Talk to me about real life outside London

[Herewegoagain84]

We’re considering the big move out. I’ve been a Londoner all my life and always considered I would stay, but I’ve got a third child cooking and I think it’s time. I know it sounds mad but I’d love to hear what your life outside London is like - especially with children at the weekend. We have everything so accessible to us here and always plenty to do. Can you talk me through how we might be spending our time and what activities you do / how weekends are spent? If you lived in London previously was it a good decision to move? Thanks!

Ignore nasty comments OP— I think they misunderstood what you were asking. I think start from the point do you drive and have a car? If so whilst in London it doesn’t make much difference as you can get pretty much anywhere , if you don’t and depending where you move to, that makes a big difference as some places far better than others if you haven’t got access to a car. Presuming you have then if you move to a large town or city suburbs I don’t think your life will change drastically (I’ve lived all over in southern uk - St Albans, Richmond, Oxford, Canterbury, Bristol, Bath, windsor —- same stuff , different city as others say above—- however if you decide to go more country then that’s a different thing unless you are happy to spend a lot of driving in order to create the same kind of activities you gave in London . Really depends what you all enjoy doing— if you like shopping, eating out, 1 o clock clubs in parks, sports and leisure , gigs - then I would stick to the city's and large towns with plenty going on and good connections — however i may be barking totally up the wrong tree and you are actually looking for suggestions of stuff to do that involve a more rural life?? If so, I’m not the right person- I like facilities and 10 minutes walk to ‘stuff’ but then I don’t drive.

@aloe987 where do you live? I live in a standard suburban town and it's diverse. I get that political views can be a bit of a struggle to get your head around as some places tend to hold onto to their blue status for generations. But, no one I have met every speaks politics except to talk about how shit Boris is lol.

@HibouMilou

I can’t believe this attitude!!! Please expand your horizons. Try not to be so small minded, patronising and superior if you do move. The primary thing about moving about, is having a supportive social network.

Ironically, it's narrow horizons that Londoners moving out have issues with.

[quote vivariumvivariumsvivaria]@Crepuscularshadows wins

Jocasta missed the singing lift in the South Bank centre but we made up for it by going into the high flats' lifts in easterhouse and singing the sash

Proper laughed.[/quote]

you'd get a good bit of exercise in running away afterwards, too.

What a strange and patronising thread! 🤣

@Herewegoagain84

We’re considering the big move out. I’ve been a Londoner all my life and always considered I would stay, but I’ve got a third child cooking and I think it’s time. I know it sounds mad but I’d love to hear what your life outside London is like - especially with children at the weekend. We have everything so accessible to us here and always plenty to do. Can you talk me through how we might be spending our time and what activities you do / how weekends are spent? If you lived in London previously was it a good decision to move? Thanks!

We soldier on - just

@cheddez

But can't you see how tiresome it is to see the constant 'only London will do and eveything else is shit' based on complete ignorance is?

I don't think it's that, it's a fear of change/uncertainty.

In the same way people post if they should be worried about a London day trip due to terrorism etc.

Sometimes this but tbh I can't help thinking some of these type of posts are somebody posing as a Londoner - with the intent of playing to anti Londoner sentiment (not accusing anybody on this particular thread).

As a born and bred Londoner with family the same, I find it mind boggling that someone would think life stops outside of London.

Aside from most (obviously not all) people generally having at least some day trips or holidays outside London, it's a very diverse city with people from all over the UK and beyond. Londoners meet, speak to, are friends and colleagues with people from so many different places. Most are well aware of the various opportunities that 'outside' has to offer.

There's also TV and the Internet showcasing life 'outside'.

Well my reply was purely tongue in cheek and it seems the op took it that way. You sound lovely btw, op!

@ivykaty44 we need more options for secondary and sadly Northamptonshire is quite poor quality-wise in that department. I have taught in this county at both secondary and primary around where I live and it's a shame.

My DH works in Rugby so that made the decision and I am from Staffs so am closer to friends and family too. I also can't find another area around the county I want to move to which we can afford. I would move to Olney in Bucks tomorrow if I could! But would of course want one of the houses on the main road leading in/out of it

Obviously I can only give my own personal anecdotes but the people I know with OP's concerns are all originally non Londoners. Some born and bred Londoners stay by choice but many are here despite rather than because it's London. They stay only because it's home - the place where family, community, and support network is. Invaluable but clearly not London specific.

@BarbaraofSeville
But can't you see how tiresome it is to see the constant 'only London will do and eveything else is shit' based on complete ignorance is?

Yes it's just the same as the view that everything in London is shit - dirty/expensive/pretentious also based on complete ignorance

I've lived in both and what we all do day to day is not that different. (although the public transport might be an exception)

The OPs ignorant but likely innocent post has just opened a whole new level of bitterness

I’m genuinely interested, particularly in how people’s lives changed after they moved out of a big city.

This is the exact point OP. I find it hilarious people are taking the piss out of you for asking the question. If it’s exactly the same why do people leave London in the first place? People don’t leave for exactly the same life .

