Trapped toddler parents: support through winter and beyond

[squishymamma]

Following on from the previous thread:

www.mumsnet.com/Talk/_chat/4292353-Trapped-toddler-parents-Inspiration-and-support-needed-through-the-summer-hols

Not the most inventive name but apt I think...

@pompomsgalore what a cake, looks fantastic!

@Chocolatetrifle I understand the nit terror so well as I have super thick hair so when I got them it was a military operation over several weeks to be quit them...

I'm just on my way to pick up DS1 from nursery after a lovely coffee and walk with a friend who had a baby a month before I did. DS2 has been so easy, one bonus of the early days where they sleep all the time.

We tried yet another strategy last night where we let DS1 decide when he was going to have a bath (which he knows is the first step in his bedtime routine, so essentially when he wanted to go to bed). We also kept in putting DS2 to bed. He only complained once or twice and then woke up this morning super happy, so fingers crossed this one works tonight too! Obviously if he never wants a bath we'll have to eventually force him to bed but last night he kept within our time frame so all was well!

What an amazing cake @pompomsgalore was it edible in the end?

@squishymamma one of the strategies will hit it right and stick hopefully, sounds like giving your ds1 a bit of control will help!

Hope the jabs don't bother baby too much @secondhandtable

We've had a lovely first day here, dh mum has cooked us some lovely food and we've done a bit of shopping! Ds seems to be out of whack as lunch was late so he's napping just now because dinner wont be ready til 8pm which is usually past his bedtime. Not sure whether to go with the flow and just get back into routine when we get home or make sure we stick to his normal routine!

@SecondhandTable how about a small intimate party for your/her actual friends only. Remember the party is for her benefit and no one else's. Get her to choose who she invites and sod everyone else. Or do two things. Small party as above and another park date for any randoms you feel you have to invite. Just say to those people we will be at this park on this day and time. Take a cake and some juice cartons and job done.

Cake update: looked great, barely edible but photos look good 😂

I agree with @pompomsgalore, your DD should be able to just invite those she actually spends time with (and recognises ) @SecondhandTable

Hope everyone is okay today. We've just dropped DS1 off at nursery and I'm going to make a list and go do the big shop...then relax for the rest of the day because I'm knackered MIL is coming later today so she'll pick DS1 up and spend some time with him.

Routine was a success again last night, no complaints when we put him to bed and only woke up twice in the night so fingers crossed we've cracked it (for now). Still wasn't willingly going to the bathroom for a bath at 7.30pm so I casually suggested he could help run it and put in bubbles (which daddy never does) and off he was like a shot mum win right there!

Anyone have any nice weekend plans (even though we still have Friday to go)? I need some inspiration!

Woohooo @squishymamma sounds like you've cracked it, long may it continue!

We are going to soft play tomorrow for ds which is very exciting because where we live there is no such thing. Hope he enjoys it

How is everyone?

Nothing exciting here to report, kids were up all night again. Kids went to school/nursery. My cleaning fairy MIL came up and we pulled everything out the kitchen cupboards, sorted and cleaned it all. Literally took all day but it's so much better.

Not sure on our plans for the weekend, as usual DH is working tomorrow morning.

Wow @Motherofmonsters you and your MIL are doing a fab deep clean job!

We're good, DS1 slept from 7pm to 8am last night - mind blown. Hoping he's not getting sick new routine seems to be working well. DS2 is being a bit fussy today so I've been trapped on the couch most of the day.

Feeling a bit guilty because DH is really noticing the lack of physical contact, which is his love language if you've heard of that (not sexual, just general hugs etc). But at the moment I seem to have at least one child on me during the day, all day every day, so when we finally get them both to bed I'm totally touched out and don't want any physical contact at all...bleh.

Good for you @motherofmonsters, a deep clean is good for the soul well makes you feel a bit better anyway!

@squishymamma glad the routine worked again. I know what you mean about being touched out, I really didn't realise it was a thing until ds. The last thing I want once he's in bed is dh hanging off me hugging me.

Its freezing here in France, was -3 most of the day which is baltic to us where we live the lowest it gets is about 13 degrees!

