If you were a high achiever in school, what's your life like now?

[Marsmon]

Just curiosity. A lot of the students who won all the prizes at school and were champions in this or that have fairly mundane lives now. Me included.

Whereas I look at those from school who've gone on to do some fantastic things, like run large companies or have a series of books published, or work at the forefront of Covid epidemiology and lots of them never achieved much while in school.

What about you? Does your achievement level in school match how successful you feel your life has been as an adult?

I got As and prizes at school and went on to do Dentistry. I am a dentist so I guess it panned out the way I planned. I’m just a general dentist though, not a consultant or anything major, although that would have been open to me if I had chosen it.

Went on to do a MSc and PhD, and now an academic at a v prestigious university.

I was a high flier at school. Never had to put in an ounce of effort to get straight A*s at GCSE. Then I got to Alevel and the level of work increased and I didn't know how. I didn't know how to revise, what to do if I didn't know what to do or any of those type of skills. I got Bs and Cs at A level. I only really managed to get back on track in my final year of uni.

I've done well in my career path, but it's not a money driven career so I'm never going to be rich. Even the top bosses are only on £70k ish.

It's about so much more than 'high-achieving' at school though. Most of all, it's about self-esteem and self-confidence. Some of those high achievers at school will have been going home to abusive parents. Some of them will have had higher education denied to them because their parents refused to fill out any of the forms required etc etc. I think it's all to easy to see the girl who got all A's working a menial office job and to scoff, but really, you don't know what challenges she's really overcome to even get there.

Work part time in a local job I like. Still in my profession but by no means a high flier.
I opted to give priority to my family when the children were young so had nearly 10 years away from it. Sometimes I regret not starting my own business as I’ve come to realise that most managers/ business owners are finding their way/winging it every day and I probably could have made a good go of it. I’m too old now and counting down the years to retiring.
I don’t think brains are an indication of success- it’s drive and self motivation.

I got a great degree, did my Masters and currently CEO a national charity. DP went to Cambridge, did a PhD and now does something very complicated in the City (and earns twice as much as I do). We’re in our mid thirties.

We both come from pretty overachieving families, though. You picked your thing and then you were the best at it. Not succeeding wasn’t ever really presented as an option, if that makes any sense.

@Allsorts1

Studies show that high achievers at high school often do worse at uni than the middling ones at high-school. This is because the top performers at high school haven’t had to work for their success, you can coast through on natural abilities. Once you get to uni, you really do need to work to be successful, no matter how clever you are. The students who weren’t top in high school aren’t held back by the shock of suddenly needing to work to do well, it doesn’t impact on their identity in the same way that things are suddenly a struggle - because they always have been - so all their work skills start to beat the lazy natural talent!

This is interesting, because I found uni MUCH easier than school in terms of workload and having to apply myself. And I found my Masters much easier than my degree.

I think it ends there, though. I haven’t done a PhD, but from what I’ve seen, the workload is soul destroying.

Don't think there is a correlation between school success and later life success. Goes all ways I would say.

I run a careers consultancy. I’ve found it fascinating to discover all the different ways that each of us define success. It’s easy to assume lots of status and money is how we all measure it, but it really isn’t that way at all for most people.

I was a prize winner, spotty type - I loved school as it was a real sanctuary from my home life which was pretty chaotic. Went a bit into freedall in my twenties and tried various jobs that I didn’t stick to. I now run a small company of my own, work on my own terms, three days a week and love the work I do and the team and the results we get. I think my teen self would have been pretty happy. My next frontier is to write children’s books- I think that would have been her ideal job ( if I’m not getting a talk show or being a female hip hop star)

@Sswhinesthebest

I sailed through school and got a good degree whilst partying hard. I gave up my career when my first child was born and had 13 years at home. Now work in a flexible part time job that I enjoy, but certainly doesn’t match my original “potential”.

I’ve loved my life and I’ve been lucky to have choices.

I’ve had a similar trajectory to this. I was moderately successful in a career I didn’t particularly enjoy before children. Took a long time off (mostly - did a few freelance work from home things over the years). Now I’m in a part time job I absolutely love. I wouldn’t want to work full time in a job I cared about as much because I’m not great at setting work/life boundaries. Very lucky to have the choice.

Low achieving at school. Probably one of a handful that wasn't made a prefect. School reports used to say 'I worry about....'

Now I'm an associate professor in a Russel group university. It turns out wanting to prove others wrong is a great motivator!

The people who've done best financially from my school werent the handful of very very conscientious teacher pleasing diligent hard workers. Lots of them ended up as teachers, doctors, civil servants but oddly enough not progressed to the upper ranks. The people who ended up well off were the bright coasters who never quite pulled their finger out enough to be top in school - they mostly ended up london.

I was one of them. I earn over 100k in a finance role. The very hardworking girl who always beat me in maths & science became a teacher. Another boy who was extremely hard working cracked a bit at uni and ended up working in the charity sector.

@StillMedusa

I was a high achiever, went on to get a good degree... Now work as a TA in a special school ... so I don't think anyone would describe me as 'successful' if we are talking in career and monetary terms However... I have a 30 years + marriage, four happy (and for what it's worth MUCH more successful) children, including one who was never expected to be able to have a job (autistic, special schooled) and does.

