Trapped toddler parents: support through winter and beyond

[squishymamma]

Following on from the previous thread:

www.mumsnet.com/Talk/_chat/4292353-Trapped-toddler-parents-Inspiration-and-support-needed-through-the-summer-hols

Not the most inventive name but apt I think...

Good morning everyone, I can't believe we are in May now.

Yes DH has just taken them out so I've got my laptop out and a coffee and stuck my eyelids open with sellotape to get on with something! Ha, that's what I feel like doing as dS2 keeps waking me up in the night and we were again up at 5=50. Yawn.

Well done Motherofmonsters, it's hard getting them both out. I honestly can't take mine to a park by myself because I know they will run off on different directions. dS2 is fast at the moment and ran off on me in the supermarket car park yesterday. I'm thinking I'll have to put his reins back on which he will gate but safety comes first. He's starting to bolt which DS1 also did but now he can pretty much behave and not run off in random directions.

Hope you have a nice quiet day Squishy.

Hope you're all ok.

Had lovely weather yesterday so went for a walk in the woods, threw things in streams, climbed, played with twigs and pebbles etc and saw the bluebells. All pretty good and not too much in the way of frustration from any of us.

Today DH was supposed to take them both out and give me some time to catch up on work, but it's miserable weather here so that's happening tomorrow instead. So far had Encanto on and have promised gingerbread making while DH plays with DD.

@squishymamma oh yeah, when it has to be you its so annoying, especially when I'm trying to get something done and DH is just there. We've tried to encourage DS to notice what we're doing and think about who to ask (with limited success).

Today has been Sunday whingeday. Absolutely nothing has been right. dS2 refused to get his costume on in the changing room and was screaming so had to go home and abandon the swimming... honestly it sounded like I was forcing him to go in the pool! Will wait a few months and try him again.

Hope everyone has had a better day. Any nice plans for the bank holiday tomorrow?

Evening all.

Hope you managed to get a bit of work done at least @Chocolatetrifle. Sorry to hear about the swimming drama!

We've spent the evening tag teaming sitting in DS1's room trying to make him sleep, he's still wide awake. Only slept for about 20 minutes today so I think he's overtired. He's in a happy jolly mood though but I'm dreading the tired cranky child I will have tomorrow...

We had a nice time at the barbecue though so can't complain much about that. Can't believe it's Monday again tomorrow, where does the time go? No bank holiday here so the usual nursery for DS1 and milling around for me and DS2.

Sleep well!

Evening!

Not a very exciting day here, didn't actually get moving until midday. We needed milk so took them to the shop while DH is working on the office conversion and then picked up McDonalds for lunch.
DH had the idea to get the kids to help paint the walls in the office, it did not go well. DD screamed as she got covered in paint, we told DS to paint the walls and the first thing he did was cover a plug socket. DH shouted so DS ran into the house sobbing with shoes covered in paint...

Sorry swimming didn't go to plan @chocolatetrifle.

How did the gingerbread making go @prettygirlincrimsonred?

Nothing exciting tomorrow planned, DH is hopefully finishing the office. I'm probably going to decend on PIL in the afternoon.

Morning!

The kids are currently painting boxes, absolute chaos for 8.30 in the morning.

It's a wet day here so not sure what we will get up to yet.

Hope everyone is having a good morning

Gingerbread went well, mainly because DD was in another room! Haven't decorated them yet but that might be a plan for later. Trying to gently encourage DH and DCs out the door as per his plan so I can get on with things. Although it has been a pretty good morning (bit of reading, drawing, building), so not actually desperate to see the back of them! Currently trying to push a 'everyone gets dressed before going downstairs' thing so it doesn't become a battle with DS later in the day (yesterday he got dressed at 2ish having got flour all over his pyjamas), and it does feel like it helps me feel a bit better as well.

@Motherofmonsters wish I was better at getting DCs involved in things, I've discovered a bit of a control freak tendency with kids and letting them try painting sounds good (though hope cleaning up wasn't too stressful).

@Chocolatetrifle sorry swimming didn't go well.

@squishymamma hope DS1 wasn't too grumpy this morning. Is it generally ok getting him to nursery?

Happy bank holiday,. I'm hormonal today and getting up at 5.50 again did not help. I've been very short tempered with my boys today and DH has been in a massive grump since yesterday so having to deal with three whingers has driven me to the chocolate caramel nibbles.

Boys wanted to go outside for water pistol fights at 7.50am and wondered why I don't want to?!!! Bit fed up of cleaning the house only for it to be a mess again. Sleep, thats all I want, some sleep!!!

Right sorry for morning, I'm going to pull myself together, make a cup of tea, do a bit of tidying and prep tea for MIL coming later.

Hope you are all having a more serene day than me. Tonight I might light a candle and sit in the bath with the lights off and just chill......

Hello all

Just got back from the supermarket where I forgot to register my car for the free parking on the way in and got fined 😑that's how my day is going so far! I've challenged it though because it was just before I came out so I've made out like it was just as I was going in...we'll see if it works!

