When did it become socially acceptable to have a baby without being married?

[Lambsandchicks]

1990s? Or before that? Any history/sociology experts around?

This is really interesting.
If it’s 80s then I wonder why? I know it’ll slowly have become more and more normal over time, but why did it start then? Was there a change in law?

Perhaps all the 50s and 60s babies were starting to have kids and they were used to rebelling against baby boomers. Also wide use of contraception meant more non marital relationships and therefore more accidental pregnancies perhaps?

@CornishGem1975

Most of my very large Catholic family had babies outside of marriage in the 80s and onwards. Nobody batted anything.

Whereas in my family nobody did until one of my mother's cousins in the 90s and my DGM didn't tell DM about it because she was ashamed. It was clear by then that my DGM's attitude was not the norm for everyone, but it was the norm for someone born before 1920.

Now in my own generation, many if not most of my second cousins have had children without being married, but it was definitely not the case in the 80s.

(We are non-conformists originally, but I suspect not in the same was as Little Angel).

My cousins definitely had babies in the 80s as late teens outside of marriage, nobody seemed to mind really but my great grandma, very much head of a big family was pretty easy going.

My own grandparents were definitely expecting when they walked down the aisle in the 40s but had been together since age 13 so were probably always going to get married.

When I felt pregnant at 17, I had an abortion despite nobody being bothered in my wider family I didn't think I'd have any support from my parents. (Not both Catholic)

@BiscuitLover3678

This is really interesting. If it’s 80s then I wonder why? I know it’ll slowly have become more and more normal over time, but why did it start then? Was there a change in law?

Perhaps all the 50s and 60s babies were starting to have kids and they were used to rebelling against baby boomers. Also wide use of contraception meant more non marital relationships and therefore more accidental pregnancies perhaps?

I remember there being a push back from some older people against the idea of marrying young, many had done so and regretted it and didn't want their children to do so. And so by extension the idea that if you were pregnant a wedding should occur and this would be supported (even pressured) by both extended families was no longer a given.

@BiscuitLover3678

This is really interesting. If it’s 80s then I wonder why? I know it’ll slowly have become more and more normal over time, but why did it start then? Was there a change in law?

Perhaps all the 50s and 60s babies were starting to have kids and they were used to rebelling against baby boomers. Also wide use of contraception meant more non marital relationships and therefore more accidental pregnancies perhaps?

Surely women having kids in the 80s were the Baby Boomers. I am one myself.

@CaptainMyCaptain sorry I meant they were the baby boomers

I had ds in early 2000 me and dh weren't married then, oh plus I was 18. I can honestly say society was horrible to me and my child. This was central Scotland.

Mostly in the 1980s

"Surely women having kids in the 80s were the Baby Boomers. "

Yes.

Generation X started in 64/5. So a lot of babies on the 80’s were born to Gen x not just Baby Boomers.

@ArseInTheCoOpWindow

Generation X started in 64/5. So a lot of babies on the 80’s were born to Gen x not just Baby Boomers.

They would have been 15 in 1980. A decade is a long time so, yes, during the 80s they would be having babies but most in the early 80s would be baby Boomers like me, born 1955. Anyway, that's what that poster has now said she meant. The Boomers were the rebellious generation - mods and rockers, hippies, skinheads, punks, new romantics.

When I was heavily pregnant with my daughter in 1993, me and my partner went home to see his parents and I got lots of disapproving glances directed at my naked ring finger. After I had our son we did get married and after the register office ceremony; the registrar beckoned us into her office, banged the door shut and said in ringing tones with no preamble: “Your children are illegitimate. If you want them to be legitimate you will need to get them re-registered.” We got out of there as quickly as possible (we had the children with us at the time). We lived in a part of the country where it was very usual to have kids and not be married.
I kept my surname which annoyed my father who gave me Christmas present cheques made out to a mythical Mrs with my husband’s name, and he did it year after year in spite of explanations and continued to do it after my husband died. Some people resist moving with the times to the point of idiocy and well beyond.

I think the baby boom generation was actually something like 1945-1965, it thereabouts.
They would have had kids from the 70-90s in that case.
People generally had children younger than they do now now, even going back to the 1990s. I think having kids after 35 for women wasn’t that common until 20 yers ago or so..

@Hearwego

I think the baby boom generation was actually something like 1945-1965, it thereabouts. They would have had kids from the 70-90s in that case. People generally had children younger than they do now now, even going back to the 1990s. I think having kids after 35 for women wasn’t that common until 20 yers ago or so..

Women had children throughout their fertile lives. My DGM had her last child at 47 in 1967.

@ArseInTheCoOpWindow good for you!
Now I went the traditional route but ended up bringing up three kids on my own so I’ve found conformity very overrated! 😀 Let’s wear purple and be crazy rebels 💃🏼

Oh for goodness sake Blossomtoes I was the baby I know how my parents were treated! My mum told me alot of things about my birth and early years and about her relationships with people. I was told about my dad's violence to her, my grandparents how they looked after me when she worked, when she married another man when I was 3 years old and how I was accepted by his family too. Sorry but it may have been awful for other families but it wasn't for mine in that respect. Obviously escaping a violent man and then marrying a paedophile (as it turned out) wasn't the best of times but as for having me out of wedlock wasn't ever mentioned!

Women had children throughout their fertile lives. My DGM had her last child at 47 in 1967.

She was extremely unusual.

www.statista.com/statistics/294594/mother-average-age-at-childbirth-england-and-wales-by-child-number/

My ex-MIL had her second child aged 45 in 1946

I don't mean MIL. I mean GIL.

[quote Blossomtoes]Women had children throughout their fertile lives. My DGM had her last child at 47 in 1967.

She was extremely unusual.

www.statista.com/statistics/294594/mother-average-age-at-childbirth-england-and-wales-by-child-number/[/quote]

She may have been, but in the absence of reliable contraception, women had babies until they either:
A) died
B) went through the menopause; or
C) their husbands lost interest in them.

It always annoys me when people say "women are having babies later", because in fact what's changed is that women are having first babies later.

it always annoys me when people say "women are having babies later", because in fact what's changed is that women are having first babies later

Had you bothered to click on the link, you’d see it’s first, second, third and fourth babies. My gran (born 1887), she had her first at 22 and her last (7th) at 34. Condoms were used thereafter.

Women had children throughout their fertile lives. My DGM had her last child at 47 in 1967.**

Ok, but that wasn’t very common, and still isn’t even now.

I did click on the link, @Blossomtoes. Why so grumpy?

@WeNeedSirSamuelVimesOnTheCase

I did click on the link, *@Blossomtoes*. Why so grumpy?

Because you said it always annoys me when people say "women are having babies later", because in fact what's changed is that women are having first babies later

The graph you see if you click on the link makes it abundantly clear that it’s not just first babies. 🤷‍♀️

What's not just first babies?

Also, why am I not allowed to be annoyed by what annoys me?