Talk to me about real life outside London

[Herewegoagain84]

We’re considering the big move out. I’ve been a Londoner all my life and always considered I would stay, but I’ve got a third child cooking and I think it’s time. I know it sounds mad but I’d love to hear what your life outside London is like - especially with children at the weekend. We have everything so accessible to us here and always plenty to do. Can you talk me through how we might be spending our time and what activities you do / how weekends are spent? If you lived in London previously was it a good decision to move? Thanks!

But can't you see how tiresome it is to see the constant 'only London will do and eveything else is shit' based on complete ignorance is?

I don't think it's that, it's a fear of change/uncertainty.

In the same way people post if they should be worried about a London day trip due to terrorism etc.

I've lived in both with children, and life is quite similar in both. The biggest difference is the amount of time you spend in a car out of London compared to (in my case) none, in London.

Otherwise it's about the differences and there are pluses and minuses:

Size of house and garden for the price
proximity to countryside/beach/forest
air quality
crime/drugs etc (although I suspect teens everywhere are pretty much the same)
quality of schools (in my case though schools were better in London than where I went to)
Diversity of people who live there
Political leanings of people who live there
distance from work - I commuted back to London and that didn't work for me
Facilities in the place you pick
Culture in the place you pick - my friend moved somewhere and it took her ages to get used to the limited choice of theatres/galleries etc compared to London. She loves it there now though and wouldn't come back (because of the proximity to the beach...)

I don't find my children have any less freedom in London than they did outside of London, nor do I find they are subject to more crime/gangs/drugs. But we lived in another city, so who knows what a more rural life is like.

I grew up and lived in sw and w Herts for the first 39 years of my life. Moved to East Yorkshire 19 years ago. There is plenty to do, but you do have to travel to things a bit more.
All the cities in Yorkshire have good facilities and there’s the Moors, Dales, Wolds and Coast to boot.
I’d say travel is the only downside, but you get used to it! I don’t feel my three kids missed out growing up!

You cannot for one minute claim that everywhere outside of London is as well placed with facilities / activities as London is… it’s an impossibility. Yeah you’ve got 2 nice art galleries… they’ve got 20 (or 50 who knows) world class galleries. You’ve got a bus an hour or day and they’ve got them every 10 minutes. I’m from a town in the Midlands and going for coffee means the choice of 2 places and one of those is a Costa. I’ve just been to Norfolk which was lovely but places closed at 3 and everywhere was a drive. Great if you want a windy walk on the beach not so great if you want a tea and scone at 4pm. So it kind of depends on what you value and what you like doing. If you’re home bodies and you like rural walks and growing your own veg and maybe quiz night at a nice pub then there will be a myriad of places for you. If you want other cultural things and great transport links then the list of suitable places gets smaller.

Hare coursing, badger baiting, cock fighting, cow tipping, chicken rustling, getting pregnant by one of the Walzer men at the Easter travelling fair, church jumble sales, vegetable growing competitions , meat raffles down the pub, rolling big wheels of cheese down hills , setting fire to hay stacks, bog diving , gurning competitions ,

It's also different depending upon circumstances. Someone who was raised in X & moved to London in their 20s for a few years then moved back to X is going to have a different viewpoint to someone like me who was born & raised in London & is a 2nd gen immigrant with no ties to anyone else outside London.

@Thirkettle where do you live roughly, don't give too much away i am just intrigued by your relatives response? I am thankful I don't have people like this to annoy me, it must be tiresome.

I can’t believe this attitude!!!
Please expand your horizons.
Try not to be so small minded, patronising and superior if you do move.
The primary thing about moving about, is having a supportive social network.

I know where you are coming from! I moved out a few years ago and what I find different is:
the driving - we do cycle and there is a train for getting to London, but to get to most other places we drive - which has good and bad points - it means that if half the family is going somewhere the other half can't go anywhere else (as we only have one car)
The planning - to 'go somewhere' normally means a 30-40 min drive, and this tends to mean it takes up more of the day than it used to in London, where we used to be able to 'do something' in half a day.
The feeling of having done something worth doing - somehow walking along the South Bank, even if you do it often, seems less 'samey' than walking along a country footpath
The variety, especially of free activities, is greatly reduced.
Teenagers still need driving to places rather than being able to get the tube.

