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Original poster

Paying to attend child's party?

550 replies

arachnidpearl · 01/02/2022 11:15

Would welcome views on this.

My DS has been invited to a child's party on Sunday. It's at an activity place with a climbing wall then food afterwards. Accepted invitation weeks ago, have bought card and gift etc.

We've been sent a message yesterday from birthday child's parent last night which says that all children under 8 must be supervised by an adult each, which is ok with me I don't mind staying (would rather not, but it's not the end of the world) but that in order to stay and supervise we have to buy a full price adults ticket, which costs £25!

Is this usual? It seems a bit of a cheek to me!

OP posts:

affairsofdragons · 02/02/2022 17:59

I imagine most venues that book children's parties make the terms and conditions pretty darn clear at the time of the booking.

AllThatFancyPaintsAsFair · 02/02/2022 18:01

@tiredofitall99

Ah, id say the parent didn't realise.. There would definitely be a fee to pay, and as you have to join in it will likely be a full price ticket. ive not booked certain great places for a party due to the parent rules. yes its a lot you weren't expecting, but I'd just see it as a day out with little one as I wouldn't want to tell him he cant go, and some other parents might not turn up either and I'd hate to do that to Birthday child

You are obviously finacially comfortable enough to pay £25 for a couple of hours of doing something you don't want to do and think of it as a day out

No way could I justify that and it sounds like the party parents are the same

Stickystick · 02/02/2022 18:02

I feel mega sorry for the birthday child and also for his mum. I don’t think she twigged about the £25 until it was too late. Now her poor son has nobody coming to his party AND she is out of pocket.

I think in the mum’s shoes I would:

ask the venue if they can cancel the party as nobody can come, and roll over the deposit or whatever she’s paid them to credit for climbing sessions.
if they refuse to do that, tell the local paper and shame the venue.

It’s the venue’s fault really, it’s totally unreasonable to charge for a kids party AND charge for parents to stand there and supervise.

TheFinalStraw85 · 02/02/2022 18:06

I booked a party at our local softplay. I paid for all the children and a party lunch. All adults who attended were free!

Even when i take my daughter to places where it’s very clear the activity is for the children only but the parent has to stay or sometimes even join in (because the activity or childs age requires it) it’s normally only a couple of pound for the adult.

I’d be so embarrassed to ask parents to pay so they could bring their child to my childs party. Personally I wouldn’t go but that’s just me. If your child really wants to go and you think they’ll miss out of they don’t, the suck up the costs xx

rosesandbees · 02/02/2022 18:10

Taking my 5 year old to a climbing party at the weekend. 4 parents have been asked to help but we don’t have to pay. I think if you are hosting a party you have to bite the bullet and pay for the extra adults. I absolutely wouldn’t be paying £25 to supervise, you have made the right decision.

Mandyjack · 02/02/2022 18:24

Should've been advised about this when the invites went out. Ring the venue and check, surely if numbers are low the birthday child's parents could supervise the kids? If you were a family with 4 kids you wouldn't have 1 adult per child so why do you need 1 for a party?

wellstopdoingitthen · 02/02/2022 18:25

@Mandyjack

That's a very good point.

Yehbut · 02/02/2022 18:29

I’d definitely check with the venue explain you would just be there to supervise and not climbing! See what they say.

MeridianB · 02/02/2022 18:31

Wow. It seems she has handled this really poorly. Your response is perfect. The last minute rules about supervision and costs were crazy!

Grrrpredictivetex · 02/02/2022 18:32

@Yehbut

I’d definitely check with the venue explain you would just be there to supervise and not climbing! See what they say.

If you read the thread you'd see OP has already checked with venue!

FairyLightQueen · 02/02/2022 18:32

My partner is a climber and I've never ever seen entry for £25 for one session - something is amiss here.

RG2468 · 02/02/2022 18:50

It’s a shame for the little boy - not thought through by the parents at all !

Oreo78 · 02/02/2022 18:55

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Tigger1895 · 02/02/2022 19:04

Supervision is usually free in most places, the 25 would apply only if using the facility

Poppitt58 · 02/02/2022 19:09

£25 is unlikely to be the price for a climbing session at a northern climbing wall. £12.50 is the most I’ve seen to actually climb. That doesn’t include induction for a non-climber though.

