58 yo woman plots to overthrow the government

[shakingmytambourineatyou]

Right. I am now so sick of just about everything, the plots, the lies, the policies, that I am thinking of nipping down south (if there are any trains/tubes) and overthrowing the government. What will I need? Should I take sandwiches?

Also while you are there @shakingmytambourineatyou and your band of merry women can you sort of the carers allowance scandal please?

The present incumbent sees fit to pay carers like myself £60 a week for 35 hours work caring for our disabled children (whereas we all know it's 24 hours a day but they say it's a set rate of £60 for 35 hours so there you go)

Whereas if I was to employ someone to come to my home to do what I do I'd have to pay them at least minimum wage.

Funny that.

My 8 year old has written a letter to the government as she is sick of their silly behaviour.She was most incensed by the minister criticising females getting some good (previously male) film roles.All her parties were cancelled last Christmas and she didn't even complain.I'll bring her along-I think she could have a go at taking over as culture secretary!

Sadly my ridiculous body would be a barrier to barricade-wommaning type-revolting; but if the revolution needs someone to manage their social media presence…?

Furthermore, my cats have, after discussion, offered to donate some of their [stupidly expensive & fancy] food & treats to The Felines Of The Cause & for purposes of winning round Larry The Cat if someone can stop by (SE London) to collect…

My daddy’s a cousin who sits in the Lord’s, too, but he’s an English[ish] one we don’t actually know. Now might be the time to make his acquaintance though? (Possibly under pretext of sympathising about diabolical biopic ITV did about HIS daddy a few years ago )

DP has offered to help me make a pillory for the current cabinet to take turns in. Does anyone have a supply of over ripe fruit and veg?

Just putting my DMs, thermals and Big Coat on then I'll see you there. I will be bringing (in addition to my HRT and flask) by grumpy rescue dog. He is not a fan of anyone other then DH and women over the age of 45 (can put up with children if they don't look at him, so it's mainly just men he doesn't trust) and has a surprisingly loud bark and scary looking teeth. I thought we could be security (to make sure the bastards don't get back inside).

My policy suggestion is that you can only vote on decisions to take money away from someone (reducing benefits, free school meals, taking people etc) if you have a less money (carefully defined so no one can hide any away) than the people/businesses impacted. Probably needs refining but you get the idea...

I do as my neighbour keeps sharing Oddbox items that the have too many of and lately there has been a lot of kiwi fruit.

That was to @laughinggravy

Can we have a policy on hospital food being edible? What seems to happen now is a big company delivers trolley loads of crap heated to 3000 degrees, it is unloaded, wheeled round the wards, put in front of people, removed intact and thrown away. Even just a bit of soup and toast that actually got eaten would be less wasteful

That sounds awful.

@theelephantinthegroup

Just putting my DMs, thermals and Big Coat on then I'll see you there. I will be bringing (in addition to my HRT and flask) by grumpy rescue dog. He is not a fan of anyone other then DH and women over the age of 45 (can put up with children if they don't look at him, so it's mainly just men he doesn't trust) and has a surprisingly loud bark and scary looking teeth. I thought we could be security (to make sure the bastards don't get back inside).

My policy suggestion is that you can only vote on decisions to take money away from someone (reducing benefits, free school meals, taking people etc) if you have a less money (carefully defined so no one can hide any away) than the people/businesses impacted. Probably needs refining but you get the idea...

I've also got an elderly, bad-tempered cat called Alan who is keen to come and support the revolution. Alan bit my husband on the scrotum once, so I have no doubt that his skill set will prove invaluable.

shreddednips

@Laughingravy

DP has offered to help me make a pillory for the current cabinet to take turns in. Does anyone have a supply of over ripe fruit and veg?

I have some defrosted razor clams, will that work?

I can save some money. As someone volunteered me for Home Secretary (I will need to learn to spell that) I can save a shed-load on crime. Community policing with community supports, proper housing, work with my esteemed colleagues in Education and Social Care to reduce offending. No prison time for any victimless crimes (stop locking non-violent people up). Good community based, small scale projects with skilled staff to rehab people.

Legalise and tax the shit out of ethically grown drugs (therefore getting taxes and getting rid of gangs AND cartels). Addiction services and MH services meaning less emergency care (which costs a sodding fortune). Addiction and the crime around it reduces.

