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Original poster

When you had your babies

96 replies

SuperSocks · 10/04/2022 19:03

Assuming you weren't estranged, when did you get in touch with your families to share pics/the birth story/baby's name? My brother's baby was born last night but I only know about it because my mum told me, and she hasn't seen pics or talked with them or anything. Is that normal?

OP posts:
GeorgieTheGorgeousGoat · 10/04/2022 19:06

Is the mother and baby both well would be my first thought?

We shared straight away but my kids are old so pre WhatsApp etc.

BananaBender · 10/04/2022 19:09

Yes that’s normal. Depends on how well the mum is, how well the baby is, how busy they are with medical checks with various medical people, etc.

Keha · 10/04/2022 19:09

My parents and in laws knew I was in labour. Told them baby safely here and very brief details within a couple of hours of birth (so they knew we were okay!) and they told siblings. My DH probably sent photo but I was out of it. DM and DMiL visited next day. Told friends/wider family over next 24/48 hours, but didn't have a name and was quite brief details and one or two pics.

Keha · 10/04/2022 19:12

I assume your DM had a whatsapp/text. My DH rang both sets of parents, but it is a very full on time and you can easily loose track of things. I think it's reasonably to let people know you are safe and well quickly, but not necessarily much more.

Ginsmything · 10/04/2022 19:12

My dh used the pay phone in the hospital to let our parents know both times and they would have let the rest of the family know i expect. Back in the old days before mobile phones and social media.Cheaper to let others pass on the news 🤣

elevatorboots · 10/04/2022 19:14

I had an ELCS so I messaged my mum to let her know I was going down to theatre then sent pictures and stuff to my mum/sibling when I was in recovery. DH took care of notifying his family which was a little bit later on.

SickAndTiredAgain · 10/04/2022 19:17

A brief update within a few hours of DD being born - just a quick “baby’s here, she’s called x, weighs y”.

Pics and details probably the day after - not out of any deliberate attempt to delay it or anything, just that I’d had a PPH, was exhausted, and we were just preoccupied.

WithANameLikeDaniCalifornia · 10/04/2022 19:17

Do you have children, op? If you do, did you spend the first 24 hours of your child's life texting your "birth story" to all your relatives? Or did you focus on holding and bonding with your baby?

Aspidistra1 · 10/04/2022 19:17

I had a lovely straightforward delivery and phoned parents quite soon afterwards, had started whatsapping a few pics and announcing more widely within a couple of hours. Then DS became really sick within the first 24 hours and had the weird combination of not having told some people and it being a bigger situation to share than it had been and having to update people with the change in circumstances. Let them go at their own pace and hope they’re ok.

MrsTimRiggins · 10/04/2022 19:21

We’d rang or sent messages to our parents, siblings and best friends within a few hours of my c-section. Husband did most of them as it was during covid times and he was only alllwed with me for an hour after our boy was born before coming back later for an hour so it was nice for him to have that to do if that makes sense?
It’s very personal tho, don’t read too much into it! Sharing the birth story, particularly, isn’t something I really did!

Original poster
SuperSocks · 10/04/2022 19:22

@WithANameLikeDaniCalifornia

Do you have children, op? If you do, did you spend the first 24 hours of your child's life texting your "birth story" to all your relatives? Or did you focus on holding and bonding with your baby?
No, I don't, hence posting here to ask what's the norm! But I would want to talk to my mum that day, because I love her and want to include her/have her support/offload some of the stress. I don't see why snuggling the newborn and talking on the phone for 10 minutes have to be mutually exclusive?
OP posts:
Hugasauras · 10/04/2022 19:28

Within a few hours of birth. DD was born at 5am, I messaged my mum at 6am from recovery asking if she was up, she was, so I rang her. Best friend, dad, gran, etc. were sent pics and details when I got to postnatal ward later that morning. I was so excited to tell everyone Grin

SarahAndQuack · 10/04/2022 19:28

Very normal IME.

If someone has a very straightforward labour they might post pics the same day/day after, or they might not. But it's not unusual you're still in hospital for a few hours or a day or so after you have the baby (and hospital wifi is often shit), and then everyone is shattered.

Snuggling a newborn and taking photos is actually surprisingly hard (esp if it's your first/you're trying to establish feeding) because you don't have three hands, and someone who's just given birth is going to be sore and not keen on scootching around to get an angle on a photo.