DS1 was again ridiculously clingy today, he slept badly last night because his nose was blocked and literally clung to me like a limpet when I was trying to get him into nursery. None of this happens with DH obviously! Can't wait for this favouritism to be over.

@Chocolatetrifle ah sorry to hear you're having a rough day, a quiet bath tonight sounds lovely. I often feel like I have 3 kids too! Hope you have a nice tea.

Hope you got your alone time too @prettygirlincrimsonrose!

@squishymamma , that's really annoying. Do you think they have CCTV? Would they bother checking it if you contest?

Sorry for my rant earlier. Tomorrow I'm going to be a calmer more serene version of myself.thank you for listening though.

Sleep well everyone and remember you are all doing a great job managing everything, it's definitely not easy some days

Evening,

I've been a big grump today as well. DD has kindly given me a cold and I just can't be bothered to be a parent if I'm honest! I did go to PIL this afternoon for an hour but other than that nothing exciting.

DH has finished the office today so we've just been out there building furniture and setting it up. It's going to make a massive difference to the business and the stress levels in our house. DH now has a place to concentrate without the chaos of the kids.

Hope everyone has a good night sleep and a good day tomorrow

So DS got up for the day at 3.30 and got in a proper fight at school over a ball. His teacher did say he was very mature about it when he was sent in to think about his actions (he took the ball off the other person). Happy Tuesday 🤦🏻‍♀️

Hope everyone's having a good day

Motherofmonsters, oh no, I can't believe you were up at 3.30 this morning, how awful. I thought I had it bad when dS2 was up at 1.30 arguing with me about his pyjamas, which we had to change because he wanted different ones, at 1.30 in the morning!

It's all such a learning curve school isn't it? That's good your DS dealt with it maturely. There will always be incidents similar I'm sure which all of our kids will experience as they grow and change. Tomorrow is a new day and hope you sleep better tonight.

Sleep well everyone.

Hello

How is everyone this afternoon?

I've just fished a nappy out of the washing machine...

Other than that okay day here, DS went to school. I had loads of work to do this afternoon so my DM came and played tea parties with DD.

Evening all, hope you're well - and that you're feeling better @Motherofmonsters.

DS1 has had a cold and gave it to all of us so we're all sniffling away. Nursery has said the past few days that DS1 has been throwing more tantrums than usual and requires more cuddles, they think its because he's not well. I agree for the first 2 days of the week but yesterday and today he's been his usual self here so I'm wondering if he's just gotten into a particularly tantrummy phase and they haven't really seen that before! He does have a very short fuse like his mother

Otherwise not much to report, both DC have been really fighting bedtime so DH and I don't reconvene at the couch until after 9pm despite beginning bedtime at 7.30pm. Missing the lack of adult time, we haven't really watched TV or anything, just collapsed into bed!

Hope everyone has a good night (and the DC don't drive you mad for 2 hours at bedtime!)

Evening,

Hope you got your work done Motherofmonsters?

Oh no Squishy, sorry you've all got colds. It's hard to find any evening time I find too, mainly because mine tend to settle between 8.15 and 8.30 and then I just seem to want to go to bed myself! I'm trying to get back into reading and read a bit before bed. We had a decent afternoon at a museum, was a nice change. We then had a power cut for two hours straight after we had eaten tea luckily, we eat early here at 5, so the boys played jumping on the couch for a bit.

Sleep well hopefully.

Evening,

How has everyone's day been.

We've had a good day here (other than an embarrassing school run as DS went feral, not sure what's going on with him at the moment) took DD to ballet where she had a good time then went to Lidl for nappies and picked up some goodies at the bakery bit.

Got the urgent bits done yesterday of my work but we're getting a bit lost with it all. The business is getting away from us and not really sure what the solution is. DH is out doing the work and I'm dipping in and out of it with the kids but I can't be fully sorting it out. But then we're not sure if there's enough work to take someone on. Kids and working is definitely a struggle.

Friday tomorrow! Hope everyone gets some sleep

Good morning all, I am awake early as dS2 has been awake a few times tonight. Another day!

It's hard Motherofmonsters, if it's straight forward administration you need help with perhaps you could take on a student on a temporary basis to help with the more basic tasks. I did something similar for work experience during uni summer holidays. Harder though if it's just your time that's needed when you've got the kids and DH needs to be out doing his bit or it's too complex for a temp. I guess it depends what kind of help you need.

Think it's going to be a wet day today. Might go to the library later on or do some baking with ds2.

I ordered some bits of school uniform for dS1 yesterday! Felt a bit emotional doing so!

Have a good day.

Hi everyone

Today was day off with DCs. Went on the bus to museum for a play/toddle and lunch in the cafe, and then home via some nice gardens. Meant to go to the park but was overly optimistic about the weather and didn't have coats, so popped home and then ended up watching coco instead and playing/sorting food.

Last night DS reminded me not to get cross (always horrible to hear that 😥) and managed not to snap at all, but also didn't really do much. DS wants to do something with me (e.g build lego), DD tries to get involved so I have to distract her and then DS gets bored/annoyed. But also hard to actually do any focused things with DD because DS demands my attention.

