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Original poster

Paying to attend child's party?

550 replies

arachnidpearl · 01/02/2022 11:15

Would welcome views on this.

My DS has been invited to a child's party on Sunday. It's at an activity place with a climbing wall then food afterwards. Accepted invitation weeks ago, have bought card and gift etc.

We've been sent a message yesterday from birthday child's parent last night which says that all children under 8 must be supervised by an adult each, which is ok with me I don't mind staying (would rather not, but it's not the end of the world) but that in order to stay and supervise we have to buy a full price adults ticket, which costs £25!

Is this usual? It seems a bit of a cheek to me!

OP posts:
whenthedoveslie · 01/02/2022 17:37

Being able to pay is completely irrelevant.

I have never heard of such a thing. Parents having to pay to watch their own child at a party they were invited to is an extraordinary ask and an outrageous one.

The party child's parents must have known. I have hosted more kids parties than I care to remember (almost always at venues) and I always knew what I was organising and that ALL costs fell to me.

It wouldn't bother me too much if I were presented with an invitation that required external costs to contribute to theme of party, but a sly last minute add on of 25 pounds is crass.

I would send our best wishes and decline.

IncompleteSenten · 01/02/2022 17:41

@nitsandwormsdodger

It was a typo wasn’t it op ? and you feel a bit daft starting a tread over nothing .... at least come back and tell us Grin
Bet you feel a bit daft not reading the OPs posts properly...

😁😁

HotWaterAndLemon · 01/02/2022 17:45

Well done for checking, could you imagine if you turned up with your child to attend a party and was told that you couldn’t supervise him because you’re pregnant? And then your child couldn’t attend the party?!

Every climbing party I’ve been to before I ‘supervised’ from the cafe with a coffee. Not a chance I’d pay £25 to do it.

SparkleSpangle · 01/02/2022 17:50

What is the name of the venue?

Hawkins001 · 01/02/2022 17:50

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

ADisgruntledPelican · 01/02/2022 17:54

If the birthday child is 9, it's possible the parents didn't realise the rules were different for the guests who were 8.
I guess it must be related to liability and the venue's insurance policy for DCs.
Luckily being pregnant is the perfect excuse not to attend.

SpeedRunParent · 01/02/2022 18:06

@Pbbananabagel

Everyone saying this is outrageous of the venue - hold on. OP said this is a local family run business, they probably haven’t got the qualifications or insurance for supervising children under the age of 8 at a party and probably told the parents a certain number of parent supervisors would be required for an 8 year olds birthday party with the idea that other children would be over 8 years. Its not the venue’s fault that the other children are under 8 years old. They have a cap on the number of people they can have in there so if the birthday child’s parents haven’t paid for exclusive use they need every adult in there to be paying. The fault here is 100% on the birthday child’s parents for not checking all the rules prior to booking and inviting the kids.
Well they shouldn't offer parties for under 8's then.
NoJaffaCakesAreKeptInThisVan · 01/02/2022 18:06

This is ridiculous. There is absolutely no need to charge accompanying parents £25 to supervise their child.

Sheer utter greed.

climbingplant · 01/02/2022 18:12

Don’t they have instructors with them in the climbing area? My 6yo has been to a centre with climbing walls and a couple of instructors are there so they can change walls and make sure the children are all ok. Parents are outside of the climbing area, though we can still see the children and are close by if something happened and they needed to go to hospital or something. Isn’t a load of parents in the climbing area a safety issue too?

It makes no sense charging parents who aren’t going to be climbing £25. I feel for the parents and birthday child if people pull out because of this. The centre must be making a fortune from this.

RampantIvy · 01/02/2022 18:15

@Sweetpeasaremadeforbees

I would text the mum saying something like ‘sorry I didn’t realise DD would need my supervision, I was planning to stay and watch but with being 7 months pregnant I can’t be actively involved so unfortunately X will be unable to attend’

This. I'm not sure I'd want to ask my family members to take on the responsibility either.

This is a good response. I don't see why the children should suffer from the parents' and the venue's incompetence, so I would then invite the birthday child round for tea another time and give them their present then.
Lunificent · 01/02/2022 18:17

What have you decided to do?

