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Original poster

Have or do your parents help you financially?

117 replies

Jazzcafecoffee · 05/03/2022 10:12

Most of my friends have had financial help from their parents or in-laws, some have had substantial help like deposits for a house and others are given cash gifts every now and

OP posts:

Waxonwaxoff0 · 05/03/2022 10:21

No. My mum's monthly income is lower than mine. She is still paying her mortgage.

Summerunlover · 05/03/2022 10:22

Ha ha nothing!

JamMakingWannaBe · 05/03/2022 10:24

Nope. It was made clear that once I left Uni I was on my own.

hobstey · 05/03/2022 10:25

I live in a now very middle class area & Im the outlier because our parents can't help. 3 flats on my road have been bought by parents for their 20 something dc (we are talking 750k plus). Lots of my friends have big help to move up the ladder & get school fees/holidays paid for.

marieantoinehairnet · 05/03/2022 10:25

No, I'm An adult and responsible for my own life choices

WouldIwasShookspeared · 05/03/2022 10:25

No. It's been the other way round. Over the years they had many many thousands out of me. Their money management was always awful and their priorities fucked up.

TeapotCollection · 05/03/2022 10:26

Not had a penny off them since the day I left school. Wouldn’t expect it any other way

hobstey · 05/03/2022 10:27

One of my older colleagues literally goes without treats to give as much as possible to her 30 something dc, she's already bought them homes mortgage free & then will inherit loads.

Meandmini3 · 05/03/2022 10:28

SaggyTights · 05/03/2022 10:29

My mum has helped me a huge amount. Deposit for my first flat, paid for my driving lessons (as an adult), has paid for some holidays for us, still treats my kids a lot.

She was a single mum and we grew up poor in a council flat, but she built up her career over the years and was able to save and have a good pension. She bought a flat that appreciated in value which she then sold/downsized, and she is in a comfortable position in old age.

She is also incredibly generous and totally devoted to her children and grandchildren. I know we are extremely fortunate.

She has given me the same values. Me & DH plan to downsize when our DC leave home and give them both deposits for flats. Everything i work for will be for them.

Hugasauras · 05/03/2022 10:31

Yes, my mum has been giving me some inheritance early so we've had a large house deposit, extension. Very grateful for it as it has made our lives much easier and more flexible. Hoping we can do the same for DDs when it's our turn.

YerAWizardHarry · 05/03/2022 10:33

We got £10,000 from in laws to use as we see fit. DP’s brother got his towards his wedding 10 years ago. We haven’t spent it yet as it came just as we were finalising our mortgage and had already paid the deposit etc

Daisydaisydaisydaisydaisy · 05/03/2022 10:34

Yes, lots.

My mum died when I was still at school and I was entitled to some money from her pension. My dad paid my rent while I was at university and then I had the pension money as my monthly allowance.

I had £50,000 deposit for my first house and inherited £150000 when my dad died. I am fortunate to have had financial help as I started adult life and plan to do the same for own children.

refraction · 05/03/2022 10:36

Yes deposit for house. Wedding paid for.
Help in other ways too. Childcare and house renovations.
I appreciate them so much.

CharSiu · 05/03/2022 10:39

No never and then when my Mother and DH Father died in the same year which is coming up to 4 years ago they left all their worldly possessions to their favourite children. Not us obviously. DH and his sisters relationship had no change but between the six siblings of mine a complete breakdown and none of us speak to the favoured child.

GreyCarpet · 05/03/2022 10:41

No. Was on my own the day I left school to go to university at 18.

I found out after that my dad had continued to pay maintenance for me whilst at university which explained my mum's new car, holidays etc for 3 years... that was in the days of full student grants and I got nothing from her at all and it never changed.

Paid for own driving lessons and wedding etc.

Oh and just for good measure, she's written my brother and me put of her Will so we'll inherit nothing either.

Dontfuckingsaycheese · 05/03/2022 10:42

Mum and dad have savings and a paid off house having worked hard all their working lives - dad had to stop when he had a stroke. My sister had well paying jobs, a wife and no children and a mortgage. I had crap paying jobs, ridiculously high private rental and years out of work as a single parent and carer for my son. A couple of years mum and dad gave me enough to buy the min % of a shared ownership new build ( They paid for 80% and me 20%. My rent has gone from £500 pcm to £200 pcm in a home for life for me and my son (now 19) if he wishes to live here. Dad died last year. Almost every day I tell mum how much I love our house and how grateful I am. I now have options that I wouldn’t have had. This year teacher training after 2 years as an LSA. Even doing that full-time wouldn’t have paid enough to keep me in old house. Next year teaching 🙂🙂 I have a place already. They gave the same amount to my sister. I know how lucky I am. And I am so grateful. And I think my mum is happy I am now secure.

MunchyMonsters · 05/03/2022 10:42

I had a child very young and they would help occasionally with food. In later years I got a large inheritance early.

GeneLovesJezebel · 05/03/2022 10:42

I had no help from my parents, they paid a little towards my wedding, that’s it. Very occasionally baby sitting.
However I’ve had to support my DD at Uni (yes, she has a job) and I’ll do the same for my DS if he wants to go.

GeneGenie123 · 05/03/2022 10:45

My parents are very well off and have been extremely generous and ‘gifted’ my siblings and I big amounts of money to help with house purchases. On the flip side they also supported my father’s mother for most of her later years. My bil also supports his elderly mother.

Fizbosshoes · 05/03/2022 10:45

My parents paid for my first car and driving lessons. After that they didn't really get involved financially until the last few years of my dads life when he started giving me and my siblings gifts of money (£500-1000) to try to lessen the chance of us paying inheritance tax, and he said he had more money than he could spend. (His pension was similar or more than any of our low-average salaries)
I used the money to pay for a short break (uk) or repairs for my car etc - things I would otherwise have used my credit card for.

Dontfuckingsaycheese · 05/03/2022 10:45

I will do anything to feed that forward to my son. However, my money ethic is the same as parents- don’t spend a penny if you don’t need it. Even treats if they are needed are ok. But they’re seen as treats and thoroughly appreciated. Whereas my son… every penny burns a whole - even the pennies he does not have… but I am working on him.

gamerchick · 05/03/2022 10:46

God no, wouldn't want it either. Pretty sure I'm not in any will neither

Dontfuckingsaycheese · 05/03/2022 10:47

hole! Grr!

Yellowleadbetter · 05/03/2022 10:47

No.
And I am out and proud to be jealous of those who do have financial help from family.
Lucky buggers.

That said, my own kids can piss off if they have even a teeny tiny idea that I will be helping them.
Hell no.
They are ungrateful as it is. Having spent their first 5 years eating their left overs (you don’t waste good fucking chocolate) I’m furious enough to be that petty.

The driving lessons and car we recently paid for ds doesn’t count….
DAMN IT!!!

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