How is everyone today?

Not much news from here, it was football lesson this morning and touch wood we are remaining nit free.

We've been out each afternoon to the park or playground and to a national trust property this week and tiring the boys out whilst the weather has been dry and bright as DH has been off. I can't manage them both at places like that myself unless the playground is fenced.

Not really done anything creative, although we've played office a few times and done some magic painting. Boys are playing mostly with the imaginext superhero toys they have got.

Going to think of a few things to try to make this week. I have a box of bake your own solar system cupcakes in the cupboard, who knew there was such a thing!

DS1 has his ENT appointment this week. Touch wood we've been tonsillitis free since October now. I'm thinking the daily Sambucol (sambuca @squishymamma ) doses perhaps are helping. Hopefully he won't need a tonsilectomy now.

I've got to do a bit of work now and then quickly do some cleaning then we will see what this afternoon brings.

How is everyone feeling and how is the sleep going?

Glad to hear people have been getting out in the bright weather, and glad you're enjoying your trip Scots. Also glad to hear you're getting some rest with DS improved sleep Squishy!

I've had a better week too. Not easy, but better than last week! Still lots of massive tantrums from DD but not as many as last week hah. Health visitor also came on Thursday and weighed and measured her and that was all fine which is reassuring. She's dinky but seems to be growing ok. She weighed DS too who is still big and growing nicely. He is 3m and weighs more than DD did at 6m! He was practically double the size of a baby the same age that we saw at playgroup yesterday hah.

Thought I'd have a rest this PM and get some housework done as DH is out with DD (shoe shop and then to his DB's house) but DS has instead decided not to sleep and to cry non stop unless he's attached to the breast facepalm basically been trapped for like 2.5hrs...hes ok when we are out and about but at home all he wants to do is be attached to the breast or he just cries...DD was bottle fed by now, when does this behaviour end??

Love a good clean @Motherofmonsters, I pulled the sofa out the other day and hoovered properly underneath and disinfected, the amount of biscuit crumbs, dry cereal, car wheels etc that i found was unbelievable and rather embarrassing!

@Chocolatetrifle those solar system cakes sound fab!! We've attempted choc chip muffins today but DS wasn't really in the mood sadly. He happily ate one though!

My DS hasn't been himself today at all, quiet, tired, temperature. We were going to go to a national trust park but decided against it as he's really not himself and the weather has been chilly. It's meant to warm up a little next week.

Swimming last night which I'm going to try get back into the habit of going each week after nursery.

@PinkDaydreams hope your DS feels a bit better tomorrow. Hopefully he will have a good night.

Here's the solar system cakes, think I might attempt them tomorrow.

@SecondhandTable ah, how old is your DS now? Could he be a bit under the weather at all? Hope you get some sleep tonight.

Hope your DS is back to himself this morning @pinkdaydreams

We had a good day yesterday maybe the best we've had in a little while. Managed to make cakes with both DC in the morning with no fighting! DS did it properly with out mucking about. We managed to all sit down and eat lunch without the kids running around. Went to the park again with no incidents and then my brother and sister popped up after. Other than DS having a tired meltdown at the end of the day they went to bed without incident. Very very weird...

DH and DS are fitting the ladder to our loft so we can get the decorations back up. I'm doing puzzles with DD and then we're off to the PIL for a roast.

Sambuccol seems to be doing the trick here as well @chocolatetrifle they've both got a bit of a runny nose and the odd throat clear but they haven't developed that cough they had for months on end before Christmas. Hopefully I haven't spoken to soon.
Planet cakes look like they'll be fun to make

I picked up an orchard game in the charity shop called run, run as fast as you can! Can recommend it for older little ones, DS loves it and it's helping him get the idea of a more traditional board game

We've made the planet cakes!. Hope everyone has a good Sunday.

We've sorted out the danger cupboard of toys under the stairs, did the baking and MIL is coming for Sunday tea. FIL funeral has been fixed for early February now. Boys are playing Lego together also which is unbelievable, think we've only had one squabble all morning. Did the cleaning yesterday so just need to hoover throughout and can start the week a bit more organised.

