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Original poster

Paying to attend child's party?

550 replies

arachnidpearl · 01/02/2022 11:15

Would welcome views on this.

My DS has been invited to a child's party on Sunday. It's at an activity place with a climbing wall then food afterwards. Accepted invitation weeks ago, have bought card and gift etc.

We've been sent a message yesterday from birthday child's parent last night which says that all children under 8 must be supervised by an adult each, which is ok with me I don't mind staying (would rather not, but it's not the end of the world) but that in order to stay and supervise we have to buy a full price adults ticket, which costs £25!

Is this usual? It seems a bit of a cheek to me!

OP posts:
Abcdefgottago · 01/02/2022 19:51

I thought the whole beauty of parties at this age was that you got to drop or leave or that you stayed but drank coffee & browsed Mumsnet for 2 hours 🤣 no way on gods earth I would be paying £25 to supervise my own child at a party not of their choice! Batshit.

Frannibananni · 01/02/2022 19:53

Well here’s a business that deserves to go bankrupt. What stupid rules.

duvetdayforeveryone · 01/02/2022 19:57

@Frannibananni

Well here’s a business that deserves to go bankrupt. What stupid rules.
Not bankrupt @Frannibananni as I wouldn't want staff to lose their jobs :(

However, if this thread could be picked up by DM and the company is named and shamed that would be great Grin Even better if the company also apologised for such stupid rules.

Redwinestillfine · 01/02/2022 20:00

Thats awful. Most places requiring supervision charge a nominal £1 viewing fee

alittleje · 01/02/2022 20:00

We had a super cheeky invite late last year to a trampoline park asking for £8 for the child’s ticket! Needless to say dc didn’t go

8 quid wouldn't bother me, unless you had 10 kids going it's hardly going to break the bank but having said that I agree it's absurd and cringy people would ask for money for this. I think some people just have very bizarre attitudes and ideas towards saving money or money in general that they would feel no shame in it.

Like if you can't afford it have a party at home and get a cheap Iceland spread in for the food-nothing expensive.Kids really don't mind provided there is food and other kids to play with.

Rainartist · 01/02/2022 20:07

[quote 2022HereWeCome]@Rainartist I disagree.

The venue should make it abundantly clear of that children younger than 8 cannot be supervised by the staff and not accept booking for an eighth birthday party. Frankly it's a stupid rule, either they can offer climbing safely or not.[/quote]
They probably do, the fault lies with the parents not telling guests...

Rainartist · 01/02/2022 20:10

@ElftonWednesday

They're entitled to have whatever conditions they want

No they aren't HTH.

It doesn't help no...

Why? Is there a reason? If the parties are advertised for over 8s and they told the organiser that and that other children should be supervised then again the fault lies with the parents of the birthday child who obviously couldn't be arsed to pay the extra.

Kite22 · 01/02/2022 20:13

None of us know if the venue didn't make it clear to the parents, when they made their enquiry, or if they did and the parents are being completely unreasonable in accepting it and then dropping it onto guests parents now. Either way, I agree that the venue shouldn't be taking party booking for dc they can't supervise. I am surprised that any climbing venue would even allow parents with no qualifications to be in charge of small dc whilst they are climbing - or an over 8, for that matter. Confused

I wouldn't be going, even though I do feel very sorry for the child.

HaveringWavering · 01/02/2022 20:20

What exactly does supervising involve? Why is it not possible to do this when seven months pregnant? Are you allowed to do it when 2 or 3 months pregnant? We have a climbing wall near us where kids can only go with an adult who has done basic belay training, but that’s not going to apply to parents who just go there for the party. So if the parents are not actually climbing, how do the venue justify the charge? If supervising the kids the parents are not taking up space on the climbing wall that can’t be sold to other punters. This seems deeply deeply odd. Not saying you have got it wrong OP, I mean that the whole setup is so odd it sounds like this venue have not actually hosted a kids’ party before.

Riverlee · 01/02/2022 20:24

£25! I’d rather use the money to go to the zoo, or other family attraction. Not supervise my child at another child’s birthday party for an hour or so.

Rainartist · 01/02/2022 20:26

@Lurking9Till5

Don't name and shame the venue!

They're entitled to have whatever conditions they want.

Then they should be ok with their terms and conditions being made clear to potential customers

We don't know that they haven't done that to the people who purchased the party package. They could have explained about younger children to the parent organisers and they didn't really take it onboard. They could have offered a significant discount to other parents attending as part of the package. It could be the receptionist speaking to the op today got information wrong. I don't think they should be named and shamed on here without a chance to defend their position.