The positives:
We moved to be nearer family
We see much more 'nature' - variety of birds, wildlife etc
The children get to have a bedroom each and we have a large garden

Proximity to countryside is only a benefit to people who like the countryside - not at all universal.

Never lived in in London
But want to have an awesome place to live 20 mins from London
ST ALBANS

I’m from Birmingham and moved there in my 20s and if I could go back and own there I would. IT IS THE BEST especially for families

In the town centre there is history (it’s a Roman town) the cathedral is beautiful we lived right by it and miss the Bells (sounds crazy right) at Christmas the choir singers are amazing
There is so much green for walks
Lots of activities for children

It is, however the most expensive place outside of London. But cheaper but a stones throw

If you have the money and want to stay near I’d really really recommend St Albans

Sorry if this is irrelevant

@statetrooperstacey

Hare coursing, badger baiting, cock fighting, cow tipping, chicken rustling, getting pregnant by one of the Walzer men at the Easter travelling fair, church jumble sales, vegetable growing competitions , meat raffles down the pub, rolling big wheels of cheese down hills , setting fire to hay stacks, bog diving , gurning competitions ,

What? No shin kicking....?

Public transport outside of London ranges from poor to non existent.
I would love to know what hobbies can only be followed in London.
Other than that, depends where you want move to, a mining town in Derbyshire, somewhere in Somerset, the outer Hebrides or inner city Birmingham?

My DC were born in Essex which they keep trying to tel me is now classed as "East London" .
So as my DC are now Larndarners ...

My DS tells me he was thrown into the wilds like a young child in Sparta where he had to fight other boy toddlers for survival , then dragged himself home by his teeth,

I would leave but my white stilettoes get caught in those bastard cobbles !

i think this is blindingly patronising questioning comment op - I think you'd best stay where you are!

@Pluvia

I live in a tourist town in the SW which half of bloody London have flocked to over the last few years.

Appledore?

I suspect you are right. Most of Appledore's second homes are shut up in the winter and owners are from London. And it's getting worse according to my friend. Prices are now eye watering and locals can't afford to live anywhere near.

now to Northamptonshire and are now moving over to Warwickshire for better schooling.

is it really that different?

Im Warks

@statetrooperstacey to be fair, I do love a church jumble sale! For the baking and jam, if nothing else. The best board game ever was 50p from the Scout jumble sale at Meopham Scout Hut. Although that Scout jumble sale had nothing on the Scout jumble sale where we live now, the Scout jumble sale at our current location has never turned up such a great find as Rumble in the Jungle. Although it will NOT go back in the box.

Pretty standard pub quiz question is "how many cities in the UK have an underground rail system". Clue it is greater than 1.
The ex-Londoners that moved to our Yorkshire village still parked like they were squeezing into tiny London street spots. Or maybe they were all arseholes for other reasons.

We spend lots of time staring at fields which can be boring. However at least our children have the chance of getting to adulthood and not get stabbed like every teenager in London

I live in a shed in a field. We have no access to anything near us. Stay in London.

@Pluvia, I don't know about Appledore, but I'd say it was true of other tourist attraction towns and villages.

Airb'n'b is killing villages and towns

We moved from London to a northern city in the early 70s (primarily for the house prices), when it was considered much more unusual to do so. We live in a suburb and have brought up 3 children managing quite well with only one car - the children were able to walk to primary and secondary schools, we chose after school activities within walking distance and there is good public transport until late into the city centre (I commuted by bus and my husband could do his longer commute by bus or train if I did need the car after school). None of our children learnt to drive until they went to university and needed very little driving around as teenagers.

I'm not saying this is the case everywhere outside London - just pointing out that there are options!

Cheese rolling.
Haggis Shoots.
Poke-the-peasant-with-a-pickle.
Stone Racing.
Competitive Earwax Modelling.

For special occasions we take it in turns to beat the dog.

So aside from shopping, catching up on homework, housework and eating, our weekends over the years have included:

parkrun
running races
running club
swimming
outdoor fitness classes
athletics events
football matches
football training
cub/scout camps
visits to grandparents
visits to National Trust properties
walks along the canal
gardening (not me, DH)

cinema/theatre is available in nearby towns

not beach people but other people in my town shoot off to West Wittering every time the sun comes out