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Original poster

How many immediate family members do you have?

134 replies

HazieDazie · 26/10/2021 22:47

I was talking to a friend earlier and they commented that my situation is unusual…

I’m 51, my husband is 57 and between us we have….

My mum and me (my dad died 17 years ago)
My husband (his parents died over 40 years ago, no siblings)

So essentially there is just the 3 of us. I do have cousins on my mums side but no family on dads side and DH has no other family. Neither of us have children.

Are we unusual?

OP posts:
shiningcuckoo · 27/10/2021 03:02

2 children. That's it. Parents dead, no siblings, divorced.

RumHoney · 27/10/2021 03:18

Fairly small. I have a dad, a sister and two nephews (she is separated, my mum died a few years ago). A grandmother and two childless uncles

OH is an only child but has both parents. He has aunts/uncles/cousins but doesn't see them much (a handful of times in the 10 years we've been together). No grandparents.

No kids

Madwife123 · 27/10/2021 03:25

I’ve got my mum, my dad and my sister.

However I haven’t seen any of them in years as my parents were abusive and my sister has moved away and cut contact with the family, the same as I did a few years later.

I do seem to be in a minority for having no close family however when I speak to friends etc.

Interested in this thread?

Then you might like threads about this subject:

Families
Jumpingintochristmas · 27/10/2021 03:37

DH snd I are lucky to still have both sets of parents and I have an elderly grandparent. We have 3 DC.
We have five siblings between us and all have significant others and 2 DN- however we don’t have contact with one of DH’s siblings (they rarely see PIL too).

Definitely more than a lot of people have, we are lucky.

torquewench · 27/10/2021 03:57

I still have both parents, also a DB. None of whom seem too bothered about keeping in touch. Had a milestone birthday this year. On the day I got a one line text from DB asking what I was doing. Didn't even wish me happy birthday. Parents haven't visited my home in about 4 years.

GertietheGherkin · 27/10/2021 04:16
  • myself and
NadiaVulvokov · 27/10/2021 05:16

Bop, not unusual. One in-law left; both mid-forties.

starrynight21 · 27/10/2021 06:19

I've just got 1 sister.
2 children.
1 husband.

My parents are both gone, and they were both only children, so I've never had aunts, uncles, cousins.

We emigrated when I was young, so we didn't even have any distant family around us. We were quite literally a family of four, nobody else. I used to fantasise about having other family, but no luck !

ScamTheSchool · 27/10/2021 06:32

Family that were regularly in touch with on DH's side parents, brother, sister in law. On my side parents. We both have cousins, DH has 2 who he sees at funerals, I've no idea how many I have and it must be at least 15 years since I've seen any of them.

I think in your situation, I'd seriously consider moving somewhere more accessible.

Fernhilde · 27/10/2021 06:44

One parent, and a sibling in Australia.

Waxonwaxoff0 · 27/10/2021 06:46

I have my mum and my DS. I'm divorced, no siblings and NC with my dad. I have a lot of wider family who I'm close with though - aunts, uncles, cousins.

HildegardeCrowe · 27/10/2021 06:48

Yes agree with @ScamTheSchool that you should consider moving and would say that if you had friends you’d feel less lonely. Do you have a dog? Great way to meet people!

I’m divorced and have one child, a 90 year old mum and two siblings and see them all regularly but consider it a very small family. I have second degree relatives abroad who I don’t see but a couple of whom I’m in touch with.

DinosApple · 27/10/2021 07:02

That sounds hard OP.
I have a large extended family (cousins, aunts, great aunts) and when my grandparents were alive we saw them all almost weekly after church for a cup of tea. A huge mix of ages and it was lovely. Life happened, and now I see them very rarely.

My immediate family consists of DM, DDad, DBr, DGM, DH, DD1, DD2, BIL.

Mine and DH's brothers have no children so it is very different for my DC growing up. I regret that I shall never be a Great Aunt, my childhood was full of them!

Umbongoumbongo999 · 27/10/2021 07:11

I have 15 close relatives, siblings, aunts and uncles and first cousins, including my dh and 3dc. I see around 10 of them regularly.