I grew up in a village a 15 minute drive from a small town which had terrible public transport. Have lived in London since I graduated. One of the biggest things putting me off making a move like that is I don’t want to spend my weekends being an unpaid taxi driver to my kids until they’re old enough to drive themselves. I love that we can do lots of things within walking distance.

Although, tbh @ivykaty44 I would Home Ed if things were rubbish there too. Being in Education can make one very opinionated on these things lol. DH has loads of lovely work friends who are recommending schools left, right and centre. We did not research any of that when we left London cos we were so desperate to leave!! Idiots that we were

Mainly enjoy the lower levels of pollution and overpopulation and people who don't have much clue about 'life outside of London'

Are you the same poster who was terrified of the Welsh?

Seriously though, I can appreciate your apprehension at leaving city life, particularly as you are a Londoner born and bred. Lots of staycations over the next year or so, explore the UK thoroughly, find your happy place, then get on RightMove!

My sister moved from North London to South Manchester and has never been happier. I moved from South Manchester to North Wales - not because of Dsis but we were downsizing and we absolutely love the beach (seaviews from every window) and the mountains and the friendliness and the slower pace of life.

Yes it's just the same as the view that everything in London is shit - dirty/expensive/pretentious also based on complete ignorance

Yes, the number of people who think a clumsy post from a single person justifies them slagging off a whole city is surprising. There was someone up the thread laying into a London over the fact she’d turned up early for an appointment. Just madness.

I love London, and visit every two or three weeks. I lived there for ten years when younger and childless. I live in the West Country now. Sea views, beach five mins walk away and a train station 2 mins walk...which gets me to London in under 3 hours. My children have large bedrooms, large gardens and more pocket money than I could afford to give them in London. My eldest goes to private school that I could only afford in London by saying no to other stuff. Kids home is within easy reach of the nearest city by train or car or bus. We have dogs for walking, picnics for eating at the beach, country pubs for drinking, and meet lots of tourists from all different areas of the world who travel through. I love my weekends in London for grown-up time, but I wouldn't bring my family up there. Too expensive, too crowded etc. I love my seaviews, my fresh air and the open spaces of rural areas.

What kind of daft question is this?

I live in Yorkshire. We wander the moors up here in our spare time calling 'Heathcliffe, Heathcliffe'. Sometimes on a weekend to inject joy into our Northern soulless lives we go pigeon racing! 🤣

If you like city life, don't move rurally or to a small city.

I moved to a live on the edge of a smaller city and really miss the buzz of a big city, do not like the homogenous community I now live in (I'm talking about attitudes and lifestyle rather than ethnicity, though there's that too!) and miss the diversity of stuff and volumes of people of a city.

So its about knowing yourself and what you need for a good life.

I guess the thread also highlights peoples’ hostility towards Londoners too perhaps - it's not that people are hostile towards Londoners, (believe it or not you're the same species as those of us that live elsewhere!) it's that people get a tad pissed off with the Londoncentric attitude from those that live within the M25. Like the rest of our fabulous country doesn't exist, or count.

Even your op, asking what people do to fill their weekends. Don't you realise that that is going to vary hugely depending on where you live? Or that people might move from other large cities, Manchester, Birmingham, York and relocate to smaller towns or villages.

You need to give a bit more information. Where are you thinking of moving too. Commuter distance from London, or elsewhere? Rural, market town, small city or another large city? Coastal or inland?

@Tealightsandd I take your point but I didn't actually meet anyone (well enough to be friends) who wasn't a 2nd gen immigrant (I did go to a faith school & grew up in a very diverse Z2 area) until I went to uni. Every holiday was spent abroad as all family are still in those countries. Day trips were the odd day to Brighton or Chessington, it was only once I was older I explored more.
DH is also a born & raised Londoner & our closest friends from school are still here so we are in a bit of a bubble. Everyone I know who has left London; NCT, school mum, neighbourhood friends didn't move to London until they were adults & have just returned to "home".

I guess the thread also highlights peoples’ hostility towards Londoners too perhaps - it's not that people are hostile towards Londoners, (believe it or not you're the same species as those of us that live elsewhere!) it's that people get a tad pissed off with the Londoncentric attitude from those that live within the M25. Like the rest of our fabulous country doesn't exist, or count.

But everyone who has lived in London gets tarred with this brush when actually it's not representative.

It's like the constant posts about Londoners who move & push up prices & push out locals. It's fine for this to happen to local Londoners though.

What a ridiculously odd question., If you wan't to move away from London, and live a more rural life, you will be less stressed, and not be worrying about what to do with children entertainment wise, The air will be fresher, and not full of noise and car fumes, and lots of people milling about. There are lots of documentaries on tv, all about countryside living, with lovely scenery, and a calmer way of life. There are lots of things to do and visit, without spending a fortune in some rural areas. No big shopping areas, and no Macdonalds and the like, on every road..

Depends what kind of person you are, if you wan't a change of lifestyle.

It’s the same as life in London! We have theatres, farms, parks, castles, dog walks, poncey overpriced cafés, swimming lessons, drama classes and museums just the same as everywhere else. What we don’t have is people who think London is the bloody centre of the universe and ask patronising questions 🙄