If you consider yourself to have a ‘healthy’ relationship with alcohol…

[Cryingbutstilltrying]

…what does that actually mean, for you?
Previously I had no off switch for alcohol. If I started drinking I would easily drink a bottle of wine in an evening, every evening.
Before Christmas I stopped drinking. It wasn’t always easy. I allowed myself to drink over the holiday period and before I knew it I had slipped back into the old ways. So I stopped again, completely.
DH and I were given some champagne for our anniversary last month and we shared it at home, and I surprised myself by enjoying it but once it was gone, being fine with that. It was a special occasion.
So I’m now wondering, is this the sort of relationship most people have with alcohol? Where you can have a few glasses at a celebration happily and then not the rest of the time? So Christmas, birthdays, anniversaries. Maybe once a month?
If you consider your drinking to be ‘healthy’, as in, not a problem, how often do you drink?

I very rarely drink, I only drink socially really so when going out or when people are over and not even always then.

I think you can drink a lot more than I do and still be healthy, I just don't see the appeal of alcohol more than occasionally for myself. I currently haven't really drunk alcohol at all since November 2017, that is more to do with me having young children and pregnancies. I don't like to drink when I'm cosleeping as it isn't safe, and I don't like to drink when tired as it makes me feel awful.

I genuinely love a good gin or a sherry or a cocktail. Or an icey cold pint on a hot day.

But I generally only have one possibly 2 drinks a week and usually only one day a week. I can't be arsed to have more as I'd rather have a tea and I can't cope with the hangover. I've been drunk 3 times since I had kids and they are at secondary now

I enjoy some alcohol occasionally, and drink at home as well as when I’m out. I think I have a healthy relationship with alcohol, though.

I never crave it. I don’t spend time thinking about wanting a drink, or when I can next have one.

I can easily drink half of my glass of wine and then not finish it.

I dislike being drunk and I make a conscious effort to avoid it.

Bottle of beer or cider on a Friday and Saturday.
20 yrs ago fri/sat/sun would easily be a 30 pint weekend.

I've had 3 G&Ts this year and 2 pints of shandy. That'll probably do me until 2023 . I'm just not bothered, lots of booze in the house and DH makes mead and exploding cider so there really is a lot of it. I don't like sweet drinks so stick to black tea or water. I'm dull as fuck in the drinking dept!

Some evenings I’ll fancy a glass of wine,
so I’ll have a glass of wine. Other nights, I won’t. Very rarely I’ll fancy two glasses, and I’ll have them. Usually I’ll just have one because having a thick head the next day isn’t worth it. Or I might have a G&T, or maybe a beer. It’s basically something that I like, but I don’t need or crave it. Last time I got actually drunk was about five years ago at a wedding and although I had a lot of fun, the next day I felt appalling, so I won’t be doing that again. It just isn’t worth it.

I think I do. I rarely drink. I didn't drink from new years eve until my birthday a few weeks ago. I've had a few weekends out on the trot though since (weddings etc.) Which isn't the norm for me. I probably won't drink now for a month or so. I can happily have a night out and not drink. The older I've gotten, the less I like drinking.

Glass of wine most evenings. It honestly is a small glass! Usually one or two nights a week without wine, but sometimes not. Occasionally, I'll have a second glass. I might drink more when with a group of people, but rarely more than the equivalent of two glasses.

Crisps, chocolate, desserts, sugary stuff once a week if that..

This is really interesting, thank you for your thoughts!
I find I still think about alcohol a lot, as in ‘no you’re not drinking, remember, go make a cuppa instead’ and I’m very aware of there being a wedding in the summer that I want to drink at (though family so not likely to be raucous, lots of kids about). So it’s still on my mind and has to be a conscious decision to avoid.
I think this means I’m not really ready to consider drinking on any sort of regular basis.

I work weekends and have to take kids to school in the week so don’t have a natural break where I think a drink fits though, that’s how it crept up to every night. And because I could always still function, never drank to get drunk and never ever drove while drunk, I didn’t see it for the problem it was. I think I’ve been roaring drunk twice in my life as a student and I don’t ever want to experience that again!

The comparison to chocolate and cake etc is interesting. I don’t have a sweet tooth at all! I can have those things in the house for the kids and not touch them, not even think about them. I would love to get to that point with alcohol. As it stands, if it was in the house I would drink it.

I like the idea of having a drink more than l like the actual drink.
Could honestly go for months without a drink - wouldn't even cross my mind to feel like lnwas depriving myself. If only l could say the same about cake!!

It's an interesting thread OP, I wish I felt the same way about chocolate as I do about alcohol - I expect I'd be a lot thinner then .

I can take or leave it, at home and out. I got drunk once last year at a Christmas party (not drunk enough to have a hangover). I enjoy a drink and like the way it makes me feel, but I don't crave that feeling and I usually have no more than two drinks.