Dh has 60 relatives with the same degree of closeness. Adding in the aunts/uncles by marriage and the children of cousins there are over 100. He still has both parents and we see them regularly. Of the rest, we see them at big family events, usually every year or so ( there are a lot of family events!). It is a sight to behold when the whole family are together.

I think it is harder for big families like my dh's to stay in close contact. There is more geographic spread and more age spread across the cousins with the oldest being 50 and the youngest just 20.

TheShades · 27/10/2021 07:13

I have both parents, 1 grandparent and 1 sibling, plus lots of aunts, uncles and cousins I have various levels of contact with.

DH has one parent and one sibling. They aren't in contact with his uncle and cousins.

TheShades · 27/10/2021 07:14

Plus we have 2 DC.

RampantIvy · 27/10/2021 07:16

Doesn't it depend how old you are?
DH and I are in our 60s. We have our DD and one sibling each, and no-one left in the generation above us.

DH has several cousins, but he is only close to one of them, but he lives about 6 hours away.

I talk to my cousins (I have 5) on the phone occasionally but don't see them regularly as they live too far away. I get on well with them. We have 5 nephews and nieces.

We live nowhere near our families, so Christmas is always rather quiet and boring.

dudsville · 27/10/2021 07:18

I have, alive in total = 10. I have close relationships and speak and see regularly with 3 of them. The rest I may it may not have an email or a phone can about once a year but there's no relationship.

My partner has alive in total, 4, but there no relationship and they meet up onky at Christmas.

My oh is very social and has a large group of friends. I'm very much an introvert but also have a nice group of friends, but I do speak to my 3 family members regularly too.

MinnieMountain · 27/10/2021 07:19

On my side it’s my DF and 4 siblings, only one of whom I see regularly.

My DM was adopted and her brothers wanted nothing to do with her once their parents died.

We have DS, 4 nephews and one nephew on the way.

DH has both parents, one grandparent, brother, 8 aunts/uncles and 17 first cousins.

We only see most of them at weddings as they’re spread all over the world.

kowari · 27/10/2021 07:21

By blood, grandparents, parents, aunts, uncles, siblings, cousins, children and niblings, 14.

Iamtheweedonkey · 27/10/2021 07:29

My mum and both parent in laws, all grandparents are dead. I have my dad, rarely see. I have my 2 dB and their families, see 2/3 times a year. My family is my DH and 3 DC.

SlamLikeAGuitar · 27/10/2021 07:32

I class my DH, our 3 DC’s, my parents, my sister, DH’s mum & stepdad and DH’s maternal grandma as immediate family.
I have an enormous extended family though - my mum is one of 5 DCs, all of which have multiple DCs, and most of them also have multiple DCs. Boxing Day at my eldest aunt’s house could probably do with hiring in some crowd control Blush

ApplesAreTheBaneOfMyLife · 27/10/2021 07:35

In my side there is just me, my brother and my very elderly parents. I have 2 children, but I’m pretty certain my brother will never have any. No aunts, uncles, cousins, or anyone else.

FlatStanletta · 27/10/2021 07:42

This is like DH’s family. He is the only child AND only grandchild on both his Mum and Dad’s side. He does have his mum, dad (who we barely see), and an aunt we see regularly. Plus we have 3 DC.

I have 2 siblings plus mum and dad and a lot of cousins and aunts and uncles although only a handful we see more than at weddings / funerals etc.

JurgensCakeBaby · 27/10/2021 07:42

DH, DS, both my parents, his parents, DB SIL 2DNs. I have one grandma left and 5 sets of aunts and uncles on DMs side and 4 cousins plus their spouses and 4 children, on DFs side I have no grandparents left on DFs side 4 sets of aunts and uncles left, 8 cousins and they all have spouses and 17 children. DH is an only but has one grandfather left, two sets of aunts and uncles 4 cousins 3 of whom have spouses and 2 children between them. We have contact with all of them at least a few times a year, some of my DMs family we are especially close to and see very regularly, we see my parents, DHs parents every week and DB and his family 3/4 times a month. It's a fairly big family! However maybe because of that when I say immediate family I'd mean our grandparents, parents, my sibling SIL and DNs, rather than the many aunts, uncles, cousins and children (2nd cousins?)

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