Being envious of the lifestyle when going abroad...

[LittleMissUnreasonable]

Does anyone else feel like this too? I live in a very wet part of the UK and whenever I go abroad or meet people from abroad, the lifestyle always seems amazing. Examples below;

• Met a Canadian girl abroad in Spain. Very tanned and toned. She played volleyball for her college team and had long hair and am effortless beauty about her. Whereas near me, the only sports teams are tennis/football, most of which are difficult to play outside due to the weather
• visiting Italy, all the food seems beautiful. 80 year and old women whipping up delicious pasta in moments. Whereas in England, I just feel like we never have time to sit down and make proper nice food
• Spain, fresh tacos cooking constantly, beautiful women looking like they've stepped out of a magazine. In England often darting through the wind and rain to get to an office job, stuck inside and grabbing a sandwich from Boots for lunch.

I'm fully aware I'm seeing the world through tourist tinted glasses, but can anyone who lives abroad or knows of the lifestyles/ isn't from the UK please give me some tips on how people do this!! Any beauty tips, any easy amazing recipes. I'm aware I can't sit on a Parisian Street drinking wine and eating olives, but would just love some tips from some locals of how to bring a bit of it to the UK :)

Bump 😁

You're not comparing reality with reality

Yeah, and see when I think of England (after living abroad now for many years), I think of walking down to the local country pub on a sunny July afternoon. A few beers in the beer garden and a good wholesome English meal before wandering back to my perfect sun dabbled garden to enjoy the late evening sunshine. Ah bliss....this is easy isn't it! 😂

*sun dappled

Cream teas and picnics, never too warm, never too cold. Cycling/running year rpund outside. Canadian winters ans Spainish Summers are harsh. Now Itay..........one of the most misgynostic cultures in Europe.

Hi @LittleMissUnreasonable

I think you're right and I notice a lot of women from abroad who've made the UK their home have continued their 'glamorous' lifestyle here.

With regards appearance and looking like one has just stepped out of a magazine, I would venture the following...

The key thing seems to be about being consistently and impeccably groomed: hair, eyebrows, nails (clean, short, neutral colour)), a bit of 'natural' make-up. Clothes always clean, well-fitting, which starts with having the correct underwear, clothes tend to be close fitting, straight lines, all body parts covered (nothing hanging out) neutral colours. Having the correct shoes, outerwear and accessories curr the occasion and the rest of the outfit. All of these items are kept in a good state of repair, never any hint of fading/tiredness. Inevitably these women (and men) generally lead a healthy lifestyle with regards weight management and they make very conscious and consistent choices about the quality and quantity of food and drink they consume. They also all appear to have lovely teeth.

These women (and men) appear chic all the time, whether they're on the school run, on play dates, at the weekend, during the day - always impossibly 'put-together'.

To look this good all the time takes good routines, healthy habits, being organised, and a desire to always present the best version of oneself.

My mother-in-law, born and raised in Salford, Manchester is exactly the same in terms of adherence to being well groomed and well turned out. Her fashion choices are completely different and hair, nails and makeup also conform to a different aesthetic, however, she always looks put-together. This isn't a British vs Other world thing, however, I do tend to notice friends and associates raised in other countries tend towards to being more fastidious about this way of showing-up.

:)
For me, what you described is being home sick!
I have lived here for over 20 years, I am yet to eat a Boots sandwich 😂, you just don’t do that. I don’t make my own pasta, but I buy fresh pasta. Lidl and Eastern European shops for Greek olives, French cheeses, fresh seasonal vegetables and herbs etc. Cook with virgin olive oil, always. Sun dried tomatoes are much nicer than the tomatoes you buy in the supermarket. I cook a lot of Italian and Persian food. Pomegranate molasses and olive oil drizzled over any old salad makes it 10 times better. Sabrina Gayour is a good port of call.

Never buy disposable clothes. They look so good abroad because they’re good quality, they fit and they get ironed (I am aware I’m generalising here, but as a rule of thumb..)

Life is centred around socialising, not around work. Be it with family/friends. Even if it’s cold and wet, you can still have friends around, light some candles, play some music, get the game boards out.

I have been known to take annual leave because it’s sunny 🤷🏻‍♀️

HTH.

Lived abroad for a few years in two different countries.

Life wasn't really that different. We still had to go to work, juggle kids, do housework, fill the car with fuel....

But we might head to the beach nit the park.
Get serenaded by the Call to Prayer not traffic at dawn
Cicadas. Now that's a racket...
Had season tickets for a waterpark not s museum

Its definitely not a constant holiday.

OH was just commenting the other day on how scruffy everyone looks in the UK compared to abroad. Also we are just so much fatter than in the rest of Europe. In Italy, Greece and France women take far more trouble with their appearance and keep slim. Men wear lovely tailored clothes and polished shoes. In the more urban areas anyway.

Appearance used to matter a lot more once than it does now. Shoes should be polished, clothes ironed, things were supposed to fit properly. It was a mark of being respectable. No one cares anymore. We’ve become slovenly and scruffy as a nation.

Whenever I go abroad I think how shit the Uk is and it's mainly weather related. Warm sunny weather just makes food, scenery, people and experiences so much better.

Our grey drabness is so depressing.

It's something I think about too when I ( very rarely) go on holiday to warmer climes. I'm very conscious of my primark clothes, chub rub and sunburn.
But we have a beautiful green landscape, Morris dancers, wonderful marked seasons, the pomp and ceremony of things like the Changing of the Guards, breathtaking scenery in places, and quirky traditions - so there's lots to romanticise here.
Everything takes effort and a positive outlook and we're going through tough times so that's in short supply!