When DD was born I wasn't even the one in labour and I did ring my mum and DP's mum the same day, but honestly, I wasn't that coherent and I would say real news took a few days to come through. Same with most people I've known. Either nothing or a quick 'we had the baby!' FB post with a picture of mum looking dazed, then a looonnngg silence while the dust settles!

Furrbabymama87 · 10/04/2022 19:29

Straight after. I know my mum would be worried sick if she never heard anything from me or my husband. I never messaged everyone individually but I at least told my mum and my husband told his side of the family. That way everyone knows.

Aroundtheworldin80moves · 10/04/2022 19:33

Parents knew straight away both times.
DD2... all everyone but parents knew for 24hrs was baby had been born safely as I wasn't sharing photos or name until I had been in contact with DH and he had seen the photo. (Army). (So in fact the Welfare officer and clerk knew before him but again no details!)

Wnkingawalrus · 10/04/2022 19:33

@WithANameLikeDaniCalifornia

Do you have children, op? If you do, did you spend the first 24 hours of your child's life texting your "birth story" to all your relatives? Or did you focus on holding and bonding with your baby?
It’s pretty easy to hold a newborn in one arm and a phone in the other. And newborns sleep a hell of a lot, especially the first few days. Assuming no issues I think it’s pretty common for lots of new mums to be sending a few texts, I know I was. Pretty sure it didn’t effect the bonding.
cheesypoporstar · 10/04/2022 19:33

I don't think it's normal.

And I've had a 23 weeker. People knew of her arrival within about 25 mins after she was born, name included

Feather12 · 10/04/2022 19:34

@WithANameLikeDaniCalifornia

Do you have children, op? If you do, did you spend the first 24 hours of your child's life texting your "birth story" to all your relatives? Or did you focus on holding and bonding with your baby?
You can hold and bond with your baby with other people there. I had my babies before social media so I phoned everyone when I went into labour so they could come to the hospital and wait, they then saw the baby within 30 minutes of birth, I was just so excited to share my happy news. So I would say that your brother’s situation is far from typical OP.
Madrenetterhere · 10/04/2022 19:34

Yes normal surely you understand nit everybody feels and thinks like u ?

SarahAndQuack · 10/04/2022 19:41

You can hold and bond with your baby with other people there. I had my babies before social media so I phoned everyone when I went into labour so they could come to the hospital and wait, they then saw the baby within 30 minutes of birth, I was just so excited to share my happy news. So I would say that your brother’s situation is far from typical OP.

But it's not that uncommon for labour with a first baby to take a while, is it? I don't know the stats but surely, it must quite unusual to be able to guarantee having a baby at a sociable enough time of day that family could come to the hospital and wait, and you give birth before they have to go again? It sounds absolutely lovely, but I would think you were lucky!

In our NCT class I think only one person had a labour that began and ended the same day and didn't involve the mum or the baby having to stay in hospital. DP went in on Thursday for induction and DD wasn't born til Sunday morning.

stairgates · 10/04/2022 19:43

Is it his and hers first baby?

Wnkingawalrus · 10/04/2022 19:43

In terms of the formal comms, OH called both sets of parents within a couple of hours of coming out of theatre. I think he also called our brothers and sisters after DC1 but can’t remember after DC2. There were no post birth issues for me or either of the DC which obviously made things easier. My parents visited the next day with DC1 but later the same day with DC2 as they were already staying down to look after DC1. In laws visited a couple of days later with both.

To be honest both of us were really excited to tell people asap. I’d text most of my team at work within a few hours of DC1 being born. Can remember it so clearly because they were all on a night out that I said I would go to if the baby hadn’t arrived yet (it was due date!).

mizzo · 10/04/2022 19:47

I had my first two long enough ago that coins for the pay phone, birth announcements and stamps were on the hospital bag list.

Feather12 · 10/04/2022 19:54

Yes, I was very lucky SarahAndQuack but I still would have let them know either way. My house was 5 minutes from the hospital so they also spent time there. I just knew I wanted to share/show off my babies immediately. I don’t know how I would have felt if things had gone wrong though, which is why that would always be my first thought if I didn’t hear anything.

Dreamworks · 10/04/2022 19:55

My mum was with my and DP for our first and we text PIL when I was back on the ward. I phoned SIL from the delivery suite once I'd eaten/showered. I text my best friends very shortly after and then went on social media a few hours later once my dad had met him.

I'm going in to be induced this week and as soon as I am able to after birth I will be on the phone with my mum since she can't come with us and she will have hourly updates of what's occurring!