Is it my imagination or are volunteers less forthcoming these days?

[Limesaregreen]

Have name changed. My youngest has left school now but I still get the odd call to 'help out'. Now when they were at school I was more than happy to help out, sat on the PTA at both primary and secondary, extra pair of hands on school trips, sports trips, school concerts, cycle proficiency etc. etc. as did loads of the other Mums and Dads whether they worked or not.
After my youngest left nursery, I heard that certain things that used to happen, no longer did in the same way (nursery eventually closed as no-one volunteered to be on the committee to run it). Cycling proficiency no longer happened after youngest left school as no-one wanted to get involved. Very few school trips seem to happen now and high school is struggling to get people to help for prom night and end of year show (hence the call).
I've said I'm not available. I've done my time and moved on and feel no guilt about that, it's for current parents to step up to the mark. But is this the new norm now??? What's it like for those still with kids at various ages in school??

That was my experience mbozn

mbosnz

I work and volunteer on a weekly basis whilst raising the kids with no help from wider family. It is tough but I think it is worth it. Sometimes, well quite often it all feels more than I can physically manage but I know it is worth it.

Other than people I volunteer with I don't know anyone else who volunteers. Except I guess the odd school event.

What I would say is my volunteer role is more full on and somehow seems to carry more responsibilities than my paid role. It's crazy everything that is expected. It also actually costs money, other than loss of time and energy it is money getting there or electricity and making sure I have a working computer at home and Internet.

Whilst I plan on keeping it up for the foreseeable future sadly I can't see me being able to sustain it forever.

As for our local brownies though. I took my daughter and all they did was board games and drawing and yet they charged 5-6 pounds for the hour. Around here you can pay that for your child to do a club where they can learn something new. I'm not sure at that price why it needs to be run by volunteers and not paid staff.

I volunteered to be part of the parent committee running the local preschool. It was awful. The parents seemed to forget they were dealing with their fellow working parents and spoke to us like shit. The (paid) playgroup staff spoke to us like shit. There was hours and hours worth of paperwork and hoops to jump through. It’s massively put me off. I vowed I would never volunteer again.

I agree that it’s often forgotten that volunteers are unpaid and giving up their time for free. If you aren’t treated well as a volunteer, why would you carry on. Everyone loses.

@Innocenta, you’re likely to find loads of charities that would love some admin support. Something you could do from home without any tight deadlines?
But volunteers who are a “bonus person” rather than in a key role can also be really helpful - so if you can’t be reliable you could still be a really great “extra bonus surprise” for whoever is organising. It should still be pleasant and sociable with people happy to see you when you can make it, rather than feeling they relied on you and you flaked the last time.

Who the bloody hell has time to volunteer these days? Maybe in the dark ages yes, but nowadays you have to work all the hours god sends just to make ends meet. Plus more families are single parent families now, so double the burden is on them. Continue to do your bit if you feel so strongly about volunteering

I have done various volunteer roles over the years - guiding people at national trust houses, assistant leader at a cub scout group, a charity trustee (small, unregistered) and other bits and bobs.

Honestly, I stopped doing most of them over the course of COVID, realised my life was much easier without them and am now volunteering for much lower effort things (4x a year committees instead of once a week or once a month).

I have run voluntary stuff for over a third of my life and I sort of feel like I have done my bit. If everyone was prepared to put in the time I've done we wouldn't have a shortage of volunteers, and I sort of feel there has to be a point at which I have contributed enough. I've always done it alongside a very demanding workload, and looking back I don't know how I coped honestly.

I used to work with some of the parents of children in an organisation i volunteered for (either guides or scouts ive done both i cant remember which)

I dared to book time off in the summer holidays and they complained that much to the manager i had a lot of pressure put on me to cancel, as I didnt have kids so I 'shouldnt get the time'

When we told the parents we could only run summer camp that year if one of them or a rota offered to come because we didnt have enough volunteers the same parents were outraged

They didnt like it when I pointed out that was what i had booked holiday for, apparently we should have just magiced a volunteer up in some way that didnt impact them

To be honest though ive stopped volunteering for childrens organisations because there is a perception that if I am childless and want to volunteer to work with children I must be a paedophile, it wasnt so much of an issue when I was younger but now I am of an age where its obvious there will be no children the little comments keep coming. My dh has stopped for the same reason

We have both volunteered for hours each week for years in the past but we wont bother again

I helped in primary but my kids wouldn't want me volunteering at their secondary. I would have felt the same at their age

That is really helpful to know, @Saz12 - thank you! I have already looked at our (we hope) new community and there does seem to be a good number of voluntary led organisations, so as we start to get our move organised I will try to figure out which ones to get in touch with. I'd really like to be more helpful rather than living mainly for myself.

