Taking kids to parents evening

[bigyellowTpot]

Just that really, Do you take your kids to parents evening? I never have but now my year 9 dd is adamant she wants to come to parents evening next week as she wants to know what her teachers are going to say about her. I have said no as teachers may not feel comfortable talking openly about her while she is present. she is now not happy as all her friends are going with their parents apparently. I don't care and she's still not going but do other MNetters take their dc along??

My son is a teacher and the pupils always attend parents evening

Ex teacher here.

Always preferred it when pupils attended too.

Year 7 onwards, pupils normally attend with parents

Always do. My childrens’ schools actively encourage it. I would take them anyway tbh. It’s good for them to hear praise/ concerns/ feedback from their teachers.

yea take the student but not younger siblings. they are always a massive distraction to everyone

teacher here - meant to also say i like to see student with their parents

Primary teacher here, if a parent arrives with their child I ask the child to wait outside the classroom.

Have done in every school I’ve worked in, as have all of my colleagues.

Surely the kids will just sit outside the classroom whilst the parents/teachers chat. Pre covid DS would come with us, the teachers set up an area outside the classroom where you would view your child’s work whilst you wait. When we were called into the classroom DS just sat outside for 10 mins or so.

Yes I think children generally attend. I would expect if they had something sensitive that they needed to raise with you away from your child that they would have already contacted you to discuss this.

@Floralnomad oh right I thought teachers preferred the children not to be there I know that was the case when my dd was in primary school, obviously they'd make exception if parents didn't have child care but even then the child would wait outside the classroom. This will be our first proper parents evening in high school due to covid so didn't know things could be different in high school. school haven't said anything about the children attending.

@bigyellowTpot

Just that really, Do you take your kids to parents evening? I never have but now my year 9 dd is adamant she wants to come to parents evening next week as she wants to know what her teachers are going to say about her. I have said no as teachers may not feel comfortable talking openly about her while she is present. she is now not happy as all her friends are going with their parents apparently. I don't care and she's still not going but do other MNetters take their dc along??

I think it’s nice that she wants to be involved- as it is about her progress. Could you call school and ask them what they would recommend? It’s very unusual to see a parent attend without their child just because they don’t think they should be there.

I am a teacher and sometimes it can be really helpful for the child to be there. If I need to speak to the parent alone I just the pupil pop outside and wait. It's always fine!

It’s expected at our school that pupils attend with their parents.

I'd find it very odd to be honest if a teacher actively said they didn't want a child involved in parents evening.

My ds age 12 in year 7 had to attend his annual review - he has a physical disability and this meeting decides on support needed and funding allocation for the year ahead. I had to brace him to the fact that it may feel negative. Poor sod even had to create a PowerPoint with various questions he was posed. Parents evening compared to that sounds like a doodle. Plus they are growing up - why shouldn’t they start having independence? Why shouldn’t they ask questions? so what if it’s awkward for the teacher? They should conviction in what they say.

My DD is in Y10. Recent PE was online. I was talking to the teachers and some wanted DD to be there, but she was doing her homework. I think teachers prefer it if the child is present.

In secondary school it is expected for the child to be there

Absolutely from Year 7 and up. Primary generally say no to them attending because they're not old enough to make sense of the adult conversation and can be a distraction. But at secondary they need to engage with and start to gradually take ownership of their own learning. All the secondary teachers I know expect to see the kids there.

Child expected to be present at parents evening here - yr 9

Thank you everyone for all your comments maybe I will let her come along after all. I will phone school to ask what they'd prefer. I honestly thought schools preferred the pupils not to be there. thanks all.

Year 9 should be there as well. It is all about them and their GCSE options after all.

MrsPear - you are right parents evening is nothing compared to some of the meetings young people attend. I work in children's social care and young people are always encouraged to attend meetings once they get to around high school age. They need to feel included and validated.

Always have, it has been expected that they attend at secondary and from year 5 at his primary and I couldn't leave him home alone until almost then anyway. When he was little he was sometimes asked to play in the classroom or wait outside while I spoke to the teacher but then they'd call him in and speak to him too.

Our secondary school insists kids go with you, even now they're being held online they're still expected to be sat next to you.

Y9, absolutely should be there.

We used to take both kids to primary, because both of us wanted to see the teacher, so we needed them with us or had to pay for babysitting for 15 mins - basically meaning 1 hrs min. They were never invited in tho.