Work with my esteemed colleagues in Housing to get rid of zombie homes, therefore freeing up thousands of apartments in cities for people to move into. Fund the shit out of DV services and rehome men who do it and women who want to leave it. That's a bucket load of money for the police, who will be trained in all sorts of practical things like connecting people with services and that will be funded by stopping the silly training in Prosecuting Naughty Women they sometimes get now. More police on the streets, who know the place and the people. Massive look at institutionalised sexism.

Also rejoin the EU which will get us some cash but I don't think that's my department.

DS wanted to volunteer me for cub leader when he was in cubs because "when you get cross, Mum, you get really cross". So I think I'd be very qualified for giving Johnson, Gove, Patel, Raab and Rees Mogg a good Talking To before sending them to sit on the naughty step. Also for getting rid of any pesky cops or soldiers who dare to try to stop us taking over.

@user1471453601

I can bring the following : two walking sticks and one walker.

Can I come? I d be a much better Home Secretary or foreign Secretary. I'm not up to Health Secretary or PM.

But on the other hand, neither are the present incumbents

I'm in. I'll bring my crutches and a cute fluffy dog to charm the press. I wanted to be PM when I was 10 (yes, really...) Then I realised I was a. a girl. b. at a comprehensive 'school' c. in a sexist, elitist, racist UK So, I lost all hope / confidence I could ever make a difference.

But, honestly, at least I'd be honestly not quite up to scratch.
Unlike this bunch of totally incompetant sociopaths

I want them to stop allowing developers to build on Greenland and to start planting trees instead of chopping them down.

I’ll come brandishing a shovel. For tree planting purposes only, of course! 🌲 🌳

I love this thread. Cheering me right up as having a shitty day working in Children's Services in a local authority.

Sorry sniggering at The Cayenne Islands

@GreeboIsMySpiritAnimal

Does it have a title, *@Double3xposure*?

My apologies, I missed off the title, which is

Wild women of a certain age

You can see why I was reminded of it by this thread 😀

I have just signed a petition asking IOPC toInvestigate Met Police For Failing to Stop/investigate 2020 Downing Street party
Bearing in mind they were stopping small weddings and vigils for murdered women at the time.

[quote ablutiions]@Purplewithred you can take the NHS as long as you promise to de-politicise it's funding (after giving it a massive increase and stopping /reversing the privatisation)

[/quote]
This was my plan all along. Would you like to be Vice with me? I've always wanted to have Vice in my title.

@MrsTerryPratchett

I can save some money. As someone volunteered me for Home Secretary (I will need to learn to spell that) I can save a shed-load on crime. Community policing with community supports, proper housing, work with my esteemed colleagues in Education and Social Care to reduce offending. No prison time for any victimless crimes (stop locking non-violent people up). Good community based, small scale projects with skilled staff to rehab people.

Legalise and tax the shit out of ethically grown drugs (therefore getting taxes and getting rid of gangs AND cartels). Addiction services and MH services meaning less emergency care (which costs a sodding fortune). Addiction and the crime around it reduces.

Work with my esteemed colleagues in Housing to get rid of zombie homes, therefore freeing up thousands of apartments in cities for people to move into. Fund the shit out of DV services and rehome men who do it and women who want to leave it. That's a bucket load of money for the police, who will be trained in all sorts of practical things like connecting people with services and that will be funded by stopping the silly training in Prosecuting Naughty Women they sometimes get now. More police on the streets, who know the place and the people. Massive look at institutionalised sexism.

Also rejoin the EU which will get us some cash but I don't think that's my department.

As Health Secretary I also strongly support legalising and taxing ethically grown drugs, and lots of money on addiction/MH services but best if we just get on with it rather than run the idea past PIL first as it will only cause a bad atmosphere at Christmas Dinner.

As Health Secretary I also strongly support legalising and taxing ethically grown drugs, and lots of money on addiction/MH services but best if we just get on with it rather than run the idea past PIL first as it will only cause a bad atmosphere at Christmas Dinner.

Fair enough. I'm thinking we fund some Afghan and Columbian Women's collectives for the farming. Overseas Investment anyone? I think someone wanted fun trips to sunny climes.

We can highly tax ex politicians on the money they make off the back of being MPs. So Boris Johnson, Tony Blair etc charging a fortune for speaking and giving lectures etc. taxed at 90%.

I second the tombola and raffle idea. Also raise money by having those we overthrow in the stocks for people to throw rotten fruit at. Or we could sell them to I’m A Celeb?