Verillion · 01/02/2022 18:34

I’d be telling the parents I wasn’t allowed to supervise - if they weren’t willing to do it I would tell my child that they couldn’t go.

RubyKitty · 01/02/2022 18:36

Just tell birthday boys mum that you aren’t allowed to go so could her husband/sister/brother/friend be your sons adult. That way your child gets to go but you don’t have to pay!

AngelinaFibres · 01/02/2022 18:39

When my children were small enough to go to parties where adult supervision was required I could not possibly have afforded to pay to attend. That's bonkers. I would decline the invitation

cherish123 · 01/02/2022 18:51

They are being cheeky. They should really be paying. I'd check with the venue. Just give card and packet of sweets as a present.

Prinnny · 01/02/2022 18:53

Let us know what you decide to say to the party mum OP, far too invested in this thread Grin

Pbbananabagel · 01/02/2022 18:58

@SpeedRunParent

SpeedRunParent

They aren’t offering parties for under 8 years old though. The party is for an 8 year old - again, this is the parents fault not the venue.

Pbbananabagel · 01/02/2022 18:59

The birthday child’s parents probably went “yes our child will be 8 years old, we’d like to book this party please” and when told the rules/terms and conditions sounds like they went ‘yes yes ok’ then when the venue confirmed numbers with them they reminded them of the details and then the parents panicked.

Rewritethestars1 · 01/02/2022 18:59

The venue is possibly making an extra £150 on top of the cost of the party/food which will be at least £100 probably much more. If they require supervision by adults this should be included in the party cost not additional. Absolutely nothing but greed on the part of the venue. They don't sound competent either to be honest. I don't climb but im sure you need some experience or insurance to supervise children, unless its one of the easy clip places but then the prices suggest its not.
If I was the host parents I'd have sucked up the extra cost and put it down to bad planning on my part, I'd no way ask parents to pay.

SpeedRunParent · 01/02/2022 19:07

@Pbbananabagel
You'd have to be pretty dense not to figure out that an 8th birthday party is going to have 7 year olds involved.
The costs for supervisory places is absurd, we live in the south east and none of our local climbing / go karting / trampolining places charge anything like that - family business or not.

Darbs76 · 01/02/2022 19:13

I have a vague memory of something like this for parties my kids went to so I dropped off. It’s a bit of a cheek but I expect the mum didn’t know. I guess it puts her in a difficult position as her paying for 8 parents would double the cost of the party. If it was me I’d pay for the minimum number of parents needed to supervise, I wouldn’t ask parents to pay this, no way

skeemee · 01/02/2022 19:30

@2022HereWeCome

I think the venue is taking the piss to be honest. No way would i be paying for a party and then for every adult to have to fork out £25 just to be on call. As a comparison DS went to a go ape 8th birthday party, some children were 7 - the party package included instruction/ supervision for the children. Supervising adults had to be at the site. I think it was one adult per 4-5 children but there was no charge for watching!

Can you name and shame this venue OP - they are fleecing parents?

Couldn’t agree more. The venue are being ridiculous. The parents of birthday child are likely already paying £20pp for the kids. To charge spectators £25 on top is just crazy. That’s almost £400 for a kids party of 8. As a parent, I wouldn’t have been able to afford this, either as the organiser or guest.

I feel bad for birthday parents. These charges are totally OTT.

Cuck00soup · 01/02/2022 19:31

We're in the south east and I paid £15 per head for DDs year 4 party which included 2 instructors.

I would say the parents are either trying to cover the cost of the party or they have booked a party for 8 year olds and need additional supervision.

Hathertonhariden · 01/02/2022 19:42

At least the hosts won't get parents dumping random siblings and doing a runner.

They are CFs for not covering the cost though.

duvetdayforeveryone · 01/02/2022 19:43

That is crazy!!!

My DS went to a climbing party at Rock up and my DH was allowed to stay with our son for free.

And why the flying fuck can't a parent be a supervising adult?!?

I definitely would not be attending this insane birthday party!