsolicited advice whilst people laugh at me and say 'are you not letting your mummy sleep?'

• what's his bedtime routine?
• it's because you're still breastfeeding!
• just let him cry he needs to learn ...

And the classic kicking you whilst your down of 'well wait until he can .... ' whenever you're feeling stressed.

@terrible2s the old “in my day” bollocks is a personsl fave. It’s not your day susan, it’s mine so stop x

@respark321 oh I can imagine it’s always “have you tried just letting them cry our”

When my 13 month old fell over I would pick him up and dust him off. My MIL tells the world that I smothered him in cotton wool 🙄 still love her though.

My dad (I know it didn't mean to come out as bad as it sounds), but 7hrs after giving birth to DS: "so when will you lose the weight?"

Thanks dad 🤣

When I had my third son I had countless people asking if I was disappointed or would be trying again for a girl.
I was not disappointed, I was smitten with him and it hurt.

When I went on to have my daughter people would say "you finally got your girl, you must be so happy" ect.
I adore my daughter as I do my sons. I'm sure had I had another boy, I would have been just as happy.

It still annoys me to think about it now, I hope my boys never feel second best.

I don’t have kids but even I get wound up when people say “they don’t look like you at all, they look like their dad” er firstly they are a newborn baby and have no resemblance to anyone yet, secondly they share DNA and you have given birth to him/her so of course they have some of you in them! Just shut up and stop comparing a newborn to every relative you can think of, he/she looks nothing like them as they’re their own person, they may share similar features as they get older but that isn’t known at newborn stage! Hair and skin colour yes but everything else no!

sleep when the baby sleeps is the worst advice!

It is great advice if you are able to follow it! I definitely just lay around the house napping all day for the first month or so. Not so practical by six months when you have stuff to do, I agree.

Whenever DC makes a slight noise someone will go “HES HUNGRY”

Maybe it was just DS, but this was literally true for him. Or at least, he shut up every time I put a boob in his mouth 🤷‍♀️

My worst advice was the advice to feed him baby rice, every single week from about three months in, from DM. She was obsessed. She even went out and bought a packet, about two months in advance, so I had some ready for the magic six months mark.

Just shut up and stop comparing a newborn to every relative you can think of

God yes this was annoying too! “He had your uncle Aaron’s eyes and Auntie Sophie’s nose and Uncle David’s ankles”

“in my day we done that and it was just fine….”

Oh that one really bugged me! Well no, it wasn’t fine for a lot of babies actually but let me appear to be this overprotective parent for following the rules 🤷🏼‍♀️

The sleep thing! What is the obsession with it?! Then when you do say it’s going well they’re desperate for it to be going badly and say ‘oh just wait for…’ so you never quite think you’re out of the woods and some awful tidal wave is about to hit you at any moment 🙄

People continually mentioning when we’d be having another and the sort of weird implication that because I had a boy, I’d want another to have a girl 🤔 Oh right, I’ll just sit this one aside shall I? I have literally just grown a human, the last thing I’m interested in is considering growing another!!

My in laws repeatedly announcing ‘he’s got wind’ every time they held him. Okay great, do you want some sort of award for knowing something about babies?!

Just say ‘yeah it’s cute’ and shut up!! 😂

It’s so shit! My friend had a girl and I had a boy, both first babies. When she was pregnant another friend said she hoped hers was a girl, while I’m just sort of awkwardly sat there pregnant with a boy like a second place prize or something. Then we were talking about someone who’d just had their third and it was the third boy. My friend said (without thinking I assume) ‘oh you’d just give up!’ and I just thought so you mean each time you think the person has been getting pregnant just to get this treasured prize of a girl and gets more disappointed with each boy? I hate it! It’s the way other people make you feel that’s the issue and this expectation that you must want a girl, I’d be delighted to have either if I have another and actually a boy would be great for a little friend for my son 🤷🏼‍♀️

I also think 'sleep when the baby sleeps' is good advice, if you don't have a reliable sleeper it is actually possible to go 24h with no or very little sleep if you're not careful so take it when you can. (My record was 24h with 3h sleep, I thought I was going to die, it did get better).

My first son is a spitting image of my husband and people would constantly apologise before stating that he looks like his Dad. I don't know what there is to apologise about, I obviously think DH has nice face, why would it be an issue if our children look like him?

DH and I are both vegetarian. We're happy for others to eat whatever they want but wouldn't want to have any in our home nor cook it ourselves. Despite knowing this, we've had a few people enquire whether DS eats meat. He's only 2 years old. Do they think he's sneaking out for a big Mac when we're not looking?

Midwife - “oh what a shame, it’s another boy”.

I had taken DS for a walk, swaddled sleeping in his pram, a few weeks old and someone came up and asked 'does you baby have arms?' since this was an adult not a child asking I was so surprised it was funny. But imagine how hurtful that could have been if he hadn't had arms.

I also had other mums ask what his strawberry mark was and if it was contagious at baby swimming.

And the hat thing. It was 27C and DS was about 6 months old so not even a newborn.

The concept of put the baby down 'drowsy but awake' makes we want to kick people in the shins.

Hahaha people were obsessed with telling us DS was ginger???? He was very clearly blonde and we wouldn’t of had a care what colour hair he had. I think people thought it wound us up but we genuinely didn’t care.

Someone said “at least DP NAME doesn’t have to worry who the dad is. Looks just like him”

@Bluedabadeeba THIS !!!!!!