I am on or have been involved as a volunteer in various local committees over the years and one of the complaints that come up periodically is that 'It's always the same faces!'. Any suggestion that new volunteers would be most enthusiastically welcomed is always met with 'oh, I'm too busy'. The Committee of a Gala Day a few towns over had been doing increasingly desperate shout outs for new volunteers and made it clear that if no - one stepped up, then the event would have to be cancelled as there just weren't enough volunteers and some people who had done it for years and years wanted to step down. No one stepped up so they put out a public statement saying that unfortunately, the event was cancelled which was met with widespread outrage.

I volunteer in three places weekly and enjoy it and am treated absolutely fine, but if I was treated badly like some people have mentioned then I would walk away. Just because someone volunteers for free doesn’t mean they can be treated any less and places are very unprofessional if they think they can get away with this.

I have quietly walked from the PTA who were a cliquey bunch of mums who made it very clear I wasn’t wanted for anything other than to be the workhorse donkey at events. Their loss as I had fairly extensive experience at my previous job being involved with the company’s global volunteering aims and could have been a useful contributor to ideas etc. Shame as I was looking forward to getting involved.

I’m a Section Leader at Beavers and I’ve not witnessed any parents being rude to the Leader but I’ve no doubt it happens. The Leader and Assistant Leader are assertive, dedicated women so I doubt they would take any shit from rude parents.

Women used to be able to retire at 60 through didn't they. That's a good age to then volunteer. That isn't the case now

I volunteered at a local school for over 10 years - long after my DCs had left. It stopped when Covid struck and I was told they'd be back in touch when things were back to normal. I'm still waiting to hear from them! I assume they no longer want my help.

Reading this has made me just email my DDs guide leader to say if they ever need a spare set of hands I’m free.

I wouldn’t touch PTA with a barge pole, used to help out for a number of years but it’s a bloody thankless task. Also it utterly pisses me off, I would happily pay more tax than attend a shitty pTA event. Seriously for all the money parents pay in PTA events we could just increase tax!!!

I volunteer for a national museum, and would recommend that. We are managed by dedicated staff, get the training and support we need, and every hour we give is logged and appreciated. It is properly structured and you can step up and down as the rest of life permits. I do a bit of training and prep at home, but even that time is logged, and I'm always being offered opportunities to get involved with interesting events, or to do additional training/develop my role.

I am a school governor and it has got really hard to recruit new governors since Covid. I don't blame people for not wanting to do it - everybody is burned out from doing their real jobs and dealing with the pandemic and the job is not a barrel of laughs.

I also volunteer for a national helpline which is brilliant - incredible care for volunteers, great training and generally a fantastic ethos which makes you feel really valued.

I used to volunteer for everything, alongside a stressful job. Then, during covid, I struggled badly with my mental health. I got to told her more resilient, to work on myself, that I should think about those who died and not be so selfish, that I should shut up about my problems, to think of others - I was actively suicidal at one point and had no access to mental health care because of covid.

The whole of society can go to hell before I will volunteer again to support people who contributed to a long period of extreme distress where I was treated like shit for not coping.

I volunteered for 2 years when my dd was at brownies....reason she went was to meet new friends but with me there it just didn't really happen. I don't send her to groups because l want to end up helping run them, nor do l wish to be made to feel guilty when l don't want to help.
Plus my paid job is my priority.

Who the bloody hell has time to volunteer these days?

Millions of people.
Fortunately.

Hmm. Well, I run a charitable project and we are fine for volunteers. People are given specific responsibilities and seem to like it as they keep coming back! But in the broader community it’s the same 10 people doing every voluntary project. They are all 70 or older.

how is that funny? During the day I’m at work, so couldn’t volunteer during the school day, then I pick my DC up from nursery, get home and put her to bed. The days I don’t work my toddler is with me. I guess I could volunteer at the weekend but to be honest I don’t want to give up the small amount of time I have to spend with my DH , friends and family. When (if!) I get to retire I’ll have plenty of time to volunteer but life’s too busy at the moment.

On our pta it’s made clear that I’m the right type of person - live in the wrong road. So I don’t volunteer where I’m not welcome.

I tried a charity shop (oxfam) too - I didn’t have enough professional references.

Most peoples are but we still lend a hand with kids activities or they don’t run.