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Original poster

If you’ve finished having children, Do you wish you had had more ?

157 replies

LovelyYellowLabrador · 14/02/2022 16:01

I sort of do
I could have sotsrted a family mid 20’s as was with dh from early 20s
But we wouldn’t have been able to do things how we wanted to if we had starters earlier

OP posts:
Thewindwhispers · 14/02/2022 21:01

Yep. As do all the women I know. We were the generation that was lied to and told having children under thirty was bad.

NationMcKinley · 14/02/2022 21:02

We have 3. I knew I wanted another about 0.3 seconds after I’d had the second. Once I had the 3rd I knew I was finished. Until she was 2 that is. Then I really wanted another but super chilled out, child adoring DH was adamant 3 was enough and I kew he was right from a financial and practical point of view.

I don’t feel like anyone is “missing” the way I did after the second was born but I’d have still liked just 1 more……..That said, I could prob have 10 and still thing oh just 1 more Grin

CampervanQueen · 14/02/2022 21:08

Nope. I was always going to be a '1 and done'. DS is 6 and I have never wavered from that decision. DH wouldn't have minded 1 more but recognised the ultimate decision was mine. Thankfully he has never held that against me.

Quail15 · 14/02/2022 21:24

I have two and would love another but we couldn't afford to have another in childcare. I also have an awful time getting pregnant and keeping hold of pregnancies and couldn't put myself or dh through it all again.

I've had several miscarriages ( between my eldest and youngest ) including the loss of twin girls. When I was pregnant with them, DH and I were preparing our lives for having 3 kids. We got used to the idea, worked out what car we would need and how we would manage. I was devastated when I lost them.

I love my youngest to pieces and wouldn't change things for anything but I still feel that I'm missing one.

rhowton · 14/02/2022 21:26

We have two, DH had a vasectomy. We can't afford to have more than two, and that does bother me sometimes.

Evanna13 · 14/02/2022 21:50

I have two and happy with that.
Do not think I have the mental capacity or physical energy for more.
When my youngest was about 18 months we thought about a third but 5 years later I am so glad we didn't.

mistermagpie · 14/02/2022 21:53

I have three. I wavered about the third but she is the absolute light of our lives. It was the right decision but I am DONE and happy.

DH would have had one more...

saltedcaramelhotchocolate · 14/02/2022 21:53

I have 2 and in theory I wanted more because I loved being pregnant so much. DH and I discussed and agreed on 2. In reality I wouldn't cope with more, 2 is enough.

Figgygal · 14/02/2022 21:56

I have 2 boys with an almost 5 year age gap
Had them in my 30's i never envisaged having any more than that

pinkhousesarebest · 14/02/2022 21:59

Not at the time ( two), and now both are at Uni in another country, I am grateful every day for that decision.

Porcupineintherough · 14/02/2022 22:00

Yes and no. I've two and always wanted 3. I still kind of wish we'd had 3. But our finances would be so, so much worse if we'd had another, frighteningly so. Which is one of the reasons we didn't in the first place. So I still think we made the right decision but, but but...

peboh · 14/02/2022 22:06

I have one dd, and I'm done. DH is waiting for an appointment with his gp to discuss getting a vasectomy.
I feel complete with one, and have absolutely zero broody feelings or any kind of want for more.

PerditaPerdita · 14/02/2022 22:10

Yes 20 more

PerditaPerdita · 14/02/2022 22:10

21

Rubyupbeat · 14/02/2022 22:12

I have 2 (in their 30s) but wish I'd have had 4 plus.

thenightsky · 14/02/2022 22:14

@Rubyupbeat

I have 2 (in their 30s) but wish I'd have had 4 plus.
That's me. I would have loved a 3rd and even a 4th. Finances stopped it.
Hellhath · 14/02/2022 22:20

I've got 5. I had 3 with my first husband and the got sterilised (we had decided on 2, I fell pregnant with number 3 with an IUD in)
My second husband and I desperately wanted a baby together so I was lucky enough to have the sterilisation reversed, and it worked. I fell pregnant with our second one together when DD was 14 months old and we knew we would want a third so he had a vasectomy when I was 5 months pregnant ! I love pregnancy, birth and babies so much i would have had more if work and finances allowed. I had to be stopped somehow !

SirSamVimesCityWatch · 14/02/2022 22:21

A little bit regret not having a third. But we would have struggled financially and now that's we're coming out of the toddler stage with number two it is nice to be getting our lives back a bit. I think really I wanted another baby but not another child. I would still like another baby to cuddle to be honest!

PhileasPhilby · 14/02/2022 22:32

Hmm we have 2 and I’m happy with it for loads of reasons - it’s the right decision for us and our situation.

There’s still a tiny bit of me that would love to do the giving birth and having a tiny baby bit again though. But not enough to mess up literally everything else that is brilliant about our lives.

Fifipop185 · 14/02/2022 22:44

We have 2 DC, we would have both liked 3 but I couldn't medically carry any more and DH went on to have a vasectomy. There are no regrets, our house, car and pocket fits 2 DC and their age gap of 4 years has worked well.

changenametimeagain · 14/02/2022 22:47

I can't possibly imagine another child measuring up to our 3 year old Grin she's the light of my whole (extended) family's life and obviously the apple of my eye. She calls us the Three Musketeers.

ivfbabymomma1 · 14/02/2022 22:58

@whoruntheworldgirls it's a nightmare isn't it! Somedays it's all I think about out 😭

Goldendaffodils · 14/02/2022 23:03

One and done - she is my absolute world, and I will happily devote the rest of my life to worshipping her. Grin

Marzipanfruit · 14/02/2022 23:07

I have one (not going to use the 'only' word) and would have loved another one. My husband was not keen as I was so ill after no. 1. No way could I have changed his mind but always wonder what, or who, could have been. I know I am blessed but sometimes fantasise about children who could have been. Is that wrong ?

TrippinEdBalls · 14/02/2022 23:07

@changenametimeagain

I can't possibly imagine another child measuring up to our 3 year old Grin she's the light of my whole (extended) family's life and obviously the apple of my eye. She calls us the Three Musketeers.
I thought that - that we'd had the best baby in the world once (I mean, he didn't sleep and can throw a terrific wobbly, but he has a character and intelligence that, in my wholly unbiased opinion, far surpasses any of his peers Grin), how could it happen again? But would you believe it, we only went and got the only other baby in the world who's as good!

We really are very blessed because we also happen to have the best two cats in the world.