Most annoying/ outrageous FB posts/people

[Narwhalelife]

Just some fun - I always want to delete FB but some of the above keeps me hooked!

My pet peeves….

• tagging in at hospitals and it’s is 100% nothing
• Any post that contains the phrase ‘making memories’
• ‘My Monday view’ and it’s usually a pool or beach - you are on holiday, you are not Jeff Bezos
• Any photos of a poorly child coughing, crying, having been sick - usually with a lengthy text about how ill their child is ‘temp spiking 45degrees’ and all the comments suggest A&E to which OP will play down and ‘hope it’s nothing’ 😑
• my MiL sharing posts of lost dogs (from Romania or the USA) he ain’t going to be up the park near us.
• Anything that starts ‘share if you agree’
• seasonal post Christmas trees with presents or just trees, trust me they all look alike I have the same bastard thing in my alcove to look at

let’s have them!!

Not so much posts, but comments on facebook missing persons posts, hundreds of 🙏 prayers will NOT bloody help, share the missing poster ffs.

"Absolutely fummin "

"PM me hun"

🤣🤣🤣🤣

Oh, now I've been on facebook and thought of another.

When people post a question, something like "can anyone recommend local vets. Cat very poorly". Then they'll chose one of those awful cartoony figures as a background holding a bloody birthday cake and balloons.

The scam ones that people fall for that are ALWAYS centre parcs

Profile doesn't have a blue tick and the post is something like
'Stacey Smith our original winner can not be contacted so we are giving away her free weekend at longleat... type win below and click onto our website to register

Cue loads of people commenting with various sob stories

As it's public post I see so many of my friends comment on these are they are so obviously fake. It irrationally annoys me!!

Tagging self (again) at children's A&E with the status "I'm so worried about my baby girl. Mummy loves you baby". When asked by others what is wrong with said child, no reply - EVER. Pretty sure said baby won't be reading FB to know "mummy loves you" either. Tell your child that, not the whole of FB.

Fucking Wordle. Not one friend but six. Blocked from seeing that crap for another 30 days...

Unnecessarily long statuses about "never getting to the bottom of the laundry basket". Duuuuuude, only you and your 10 year old son live there and you WFH part time. In the time it has taken you to have a mammoth rant about it, you could have done seven loads AND got them all dry.

The usual suspect on yet another night out, at soft play, swimming, ice skating, trampolining, cinema, restaurant etc etc almost every single day. REALLY nice to see you happy and enjoying yourself but since when have NHS nurses been paid the salary of a multi billionaire? They should be... but that's another debate for another day.

The ones that get my goat are the job ads...a company will post an ad saying something like......'Best Ever Hotel needs housekeeper...15 hours a week...£10 per hour....please call Susan on 012345678 to apply'
Cue a load of people writing 'interested' in the comments....whats the bloody point...just ring Susan on the number provided.

The ones that annoy me are on my hobby groups. Someone will ask for pricing advice on something they want to sell. Cue a dozen people saying ‘interested’. Yeah, that’s really helpful. And against group rules.

My mates sister is unbearable irl but when she got pregnant was the worst
1st baby-every single ailment was up on fb
every bloody day,there was a new picture of her bump #gettingbigger #6weekstogo
endless pictures of her in labour-really didn’t need to see that-I’m just grateful that they where her face shots
endless pictures of baby growing-when I know for a fact she dumped baby onto her mother and only bothered for the cute mummy and baby pictures

baby no2-as above but once baby was born,she’d reshare all the old memories of both children from the day she found out she was pregnant along with #smashingit #soblessed #makingmemories #bossingit #borntobeamummy

i unfriended her-even her family got sick of it,and when she asked why,I told her
cue loads of ‘you know who your real friends are’ and ‘snakes in the grass’ statuses
she was never my friend-I was mates with her older sister!
honest to god,i saw more of her sprogs than I did my own!

An advert for a small business selling a niche product that, actually, might interest me.

Scroll through dozens of comments to read "How much are these please?" to which the small business owner replies to every single one "will PM you". Just tell us the bloody price already! Moves swiftly on without purchasing... another potential customer lost.

The "so ill to do anything all week, dosed to the eyeballs on painkillers blah blah blah seeking sympathy".....miraculously better by Fri/Sat night to go out and get pissed to the eyeballs.
"There's a cat in my garden". Yes, its a fooking cat that's what they do!

No-one's mentioned my top annoyance yet surprisingly! After Christmas or a birthday posting a photo of their presents and the comment " The boy did good". 🤮

Any post with lots of # … #makingmemories etc … I cba reading them. Anything ‘I will know who my friends are if they repost’ - delete me.

The scam ones piss me off too....'we are giving away this top of the range camper van'.....yeah course you are....scary thing is some of my friends comnent or share the post thinking its real.

A new one I keep seeing.. 'And just like that..' insert child's birthday or anniversary post here

Any picture of a pub with people and drinks ‘living my best life’, ‘best night ever’. I couldn’t care less. Mundane updates. Why, just why?

"precious" usually as a response to a cute baby pic. Makes me shudder

I have come to the conclusion that most people in FB groups (of celebrities and bands etc) are crazy stalkers and should not be let within a mile of the subject matter of the group.

Those manipulative ones where people write that only their real friends will forward this. And you know who you are. I hate them, and never forward. Just F off.

Pity posts being shared where someone has found a random picture of a person with a disability and they say 'it's my birthday, I bet I don't get any likes' usually a photo of a baby with hydrocephalus or a woman with only one leg or a soldier in a wheelchair and thousands of brain dead people have shared it and have left happy birthday comments!

Or the photo of a puppy with one blue eye and one brown eye with the caption, 'I'm ugly, I bet no one likes my picture'!

Ha! I'm friends with one of my old uni lecturors on FB. He's a clinical psychologist, CBT therapist and trained hypnotist.

Just a few days ago, he put this pic on FB...

If you post something, say in a clothing group
Like "got this top from next, really flattering, loads of colours and was £15"

Comments underneath
How much was it hun?
Where from?
Ohh did they have any other colours?

READ the damn post

There was a scam one on my feed the other day because a supposedly very intelligent friend had commented on it.

It was meant to be on of the big supermarkets giving away x amount of shopping to 100 people and you just had to type 'done' in the comments.
Under every comment, the page 'owner' put "now you just have to click the link and fill in your details to complete".

You only have to go on the Facebook page to see that there are no other posts at all other than the scam one. Fools.

Putting up pictures of every single food their child/teenager makes eg biscuits, cupcakes, milkshake. Every single achievement eg singing certificate, swimming class and so on. Wishing their child a happy birthday saying something along the lines of ‘to my gorgeous, talented, clever child’. And then people feel like they have to wish and the mother replies ‘thank you’ pretending they are typed by child.
I have a couple of friends like this. They seem to think Facebook is for showing off their children.

This will make me sound heartless but the pictures of people crying with the comment 'this was me at my worst last year'. Why in that moment did you get a camera out and take a picture of yourself?

My Facebook feed is pictures of cats, dogs, frogs, capybaras, skunks, possums, horses, goats, pigs, angry hens... I have been carefully blocking any bullshit that I'm not interested in and now it's 95% animal, 5% human, it's great.