@Chocolatetrifle Weathers so mixed at the moment! Did you get to library or do any baking? We're also getting ready for school in September and feeling pretty emotional (and like I should stay away from threads about school playground cliques!)

@prettygirlincrimsonrose we made rocky road biscuits but we didn't make it to the library! We ended up.going to Clarks to get shoes and pumps. I can't be doing with playground cliques either! I'll be staying away from all that!

Please can you give me any tips to deal with hormonal stomach bloating. I seriously look 6 months pregnant. My two c sections are not helping I don't think but it's like I'm just ballooning up at certain times. Any tips?

Hello hello! Sorry I've been a bit quiet, life got busy, but I've caught up now.

@prettygirlincrimsonrose I find it really hard to do fun stuff now I have 2, dividing attention is difficult. DS1 (2yo) demands me all the time so I feel I'm neglecting DS2 (4mo), but I can't come up with fun things to do with DS1 because I constantly have to feed/burp/change DS2...so exhausting. Hope you had a good day today.

@Chocolatetrifle have you checked if you have diastasis recti still? I've heard that strengthening those muscles can help "hold it in" if you know what I mean. Peppermint tea for some reason helps me with bloating but I'm pretty sure that's anecdotal 😅

DH and I went to an amazing 3* Michelin restaurant for his 30th yesterday, totally drained our bank accounts but was so, so worth it. An amazing experience and also wonderful to be totally child free for the first time in months! Poor DS2 still wouldn't take a bottle so was starving when we got home, but it was only a few hours so not the end of the world.

DS1 has been really tired all the time lately, but he gets a good 2 hour nap at nursery and maybe 10-11 hours at night. Anyone else experienced this? He doesn't seem sick and he has energy to play around, but he's a bit whiny and it takes less to set him off on a tantrum. Maybe he's still learning. He loves playing a game where we pretend to look for something all over the house (random i know, and I never know what we're looking for) and today he started saying "not there", which is what I usually say. Made me really emotional, it's his first 2 word sentence!

Hope everyone has a good night.

@squishymamma glad you had a good meal out fir your DH's birthday, I bet it was delicious! Great to have some time just for you both too.

I'm going to keep up with the peppermint tea yes and I've been reading up on the effect diet has upon the menstual cycle do I'm going to try to eat to help my hormones if you know what I mean, no sugar!

Your dS2 could just be having a growth spurt. I think his mind might be working overtime on his language development too at this stage, but I'm no expert, just a thought! Will he take a child vitamin also? I try to give my 2 year old liquid child vitamins as he has recently got so fussy with food saying he doesn't like anything.

Well today I'm aching all over because I was having a go on DS2's scooter in the garden, as you do, and went too fast and launched myself hands and face first on the floor, it was not a pretty sight!

Hope everyone is ok.

Hello, how is everyone doing today?

We've had an okay day, got the usual message of them thinking DS1 is under the weather when I picked him up from nursery but they've said that for over a week now and he's perfectly fine at home so I think he's just using up all his energy then crashing. The woman literally said "he's not quite himself" then followed it up with "we have been out since 2pm (it was 4.30pm) and he had 3 servings at lunch"...doesn't really sound like a sick child to me!

Anyway sorry for the rant, I guess I'm just tired because he's obviously in this whiny and clingy stage where he refuses his dad and will only let me do stuff. It's tiring even though I make sure I have downtime every day. Maybe I should try the multivitamins (I have adult ones for me already!)

How's your body @Chocolatetrifle? We've all done that 😅

Hope everyone has a good sleep.

Yesterday the garage door shut on my head so I have not had a good weekend body wise, basically I'm old and too fat! Seriously, I'm 42 soon and have an umbilical hernia which will need repairing once I need to stop lifting these boys up as much, and I need to lose some weight. Feeling a bit better today though thank you!

Squishymama, it's absolutely exhausting, it really is and you are not ranting and dont worry it's perfectly fine to rant here!
It's probably the two's with your oldest DS. It sounds like he was ok though if he ate lots of lunch and was outside a lot at nursery. My dS2 is a few months older than your DS1 and he's really starting to get going on the bossy being difficult stages.

We had a decent day today, toddler club for dS2 then playground this afternoon. dS2 has now figured out how to unbuckle his car seat belt which is another new line of terror.

Hope you get some sleep tonight.

Motherofmonsters how are you doing?

Prettygirlincrimsonrose? How was your day?

Evening! Currently sat listening to DS1 jumping around and chatting away to himself...he'll fall asleep eventually...

@Chocolatetrifle oh dear its just one thing after the other! Glad you're feeling a bit better. I'm dreading the day my DC figure out how to undo their belts, I have vivid memories of my sister doing it and then trying to open the door (fortunately my parents always had child lock on) - there was a lot of shouting that day...

We've had a good day, DS1 is still fairly whiny and very attached to me but he was a bit smilier today. He seems to be coming out with new words every day so I'm sure it's related to that, he also does have 2 languages to learn so probably very mentally exhausting!

Well now both DC are angry and whining so I'd best go see to them...hope everyone has a good night!