Embarrassing crush on my electrician

[gelatodipistacchio]

He is lovely and sweet and has been very friendly and interested seeming in a way that is probably just professional.

He just finished a job (which requires some follow up) and wrote this:

(...) Please don’t hesitate to get in touch at any time and as many times you want if you got questions. We’ll keep in touch

I'm naturally prim and proper. I feel that any overture I could make (like suggesting a coffee???) would be exceptionally awkward and similar to a gross dude who hits on his cocktail waitress.

What to do, what to do?

@StellarDella I'm pretty sure this isn't right. He was clear about prices upfront and part of the reason I like him is because I think he is a honest and decent sort. His check a trade reviews suggest the same. He's been super respectful. But we'll see when the final bill rolls in!

@TotallyWipedout yes, it seems clear that if he was in a relationship that recently and has a small child, i should avoid, avoid, avoid.

@StellarDella

No offence but he's clearly eyed you up as a soft target and will be fleecing you.

Oooo we have a jealous poster!

@PAFMO

How inappropriate. Would you be gushing had someone you didn't find attractive had sent such a message? Do you think it was a front cover of a novel lurve thing or that he tries to get his rocks off with all his clients?

I don’t get this at all. What on earth is inappropriate about fancying someone and considering how to possibly let them know you’re interested? How do people ever manage to get together without doing this? What a bizarre comment.

@PAFMO

How inappropriate. Would you be gushing had someone you didn't find attractive had sent such a message? Do you think it was a front cover of a novel lurve thing or that he tries to get his rocks off with all his clients?

Ridiculous comment

The East London and Kent thing is a bit of a red herring. There are numerous places that are in London but have a Kent postcode.

@VitalsStable it's definitely not the same place. I know his postcode and it's nowhere near Kent

He asked if he could do some annual electrician assessment at my home, which means he needs to come tomorrow and then on Monday.

I would have wanted to know exactly what this assessment entailed and who would be carrying out this assessment before handing over keys to an empty property.

@ShrinkingViolet9 what do you think he's going to do to it? .

[quote gelatodipistacchio]@ShrinkingViolet9 what do you think he's going to do to it? .[/quote]
That's not the point.

Whether it's heating engineers, gas fitters or electricians, and irrespective of whether I've known and used them for years or for a short period only, it is not unreasonable to enquire why an "annual assessment" is being carried out in a customer's home and who will be carrying out the assessment.

For example:

professional-electrician.com/features/a-niceic-day-for-an-assessment/

I honestly still don't see the issue

He did loads of testing on Saturday. I was in the house anyway cleaning and stuff, as were a bunch of other workers. I think he's essentially doing what is set out in this link. He sent me some certificates yesterday.

@gelatodipistacchio

I honestly still don't see the issue

He did loads of testing on Saturday. I was in the house anyway cleaning and stuff, as were a bunch of other workers. I think he's essentially doing what is set out in this link. He sent me some certificates yesterday.

All electricians have to provide certificates for those parts of their work for which certificates are required.

But in earlier posts, you were talking about his need for a key in order to access your property for an "annual electrician assessment" and "exam".

So I am unsure what your understanding is of "annual electrician assessment" and "exam" and the provision of standard electrical certificates which are left with the customers or whether you mean safety check certificates for landlords.

OP if you need help with deciding what he is doing is above board. Let me know.

I actually needed to talk to him about something and I showed up when the assessment was meant to be over, but it was just beginning. I therefore got on with some cleaning. It was definitely all above board. (Btw the inspector said he did a great job, which I could tell - he's very meticulous and spoke intelligently about his work).

I heard the inspector mention his young family, and when the inspector left, i said, oh, do you have children too?

He does! He didn't say anything more about his family other than agreeing that they are very sweet at that age (2 and 4).

There's my answer! Realistically, I think that there is chemistry between us and I am going to assume that he likes me and thinks I am nice, but his intention was always to be professional.

Ah, well.

All I'm trying to say is this:

If an electrician asks for a key to access a property for an "annual electrician assessment" or "exam", I do not think it unreasonable to establish the nature and purpose of that visit and who else would be on the premises while this "annual electrician assessment" or "exam" is being carried out.

It doesn't seem to me that you are very certain about what the visit was for i.e. whether it was for a periodic assessment of the electrician's standard of work (eg renewal of Corgi or Gas Safe registration); or for provision of the standard electrical work certificates that are left with the customer; or to carry out a landlord's periodic safety check on a rented property; or for an inspection by the company for whom he works.

I know it's not relevant to the topic of this thread - I'm just surprised that you don't seem to know what access was required for on this occasion.

Cross posted with OP's updates about his kids.

I mean the bottom line is that he told me enough to satisfy me that it was for a legitimate reason. I offered to give him the key. I'm going to change the locks when i finish these works anyway.

I think you maybe have limerence.

@ShrinkingViolet9 i think that's the technical term for a crush!

Now that it's confirmed he has a family, and this work is largely done, I will put the crush behind me.

It's only disappointing because it's very rare for me to be attracted to someone. I've also gone through utter hell with my ex, who is now paired up and acting like a family with his girlfriend (and my daughter). It's obvious why I would develop a crush and crave affection at this stage.

Day ruined, honestly 🤦🏼‍♀️ I think it is very normal to have a crush on these types of people without it going any further. I remember at my work (where there were very few men) everyone used to get excited over technical guys or workmen coming in to fix something 😂 It was utterly tragic but because there was nothing else to do they seemed way more attractive than I’d probably find them now. You’ll forget all about him, just need to find a few nice guys to go on dates with to get over your ex

Ahhhhh, I was rooting for him being single and you both sailing off for your happily ever after

I feel your frustration. I have a MASSIVE crush on my gas engineer, to the point my brain is doing bedroom gymnastics whilst my face is trying to maintain a neutral position whilst he enthusiastically explains some button on my boiler (not a euphemism 🤣).
He is simply gorgeous, oh and very happily married to a wonderful lady and a beautiful child.
I’m mid 40’s and like you am not attracted to many people so find this even more frustrating. I just enjoy the moment.

Here’s sending you some luck to finding an attractive available man soon to break up the loneliness.

@sarah13xx @RosieLemonadeAndSugar

Sorry to disappoint!!! Maybe this is a sign of things to come, my subconscious kick-starting me into finding love.

@Blackwidow47 thanks! I'm sorry you know the pleasure and the pain. I literally wanted to lurch forward and kiss this guy, so weird.

Placemarking !