Worst things people say/ask when you’ve had a child

[Wonderingmum77]

People say/ask such weird RANDOM things when you’ve had a baby. Some very very inconsiderate. I’ve just had one and I want to rant..

• after my c section my dad said “do you think you love your baby the same as he wasn’t born naturally”
• people ALWAYS want to know how much DC sleeps? And then seem disappointed when I say fine? Do u get a kick out of it if I say badly??
• sleep when the baby sleeps is the worst advice!
• Whenever DC makes a slight noise someone will go “HES HUNGRY”
• People comparing my DC to others. He was premie, so of course is v different to babies his age.
• people constantly telling me I need to be extra careful because DC was prem. he is now a thriving 11lb baby… if he wasn’t prem does that mean I could be less careful?
• the constant “is your baby warm enough” in 25 degree heat.
• When people say “oh he is so moany” when he makes a noise because he wants to be sat up looking around and they want to hold him like a little newborn,
• “in my day we done that and it was just fine….”
• the contradiction of “every baby is very different” and the guidelines of how to look after children are so regimented.

RANT OVER

We did rear facing til dc was 4. Pil every time they saw him getting in the car. "But if you have an accident he will probably break his leg" possibly but he won't have his brain shook or risk a broken neck!!

I have twins. I was asked several times "did you have sex twice in the same night then?"

Said twins are a boy and a girl. I was also asked several times "are they identical?"

I haven't yet had my baby - she's due very soon.
But when people have asked "what are you having?" And I've said a girl - so far 3 people have APOLOGISED to me!
Saying "having a girl is horrible" - "having a girl is so much trouble". Etc. I find it really bizarre.
They weren't joking. They looked genuinely gutted for me.

This all over.
My mother in law is always saying stuff like 'we used to add rice to milk' THAT WAS OVER 40 YEARS AGO CAROL! So I'm not going to go against current advice am I!

Oh and 'is she a good baby?' I always say yes quite proudly but it's actually a really weird question.

I'm so close to losing my shit sometimes. My mum asked me if I was heating up formula right and making it right. I said no, I go and Tesco and by the milks of the shelves and give it her nice and cold.... honestly! Losing the will. Someone once said hold her head I told her to fuck off I know how to hold my baby, and I've had a Karen tell me that she shouldn't be wearing a jacket in this heat... it was clouding and cold in the shade. So we all had hoodies and jackets on. I've stopped being polite and started biting back now... can't help it

My SIL rabbiting on about how I should get my tiny baby into a routine... i just wanted to tell her to mind her own business

I have twins and constantly constantly constantly get ‘Are they good?’ WHAT DOES THIS MEAN? They’re 6 months old so not answering me back or refusing to get up for school yet…

My mum in law and I have both heard "at least you know who the father is." And someone said to her when my DH was small "at least you'll have no trouble getting the maintenance" 😩 (since DH and FIL look so alike). MIL and FIL were and are very much still together!!

It does not stop when they are out of the baby stage either. Had a random man stop me yesterday and say ‘mum, the sun is in his eyes!!’ Erm, first of all don’t call me mum, second of all my son refuses to wear a hat, refuses to wear sunglasses, had repeatedly pulled the pushchair hood back every time I put it up so short of walking backwards with the pushchair up a hill there’s not much I could do at that point. I really hate how once you have a child you become public property and people feel they can tell you everything you are doing wrong.

Since DD was about six months old, until now (nearly 2):

"You're still breastfeeding? It's just for you now."

Course it is, Margaret. It's not because it's good for DD. It's purely because I love the perks such as carrying extra weight because my genes didn't get the memo that we're no longer starving peasants 😆

Now Ex-husband's boss (in a very people orientated profession) said "so, you've had sex then" when we announced we were expecting DS. Very strange.

Right after dd2 was born, dh bought me a lovely ring - I’d never had an engagement ring.
A neighbour said, ‘You got that for a girl?’
She was a non-Brit from a different culture, but still…..

A few things really rile me! More assumptions and comments than questions. They are:
"Typical boy" ... when my toddler does anything boisterous that girls would also happily do.
"Well I suppose you won't be having anymore children now that you've got one of each"... surprisingly I didn't have my second child because I wanted a girl, I wanted a second baby!
"Oh she's so cute, I mean your boy was cute too, but it's just different with little girls"... 🙄
"You need to get them on a bottle so that other people can look after them"

I was pregnant when asked, "Is it the same Baby Daddy as your first?" which is code for can you confirm you're a slag?
As it happens, no... no it wasn't the same 'Baby Daddy' as the first one. 😆

My friend: "Does he sleep through the night yet?"
Me: "No. He's five weeks old!"

Another thing which has really pissed me off... I keep getting asked "so are you going to have another one?"

At least let my stitches heal first before you ask me that Sally! 🙄🙄

I don't mind the comments on how I've clearly put my husband on a mega boil wash as my DS is his twin... as a PP has said, I like my husbands face 🤣🤣

Not to me, but I was on a bus once and a baby was crying. Loud mouthed bitch started shouting to everyone on the bus about how her children never cried or made a noise. I felt really sorry for mum of crying baby.

Sorry but that made me laugh 🤣🤣🤣 honestly some people!!

When I was leaving hospital for the first time after giving birth. I was trying to work out how to strap in baby seat to taxi. Driver told me to just shove my newborn baby in her seat into the footwell.

When you feed your baby with a bottle (or OMG worse, let the poor kid’s father do it) and immediately you get ‘why aren’t you breastfeeding? Through gritted teeth…maybe I can’t, maybe baby not gaining weight, maybe DH wants to be part of the feeding process, maybe I have no maternity and will be back at work very soon, maybe I simply don’t want to. All are valid and all have NOTHING to do with anyone else.

If my baby wasn't sleeping, he was usually crying. Every man, woman and dog diagnosed hunger. "Ahhh, is he hungry?"

"Yes, he is hungry - I prefer not to feed him as I just love carrying a crying baby round Asda."

Having children by different fathers doesn't make you a slag!

Relative: "Does he sleep well?"

Me: "Not really. He wakes up very quickly when he's on his own, he likes to be near us"

Relative: "You have to just let him cry. You're setting him up for a lifetime of being a cry baby if you don't. It's really important he learns how to settle on his own"

Me: "No it's not for me thank you, I wouldn't like it"

Relative: "No I could never do it either. Mine slept in with me and figured it out himself soon enough"

????!?! So what exactly was that lecture in aid of then?! I've had variations of this same conversation with multiple relatives now. I'm starting to think they just look for any excuse to give me a lecture.

I'm pregnant through IVF, lots of awfulness and heartache to get here etc. People can't get enough of smugly telling us how hard it will be when the baby is born and doesn't sleep. It's practically all they say. I'm looking forward to these other examples you've all shared 🤦🏻‍♀️

Eugh sleep when baby sleeps is all well and good until you have a baby that will only nap on you. So you can't really sleep with baby on you in case u squish baby or the baby falls off you.

Another is
"Oh could you not breast feed then?" No Susan I didn't want to and my baby is thriving.