I think it sounds like the supervising parent is being charged as a customer of the facility or a climber themself. I think it's extortionate, I wouldn't pay it and if true the business won't last long as people will vote with their feet I'm sure.

In the op's situation I would be deining the invite. However, I still think the fault lies with the party child's parents over the venue, for not establishing these facts from the business, not absorbing the costs of their potential mistake and the pure cheeky fuckerness of asking the I voted children's parents to pay any additional cost for their/their child's benefit.

BendingSpoons · 01/02/2022 20:28

I'm taking my 5yo to a climbing party at the weekend. Just checked the T&Cs. It says first 10 adults free and each adult after that £2.50. I'm assuming they are paying, but I won't mind if I have to pay £2.50. It's crazy not to offer a spectator ticket where you are going.

Howshouldibehave · 01/02/2022 20:32

£25?!

I’d rather put the money towards a takeaway that the whole family can enjoy!

Original poster
arachnidpearl · 01/02/2022 20:42

DS is not going. We'll do something fun ourselves instead and he will give his friend his card and gift at school on Friday.

I've messaged party mum, explained that I contacted the venue and said that as I'm not allowed to supervise due to being pregnant then he can't attend.

She replied and said that was a shame, as she's already paid for his place, and can't his Dad bring him as others have already dropped out (shock!) and her son is upset.

I confirmed no, Dad is working (which is true), and said if we'd have been made aware of the requirement for parental supervision and tickets on the invitation then we'd perhaps have been able to make alternate arrangements but as it is it's too late notice. She hasn't replied.

So it's done.

OP posts:
Howshouldibehave · 01/02/2022 20:44

@arachnidpearl

DS is not going. We'll do something fun ourselves instead and he will give his friend his card and gift at school on Friday.

I've messaged party mum, explained that I contacted the venue and said that as I'm not allowed to supervise due to being pregnant then he can't attend.

She replied and said that was a shame, as she's already paid for his place, and can't his Dad bring him as others have already dropped out (shock!) and her son is upset.

I confirmed no, Dad is working (which is true), and said if we'd have been made aware of the requirement for parental supervision and tickets on the invitation then we'd perhaps have been able to make alternate arrangements but as it is it's too late notice. She hasn't replied.

So it's done.

Well done. What a bloody stupid way to organise a kids party-they are real CF!
Momijin · 01/02/2022 20:46

@arachnidpearl

DS is not going. We'll do something fun ourselves instead and he will give his friend his card and gift at school on Friday.

I've messaged party mum, explained that I contacted the venue and said that as I'm not allowed to supervise due to being pregnant then he can't attend.

She replied and said that was a shame, as she's already paid for his place, and can't his Dad bring him as others have already dropped out (shock!) and her son is upset.

I confirmed no, Dad is working (which is true), and said if we'd have been made aware of the requirement for parental supervision and tickets on the invitation then we'd perhaps have been able to make alternate arrangements but as it is it's too late notice. She hasn't replied.

So it's done.

Well done op. The mum sounds a bit of a dick
duvetdayforeveryone · 01/02/2022 20:48

@arachnidpearl Very well dealt well. What you wrote to the mum was perfect.

InvalidCrumb · 01/02/2022 20:50

Really feel for the kid Sad

OnlyFoolsnMothers · 01/02/2022 20:53

Gutting for the kid- parents need to look at costs better and ask themselves what they would have thought with that invite

whiteworldgettingwhiter · 01/02/2022 20:54

@Mamamia7962

Have never heard of this, where is the party? Is it at a theme park?
Ffs, it's literally in the OP!
Gilmorehill · 01/02/2022 20:54

The mum is very rude to try to make you feel bad but I would believe anything with parents these days, especially when it comes to birthday parties.

TequilaStories · 01/02/2022 20:58

Pretty terrible business model for a venue running kids parties as well. Have had my fair share of kids parties at climbing walls, pools, arcades etc and anywhere offering kids parties always included supervision as part of the package otherwise no one would book them.

Notjustabrunette · 01/02/2022 20:58

The mum should have looked into the total cost at the time of booking. I looked at a similar party once and you had to pay for the adults which made it really rather expensive. So I arranged something else. She might be pissed off, but I think deep down she knows she’s messed up here.

WheresYourSnickers · 01/02/2022 21:00

[quote duvetdayforeveryone]@arachnidpearl Very well dealt well. What you wrote to the mum was perfect.[/quote]
Agree! Very well handled OP. Min drama and fuss. Poor birthday boy, but it really was a silly way to go about it. If mum had been upfront then people could have made a decision when invited, and she wouldn't have paid for unnecessary places.

RampantIvy · 01/02/2022 21:01

@InvalidCrumb

Really feel for the kid Sad
So do I. He isn't going to have a party is he.