I’m from one of the countries you mention OP, have also lived in the UK and a few other European nations.

I both agree and disagree with what you say, mainly because even abroad people have the exact same issues, worries, lack of time to cook nice / do their eyebrows or sit in a cafe with wine and olives.

There is though a higher standard when it comes to appearance and housekeeping. I of course don’t speak for the whole of eg Spain vs whole of UK, but in general at home, you keep yourself looking respectable and you keep your house looking respectable.

Ironing. There is no debate as to whether one should iron or not. Clothes for going to the supermarket or the park are ironed. Your 2 year old’s play dress is ironed. Don’t get me started on uniforms - I was in shock the first time I saw a thread on here titled ‘do you iron your DC’s clothes’. Of course you do, I thought!

Everything should look and smell fresh. House aired every single morning. Clothes dried outside as much as possible (the weather helps). Fresh clothes on. Hair washed. Fresh make up, if you wear any. No fake tan, fake eyelashes, fake nails. Moody teenagers excluded

When you go out you are representing your household, family, community. There’s no place for scruffiness there.

That said, I’ve had plenty of scruffy days because you can’t look perfect all the time. But it’s a principle that’s engrained in your mind early on. Look presentable.

Cooking - this is regional and depends on the diet of course. If Mediterranean - everything cooked with olive oil, no other fats. Fresh salad every lunch AND dinner, all ages. Dinner isn’t until 9/10pm traditionally so there is time after work to cook fresh food and the whole family eats together. Eating is a whole sit down affair. Shop sandwiches don’t exist. You also don’t eat at your desk or on the bus. You take a proper lunch break and sit down with all your colleagues to share a 2/3 course meal. Children tend to have 1.5/2h lunch break. Those with a parent who’s free during those hours go home for lunch.

It's the weather. I moved away from the UK years ago, first to Ireland (even worse weather) and then to Australia. Some of life is more or less the same, you still have to work, we are not on holiday. But if you are a sun lover, life is just better when the sun is out, blue skies are infinitely more pleasant than grey! We often go to the beach, or drive to a vineyard for lunch, or if its very hot, just hang out by the pool. The UK and Ireland are lovely countries, but for me sunshine makes a huge difference to my quality of life.

I've lived abroad in a hot country.

The only difference between my life there and here was the weather!

I still had a job, house to run, child to raise etc.

I'm personally glad to be living somewhere where there isn't relentless pressure to "look chic" on the schoolrun and have a showcase home, and every meal is a handcrafted delight. Because guess who the workload falls on? Women.

I'm travelling solo through a hot Med country this week. I've done a lot of people watching! The British tourists stand out and look a mess because they're wearing holiday clothes. They're cheap, to be worn for one week with unrealistic expectations then binned, and the tourists aren't used to wearing them so aren't comfortable and confident in them. The locals are wearing their every day clothes, bought to make them feel good and of better quality. They look much more at ease. British tourists would look so much more chic if they stuck to their own happy clothes! If you wouldn't wear it the pub in Manchester, why wear it to the pub here?!

I don't really see where you're coming from OP. I live in the UK. DH and I are outdoorsy and sporty, so are fit and tanned. We eat 'real', nutritious, home cooked food every day. I've taken my own lunch to work (usually a nice salad) pretty much every day of my working life and have never grabbed a meal deal.

However, a couple of things about life in the UK are deeply at odds with what I've seen of life in Mediterranean countries:

• very few people here grow their own veg. Sure, some do. But in Italy EVERYONE with a patch of earth is growing something edible in it.
• the sickness of perpetual 'busyness'. When you ask if a friend wants to meet up for a coffee and they say they might be able to pencil you in in 4 months time. I think, overall, people here have lost their way with understanding what life is all about - and it's not killing yourself for 50 hours a week to pay for the leased Audi estate on your driveway!

I grew up in Sweden, then lived in Paris, Brussels, LA, and the UK, and it's different everywhere. Sweden is probably more like Canada with the outdoorsy lifestyle, that brings fit people with bundles of energy. Brussels more like the UK with the sandwich lunches but more of an European feel with the markets etc. Paris, just like you would envision Paris, chic, snobby, but lovely if you fit in. LA, my least favourite, limiting lifestyle, crowded, polluted, and quite scary at times. UK is very different to all these, and in particular because the people are the friendliest and funniest, and there is space for all sorts of people. I do wish it wasn't so wet, that the food was nicer, and that people used their bodies more and drove less, but overall it's not that bad.

Me too it sounds bloody exhausting!!

Love this ^

About the weather.....Its all very nice being in 30 degree heat when you have a swimming pool or can go to the beach everyday. But in real life I doubt many locals have pools and hours of free time to go to the beach. Instead you are left sweltering in unairconditioned homes/offices/shops in 30 degree heat...not as fun as it sounds.

Same shit, different bucket.

do you think foreign tourists don’t wander around London or Edinburgh and wonder how amazing it must be to eat scones all day and live in Harry Potter land?

i live abroad

it’s same shit, different climate - I still have to go to office, sort out my water bill etc.

Agree 100%.

Why is it "better" to be expected to look polished and glamorous every time you leave the house? Why can't I go to the shops in my joggers, hair back and no make up? Why does every trip out have to mean wearing lovely clothes, full face, blow dried hair and looking glamorous and Mediterranean? Bollocks to that.

I like the confidence, humour and personality of British women that they don't feel the constant need to impress others by looking amazing and polished all the time.

And what is wrong with a meal deal???

It's a sandwich and a bag of crisps. A perfectly adequate lunch for people who don't starve themselves or have restrictive and disordered eating.