I am able to work part time, which enables me to look after my baby grandson, take long walks with my dog and I have a home which suits my needs and budget.

So in money terms no, in life terms.. I've been very lucky!

Lovely

I was a high achiever at school, went to grammar school then on to a good University and got a First. I now work part time in HR so a decent job but not high flying! However, I'm happily married, have great friends and family and two wonderful daughters who are bright and funny and make me proud. So in terms of financial achievement, not amazing but I feel so content with where my life is at the moment. I always assumed when I was at Uni I'd go on to do a PhD and into academia but I think if I could have seen how life has turned out now I'd be pretty pleased.

Studies show that high achievers at high school often do worse at uni than the middling ones at high-school. This is because the top performers at high school haven’t had to work for their success, you can coast through on natural abilities. Once you get to uni, you really do need to work to be successful, no matter how clever you are. The students who weren’t top in high school aren’t held back by the shock of suddenly needing to work to do well, it doesn’t impact on their identity in the same way that things are suddenly a struggle - because they always have been - so all their work skills start to beat the lazy natural talent!

I think it's the opposite.school often rewards a certain kind of diligence rather than real brilliance - kids who revise their arses off the for the exam and basically do exactly as the teachers instruct them to do well. At uni you need to have got through school and have a bit extra in the tank. I think it's where the lazy coasting natural talent types are driven to do better because theres more freedom.

I was a high achiever at school - prizes etc. I did ok at uni. Found my 1st career v stressful and switched to junior role in new career. Not hugely successful, but doing fine, happy. I’ve found that my academic skills are helpful when helping my kids with work.

I was the in the handful of top students at my fairly rubbish secondary school, I left for a-levels at college.
I'm an architect with my own practice and I've generally done well with my career despite falling ill in my first year at uni and being diagnosed with a lifelong disabling condition which made actually qualifying a whole lot harder.
I've won a few awards as an architect, I'm fairly driven, sat on a few boards for things and was a director at my old firm before starting my own for a better life / work balance. I always wanted to be a superstar architect as a kid but actually value different things now so I'm happy with how things turned out.

My friend who is still boasting to all and sundry that she was a straight A student in school has a little Etsi business that she takes extremely seriously but doesn't turn over any money with. I was very middle of the road at school with not so great grades and now earn a very good salary. I am quite shy and lack social confidence whereas my friend is super confident, PTA lead, very vocal and opinionated, want t organise everyone. I have no idea why I am more successful professionally and think it pisses her off .

Did well at school and university in humanities subjects but haven't been able to translate it into career success (yet) . Have a vocational career with good work balance which links in with a passion of mine so at least there's that and have achieved dream of living abroad.
I really admire people who are hugfelt successful in their work or professions but it does seem like they have had different priorities to me.

I was a gifted top of my year group child at primary/KS3, still did very well in GCSEs and A levels but not as well as I could have as I had mental health issues. I then had a complete breakdown at uni but did eventually get a degree after a lot of time off and struggles. I have since got a lot better in my MH and am now a teacher. I do sometimes indulge in what ifs (I do wish I’d stuck with Maths for a start) but actually I’m a lot happier without the pressure of being “gifted” and am personally much better suited to being ordinary.

I was academically a high achiever but decided to be a musician, despite not actually showing much promise at the time 😅 Luckily for me it’s sort of worked out, but I guess I probably could have followed a higher earning path if I’d wanted to. I thought being a musician would be more fulfilling/enjoyable, but tbh covid threw a huge spanner in the works so I’m now considering retraining.

I’m sure there are loads of people from my year group who wouldn’t have been considered high achievers but are probably now doing very well.

I was a high achiever at school, met DH at Oxbridge. What our combined high-achieving has bought us is flexibility.

I did a lot of messing around and travelling in my 20s - I think I lacked confidence and direction. Stayed at home when kids were small and am now self employed. I enjoy what I do and manage to fit it in entirely around family life.

DH is senior public sector. He has always been able to negotiate a condensed working week because he is very able to do his job. He manages to combine a senior role with, for example, hardly ever missing a parents' evening or sports match.

It might not be conventional success, but it works for us.

I was always in the top 5% academically at school but was more likely to win prizes for sport or music.

I’ve got a middle management job, working 0.8 FTE for double the median wage, happily married with a healthy & happy son, a big house and enough savings invested to be mortgage free if needed.

Definitely compared to my peers at school, I am doing well/better than others. Part of it was moving out of our deprived town and not marrying someone from there. The average wage is about 23k there so moving away was the absolute best thing for my career.

I was academic at school. Context being that I was in a non academic school in a rough area. I tended to be in the top 2 or 3 in my year for exams.
I'm successful now on my own terms. I have a teaching position in one of the top five universities globally, which is interesting and fun although not well paid and I'm pretty low in the hierarchy. I'm happily married and have two nice kids. Own my own home.
I'm not driven by status, and am not good at politics but I do still enjoy academics.

High achiever at school and went to Cambridge.

After university, it's been endless struggle. Got diagnosed with autism aged 40, which explains a lot of the struggle but I do feel that I never lived up to my potential which is sad.

Materially, I'm comfortably off but not sure all the stress of trying to stay in well paid jobs was worth that.