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Original poster

Paying to attend child's party?

550 replies

arachnidpearl · 01/02/2022 11:15

Would welcome views on this.

My DS has been invited to a child's party on Sunday. It's at an activity place with a climbing wall then food afterwards. Accepted invitation weeks ago, have bought card and gift etc.

We've been sent a message yesterday from birthday child's parent last night which says that all children under 8 must be supervised by an adult each, which is ok with me I don't mind staying (would rather not, but it's not the end of the world) but that in order to stay and supervise we have to buy a full price adults ticket, which costs £25!

Is this usual? It seems a bit of a cheek to me!

OP posts:
littlefireseverywhere · 02/02/2022 11:47

Perhaps not the best venue for an 8 year olds birthday, might be better for a 9 year old, then they can just stay and play. Odd though!

JuergenSchwarzwald · 02/02/2022 11:47

@DartmoorChef

I'm not sure what a parents role in supervision would be either. If its a climbing wall, and the child freezes and gets scared at the top, then it's the job of the trained Instructor to talk them down or climb up and rescue them, they don't expect the untrained parent to do this.
Well exactly. Having looked into this a little more I can't see how having a parent there would be remotely helpful.

Venue should simply say no kids under 8.

Aroundtheworldin80moves · 02/02/2022 11:50

Poor kid. Hope the parents can salvage some sort of party for them, but its really not the guests faults.

As an aside... is £25 normal for entry to a climbing place? While I don't expect it to be cheap, that does seem a lot. Last year went somewhere where the whole day of activities was £15 per person, including climbing, watersports, target sports, obstacle courses..

GruffaloSolja · 02/02/2022 11:51

£25 seems such as disproportionate amount to essential stand there and do nothing. It makes me wonder if the activity is actually based inside much larger amusement attraction? Where the owners quite obviously wouldn't want people staying the whole day without paying. £25 for a day at somewhere like Diggerworld, Legoland or Alton towers would be understandable as there are lots of other things to do there.

user33323 · 02/02/2022 11:57

It isn't a suitable party venue for a year 4 child when half the class will still be 8. If they really wanted to go ahead the added cost should always be on the hosts, they are cheeky fuckers. I'd perhaps send another message to ask if they can get their money back and meet at Bowling/soft play/cinema/pizza hut instead? Just for the sake of the poor kid who can't help his parents poor planning. Party venues are hard to come by at the moment, but there are always other options.

KarenTheGammonRemoaner · 02/02/2022 12:01

lol what a thing to spring on someone at short notice.
I would assess it like this:

Is it important my child attends this party? (good friend etc. etc. )

Yes?

Can I afford it?

No?

Can I afford it?

Yes?

Go.

No?

Don't go.

Staffy1 · 02/02/2022 12:05

What a ridiculous rule by the venue. That means parents of three children under 8 can’t take them unless they find a spare adult, and for those prices for adult they must be losing a lot of customers.

RedskyThisNight · 02/02/2022 12:05

Maybe the birthday boy's parents can salvage the party by inviting (and paying for) 4 children and 4 adults?

I agree with others; it sounds like the venue puts in a ridiculous charge to dissuade children under 8 parties.

jytdtysrht · 02/02/2022 12:31

The venue sounds greedy, the mum was probably ambushed by this requirement which was no doubt not explicitly made clear to her. But she was then very silly and cheeky to assume that she could just pass the costs off to everyone else. Poor kid though.

Parker231 · 02/02/2022 12:37

The mother was a fault for not being upfront. The charges would have been clear when she booked.
The venue can make their own rules and charges.

GertrudePerkinsPaperyThing · 02/02/2022 12:40

They expect you to pay £25 for this? No way!

Obviously, I mean obviously, if something like this is involved then the host factors that cost in and pays for the parents. You don’t demand other people pay for your child’s party - and at the last minute too

switswooo · 02/02/2022 12:41

others have already dropped out (shock!) and her son is upset.

He is upset due to her actions, not yours.

GertrudePerkinsPaperyThing · 02/02/2022 12:42

Just because her child is now 8, the fact they are half way through the class ages (born in Feb) should give her a clue that not all others will be 8!

If she had an August born I could understand her thinking that but honestly 🤦🏻‍♀️

TeenPlusCat · 02/02/2022 12:47

The parents just need to do a second round of invitations to the autumn borns in the class. ~5/12ths of the class should be old enough (unless the school has 2 classes and has split by age I suppose).

Cissyandflora · 02/02/2022 12:50

@WeeFae lols

CookTheRice · 02/02/2022 12:57

@Aroundtheworldin80moves No, definitely not! Our local wall is £10 for 2 hours. Free to spectate. Out of interest I just checked the wall in London I used to climb at, which being in London and one of the biggest climbing centres in the UK one might expect to be a bit more expensive. It's £13.

I don't know how £25 could possibly be justified, even for a climbing adult.

Needdoughnuts · 02/02/2022 13:18

It doesn't make sense. So visiting as a family with three children we'd have to find another adult to take and pay £75 extra just to watch our children for a couple of hours. If they really don't want under 8s just say so!

EezyOozy · 02/02/2022 13:26

No chance would I pay £25 to attend a kids bday party. I would say I can't afford it and not go!

LouLou198 · 02/02/2022 13:27

£25 is ridiculous!! Glad you have managed to get out of it, enjoy your day!

BlackAmericanoNoSugar · 02/02/2022 13:30

I did a birthday party at a climbing wall place for DS, bouldering rather than tall wall so no harnesses or hooking on. They did ask for at least three adults (for 16 children), I think so that if one adult had to accompany an injured child there would still be two adults left. But they provided an instructor so we didn't have to actively supervise at all (except to take the challenging ones for a little time out to calm down), and we certainly didn't have to pay.

They didn't accept children under 8 at all though. I think it might have been DS's 10th birthday when we went there so that was fine.

Berthatydfil · 02/02/2022 13:56

It’s not even half way through the school year so by a rough average less than half the boys in the class will have turned 8.
I doubt she’s a CF I think it’s more like she either didn’t think or the venue didn’t ask the ages of the invited children or tell her this rule at the outset.

I sympathise as there are going to be a number of disappointed children here including the birthday boy and mum will also have paid for the invitees. However it’s a big ask to expect the parents of younger children to attend - work commitments may just not allow that, and to have to pay £25 to attend is just unreasonable.
What a shame for all concerned.

whynotwhatknot · 02/02/2022 14:02

thats ridiculous but sounds like she knew already when she booked it so its on the mum i think

Memyselfandfood · 02/02/2022 14:16

I would cancel even if not pregnant, its ridiculous
.

FelicisNox · 02/02/2022 14:18

I have 6 children (all 16 +) and never in the history of ever have I sold tickets or asked for adults to subsidise my children's birthday parties?

How utterly greedy and innapropiate.

If you can't afford a lavish party, don't do it, just do a tea party with a few close buddies with parcel the parcel.

Quite often it's the parents who want to show off with these ridiculous parties... the kids only want what we show them so be humble is my recommendation because you'll only have to perpetuate or worse, escalate the cycle.

ArnoldBee · 02/02/2022 14:24

The birthday mum had an opportunity here to say its ok I'll supervise your 7 year old as my 8 year doesn't need supervision.

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