Inductions used to be about a tenner, but a quick google suggests £25 could be the price of an induction+a climb for a new adult climber.

Climbing parties are usually over 8s only - it’s due to insurance, so to take under 8s all parents would need to be signed off to climb at the wall - you’d need to prove you were an experienced climber or pay for an induction.

In short, they’ve chosen a daft party for an under 8 with friends from non-climber families.

dizzydizzydizzy · 02/02/2022 19:10

@3scape

*also. What does the venue do about twins? This reminds me of the ridiculous rule my local pool had, preventing me as a single parent from using the pool with two children.

That'd not a ridiculous rule. All leisure centres in the UK have this rule - it is to prevent drowning.

PeekabooAtTheZoo · 02/02/2022 19:14

I don't think the mum is a CF or a bitch or the other things she's been called by some on this thread. She probably thought the venue had reasonable, sensible terms and is now lashing out at the wrong people because her poor kid's birthday is ruined. I'd be heartbroken if I'd tried to organise a party for my little ones and it had gone so wrong that confirmed attendees now cancelled.

Mirimu · 02/02/2022 19:17

Maybe price is only if you also want to climb but it is free just to supervise?

PlntLady · 02/02/2022 19:23

£25??? I'm assuming if it's a climbing place this would be the standard fee for an adult climber. I'm a climber and have climbed in soooo many indoor places. Never have I ever paid as much as £25. Not even on occasions of a last minute climb and hiring gear! Also I have tought many children to climb (family and friends kids, etc), and I'd say 90% of the time they let you in for free if your supervising or belaying (essentially holding the rope and lowering them down).
Maybe your friend has her wires crossed and the cost if for for adult entry with hire. I'd call the venue, explain the situation and ask them to confirm the price.

Anabella23 · 02/02/2022 19:23

There are plenty of places that dont charge or charge a small amount - climbing centres in cheshire - for instance usually says under 8s have to be supervised but not each child, one adult in party usually enough sounds like they have either got it wrong, or the place is a rip off

Mylittlespuds · 02/02/2022 19:30

I’ve taken our son to a climbing place once only, I had to pay for supervision but they don’t really want you on the frames with them they just want you around if something goes wrong. He broke his arm mainly because he’s a bit clumsy and wasn’t watching what he was doing but also low staff levels on site to help first timers on new equipment too. He was age 10. Do yourself a favour sack it off and go to lunchtime Pizza Hut and catch a film or bowling instead with the your child. As for the gift give it the child for their birthday and offer him around for tea instead with some nice dessert so there is no hard feelings. Personally, the trampoline places are great but the climbing ones need more staff to help children or let parents be more hands on and less stand about and supervise. Without knowing the full content of the dialogue between the parents who organised it and the company it would be presumptuous to put blame anywhere it could have just been a miscommunication. Not ideal to ask parents to pay to supervise but I’m sure an honest quiet conversation about the expectation to you both financially and with your pregnancy will suffice. The important thing is to show your child there are solutions to things and that plans don’t always work out but sometimes better things can happen instead, ie tea at your home instead. As long as you have done your best to encourage a friendship between your child and the other child then that’s all the matters. Poor child who’s birthday it is...😕

Happycat74 · 02/02/2022 19:46

Sounds like the parents are trying to get you guys to cover the cost of the party! Check with the venue, there's no way it would cost that much to supervise your own child!

GreenerWithTheScenery · 02/02/2022 19:49

OP, have you considered calling the venue?

EmbarrassingHadrosaurus · 02/02/2022 19:56

others have already dropped out (shock!) and her son is upset.

Like PPs, I feel for the boy at the heart of this as it must be so hard for him to accept that it's not personal.

However, it seems as if you're not the only one making a sensible decision, OP

NewPapaGuinea · 02/02/2022 19:57

What a ridiculous policy. I’ve taken DS to a climbing wall and only had to pay for him as he was the only one climbing.

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