I quite like a bit of alcohol but i don't like more. I most like it when I'm tired because it takes edge off the fatigue. One drink is lovely but that's it. Maybe 3-4 evenings/week. I reckon I do have susceptibility to alcoholism, actually, but it's moderated for now. it's definitely my vice, I fully believe it's toxic.

Friend & DH are more obviously healthy with booze: they drink only very very occasionally, almost as a curiousity, like one drink once every 3-6 months. They just aren't interested.

I think that's the 'unhealthy' bit - not being able to have alcohol in the house without thinking about drinking it.

It may be that you can't switch that off, but you can continue as you are in terms of acting more healthily around alcohol.

Sounds like you're doing really, really well at the moment!

I never drink at home, I might have one glass of wine if I go out for dinner, but if I don't fancy it, I'm happy with water.

As it stands, if it was in the house I would drink it

Sadly, the same is true for me, OP. I could have ten boxes of chocolates in the house, and they wouldn't even cross my mind. I am at least aware that this is a problem.

Unlike PP, I'd be delighted if sweet things were my undoing!

I drink alcohol because I love the stuff. A pint of ale down the pub, a weissbier with a curry, Rioja with roast lamb and so on.

The way I control my consumption is that I do not drink alcohol between bedtime on Sunday & 6pm on Friday. Full stop.

Yes, you’ve found your poison. You’re just going to have to be very intentional about your consumption, in the way that other people have to be intentional about exercising to keep bones strong; restricting sugar intake to keep diabetes in check; restricting high fat/kcal food to keep weight down etc.

Most people have something they can’t have as much of as they want, for their physical or mental health. Yours seems to be alcohol. You know what you need to do, at least, and that you can do it!

I have a healthy relationship with alcohol now, but I didn't always. In my 20s, like a lot of people, I was a binge drinker. All that changed with having kids though and now I can take it or leave it.

We have lots of wine and spirits in the house, but weeks go by when I don't drink a drop. Sometimes, I'll open a bottle of wine because I fancy a glass, but I'd only have more than one if we have people over and I often find that a couple of mouthfuls is all I want and end up tipping the rest down the sink. If I go out, I'll have one or two, but then switch to sparkling water.

I just don't want to drink alcohol any more. It makes me feel like shit afterwards and I don't want to feel like shit! I want to sleep well, get up feeling decent and my health and fitness are really important to me now, in a way they weren't when I was younger. I exercise 3-4 times a week and I just can't do that if I'm hungover. It's a case of priorities and feeling good always wins out these days.

I overdid it before I was 18, the idea being, once it was legal it was boring. University was such a disappointment though I joined in with drinking too much. Now I am alone as an adult, I can happily spend a fortnight drinking a bottle of beer. Most of that time involves thinking about whether or not I feel like drinking it.

I drink when I want. Sometimes that's 5 nights in a row, such as if we're on holiday and sometimes that's not for several weeks. Dry January wouldn't be a challenge for me. I can have one drink and stop. I don't drink every weekend. I don't drink because I've had a hard day, a good day etc. I have no emotional relationship with food.

This is something natural to me, not something I have to work at.

I am virtually T- total after giving up alcohol when I went on a very strict diet some years ago.
Just as well as I was diagnosed with liver problems early 2021!
I am appalled at the amount some of my friends drink, they are all in their 60's and I can't help thinking it can't be good for them.

I only ever have one drink at a time. More than one means I sleep badly, feel thirsty and usually get a headache. Add childcare to the mix and it's just not worth it.

There are so many lovely non alcoholic drinks out there that I don't find it a deprivation. I'd take an appletiser over a second glass of wine!

Ive always enjoyed alcohol, but I will happily go months without so much as a mouthful of wine. Like most people, I certainly had many a drunken night out most weeks as a teenager and student etc....Still do occasionally. But as much as I enjoy it, and as much as I enjoy getting drunk occasionally, I can take it or leave it.

I see no shame in "drinking alone" but then, I've never had a problem with alcohol and a glass or two to myself in the evenings if I want it is nothing to worry about. I've never felt the need to hide that I've had a drink or that I want one etc. (Although my parents don't know how drunk I used to get as a student!)

I'd drink more frequently than I do if I didn't live rurally and need to drive everywhere!

As for childhood experiences...I was allowed a small glass of wine with dinner from early teens like the French do. Never saw my parents drunk. Alcohol was just something you enjoyed in moderation, like puddings.

Last couple of years, I could probably count the number of drinks I've had on my fingers.

I very rarely drink at home- maybe a cider in the garden if it's hot. Or a drop of something in my coffee at Christmas.

I drink socially- special occasions, parties, with friends at the pub or at their houses. I'll have maybe 4-5 drinks (often gin and lemonade) and when I feel I've had enough I stop. I guess that counts as binge drinking?! It obviously varies but I'd say it's maybe 8-10 times a year at most.