Love the planet cakes! DD would love that. I just can't do anything with her atm though as DS is so clingy and doesn't really nap unless we are out grr.

We are going out for lunch shortly. Hopefully won't regret it. DS has just fallen asleep right before we are going which is typical. Hopefully he will go back off again in the pram. The cafe is v child friendly and my DPs are coming too so the kids are outnumbered by 2 adults so we should manage haha. Then just planning to bath both the kids and get some housework done tbh. I bought DD a baby shark bath bomb the other day, she's been asking for a bath bomb for ages so she is v excited about her upcoming bath haha.

Hi all!

Cakes look fab @Chocolatetrifle. Sounds like you've had a good and productive day. Have a lovely tea, hope your MIL is doing okay.

@SecondhandTable glad to hear everything is going well. Being boob trapped is a familiar feeling I'd say it comes and goes in waves but DS1 was breastfed until 18 months and I'd say he didn't really cluster feed after he started solids, so I'm sure you don't have too long left maybe he's going through a wee growth spurt? Hope he fell asleep again for you.

Hope your DS is feeling better today @PinkDaydreams. I haven't cleaned under my sofa since we moved here last June

We had a lovely day yesterday, went for a long walk in the forest. DS1 woke up at 5am and didn't have a long nap so he was a bit sensitive but we had a good time anyway. The bedtime routine seems to be working wonders, he's sleeping way better. Think it helps him to know his little brother is also in bed asleep so he's not the only one missing out!

Have had a lazy day today, just making bread for the week ahead and have put the chicken in the slow cooker for the roast - total game changer, saves so much space in the oven for other things!

Hope everyone has a good day

@squishymamma I love the love languages book. What's your language? Mine is Acts of Service.

@pompomsgalore my giving language is acts of service. Before kids I would have said my receiving one was physical touch but I'm not so certain any more maybe words of encouragement...

DH has come in tonight and casually told me the nursery he works in has an outbreak of threadworms then he got in a huff when I wasn't exactly thrilled with the situation (more my reactions and mood than the fact he thought it was great, haha). So now we're ignoring each other on opposite sides of the room.

DS1 has still been sleeping well and had a good day at nursery. But he's gotten into the stage of screaming blue murder if he doesn't get his way immediately and it infuriates me...there's been quite a lot of shouting lately my patience needs a lot of work!

@squishymamma Oh no to threadworms, I'd feel the same. I don't think I shouted before I had DS2, having two kids definitely was the catalyst to my patience vanishing. Don't be too hard on yourself.

Today we've tried our shed/playhouse and we've had the usual preschool routine. We sorted buttons and beads and made pictures.

Tomorrow I've got to get DS1 to his ENT appointment at hospital which I will probably have to bribe him with sweets to go to because he completely freaks out going anywhere near the doctor or hospital.

Button art, nothing too amazing but they enjoyed it

How is everyone?

Can anyone recommend any books about talking to prescholers about death. DS1 has just got quite upset before bed about his grandad and whilst I did my best to explain I wonder if a book would help? Has anyone any experience of this?

Sleep well everyone.

How is everyone?

We've had a sickness bug which has been fun but I think we're in the clear now.

I've been to a meeting with the school about DS, was positive in the sense we have an action plan for getting more help and they were very supportive. It's hard to hear about his troubles at school although none of it was a surprise.

Hope you are all okay @chococolatetrifle, it must be hard to explain to little ones.

Chocolate - so sorry for your loss, I don't know about books but think it's a good idea. Maybe post a thread in the children's books section for recommendations? I hope DS is doing ok?

Hope everyone's ok. I'm feeling down tbh, DS was not too difficult a newborn but as he's getting older (3m now) he's starting to cry a lot more - I always thought it was meant to be the other way around?! DD cried all the time for about 9 months though so I'm not sure what is normal. Also still having breastfeeding difficulties, I thought by 3 months it would be sorted but it's like one issue ends and another starts. The only thing stopping me from moving to bottle feeding really is that when he has his crying episodes which are becoming increasingly frequent at least sometimes the breast settles him even if it means sitting under him for hours on end. If I lose that I will probably struggle even more.