I’m going to have to give up work due to no childcare

[NoChildCareNoJob]

Single parent to DD aged 7.

No family help at all. ExH won’t help in the week at all.

School wraparound is full with no space, waiting list closed with over 100 children on it.

The two local Nurseries with wraparounds that drop at DDs school are full with no waiting lists as they don’t operate them.

The two childminders that go to DDs school have no space.

It’s a recurring theme around the area, with schools and private Nurseries full often with bulge classes and/or waiting lists.

I’m currently working 10am-3pm around the schoolrun but core hours are 8am-3.30pm, so I need wraparound. I’ve been given until after half term (next week) to sort it out and switch back to core hours. I work 3 days a week.

I don’t earn enough for a Nanny, and I literally have no-one else to help me. Live in a tiny 2 bed flat and go to the office 1 day a week so can’t easily have DD here while I work. The holiday club she goes to only operates in school holidays so no solution there either.

What an earth can I do other than giving up my job? I worked so hard for it after I split with ExH (due to his violence and control) I feel like I’m losing that part of me. I’ve been searching for term time only school hours jobs but they’re few and far between too.

So any suggestions while I write my resignation letter?

Could you do shorter hours over more days? i.e. the equivalent of 3 days hours spread over 4 shorter days to enable you to do the school run.
It's a rubbish situation to be in, i totally feel for you but it does sound like you've explored all options does you DD have a friend who's mum might be willing to help you out (maybe for a small fee?)
If you're near a university or college then a student might be a cheaper option than a nanny.

Could you ask for reduced hours (school hours only) at your current place of work?
If you have holiday club in the holidays then you don't necessarily need term-time only, that might widen the pool a little.
If you leave would you be applying for benefits until you find something else? You might want to get advice on this, as if you resign you may not be able to make a claim for a while.

What time do you need childcare from? I start work at 8, and finding someone (anyone!) who will work from 7.30 has been hard.
Student? Retired person looking for a bit more cash? Friends mum who could do with some extra cash?
Spreading your hours over more days could be a good try, if it is the difference between resigning and staying.
Good luck, its horrid, isnt it.

@emmathedilemma

Could you do shorter hours over more days? i.e. the equivalent of 3 days hours spread over 4 shorter days to enable you to do the school run. It's a rubbish situation to be in, i totally feel for you but it does sound like you've explored all options does you DD have a friend who's mum might be willing to help you out (maybe for a small fee?) If you're near a university or college then a student might be a cheaper option than a nanny.

I will look into whether it's something my manager would be willing to consider thank you.

It's the kind of area where most people work and use childcare so I mostly see grandparents on the schoolrun. I will ask around though, it's worth a shot.

@AwkwardPaws27

Could you ask for reduced hours (school hours only) at your current place of work? If you have holiday club in the holidays then you don't necessarily need term-time only, that might widen the pool a little. If you leave would you be applying for benefits until you find something else? You might want to get advice on this, as if you resign you may not be able to make a claim for a while.

I'd have to apply for benefits yes, I do get a UC top up, but will look into whether that would be affected if I resign.

@InTheLabyrinth

What time do you need childcare from? I start work at 8, and finding someone (anyone!) who will work from 7.30 has been hard. Student? Retired person looking for a bit more cash? Friends mum who could do with some extra cash? Spreading your hours over more days could be a good try, if it is the difference between resigning and staying. Good luck, its horrid, isnt it.

The school wraparound opens at 7am, and the two nurseries open at 7.15am, so I'd be covered, I'd need it from about 7.15am on office day and 7.45am on WFH days.

You poor thing, I do sympathise. I had to give up a PGCE for similar reasons. Does DD have close friends whose mums would help in the morning? I did when I was a SAHP, just until the other mum could get something sorted. Plead with work for an hour's leeway in the afternoon or are there any after school activities she could do? Mine did various clubs, drama, choir, sports etc straight after school.
The only other thing I can think of is a local teenager or childcare student.

Ask on school FB group if anyone wants childcare on the 2 days you don’t work in return for doing 2 days for you?
Then you only have one day to sort which might be easier.

Ask about changing hours over more days etc otherwise I would start applying for more jobs.
There's a lot of flexible companies out there.

Ask anyone and everyone of they know someone willing to be with your DD before and after school, Facebook, Facebook groups, word of mouth- ask all the parents in her class/brownies/swimming if they know of anyone who might be suitable.

It's hard- I've been there. For a year different parents were happy to collect DS after school and take him to their house. By the time they got home, I was usually on my way home. I felt like I was living on the edge, but when you're desperate you do what you have to.

I know of a couple of families who are employ someone to take children to school and collect them - both have people grown up children but don't want to work full time, so it suits them.

Are you close with any of the mum's at school?
I'm self employed and work from home. Always have. For the last 5 years, I've dropped off my son's friend (and now his little brother) to school on a Thursday and Friday morning. They get dropped iff here at 7 30. I collect them on a Monday and keep them till after dinner.

We are similar here; very little wrap around care available and she just couldnt find anyone for those days. Her youngest used to have full days in nursery but when he started school, i just take him and collect him too.
Is there anyone who would help you like that?

I would ask to do your hours over 4-5 days instead.

Id ask if you can split over 4 /5 days firstly. If you have made it clear you are on the waiting lists for all childcare options, they might be more flexible to sort this.

Ultimately, if you have to resign, consider becoming a childminder given how in demand in your area it is.

@MargosKaftan

Id ask if you can split over 4 /5 days firstly. If you have made it clear you are on the waiting lists for all childcare options, they might be more flexible to sort this.

Ultimately, if you have to resign, consider becoming a childminder given how in demand in your area it is.

I can't be a childminder sadly, I have a small two bed flat open plan living/kitchen/dinner and barely enough space for DD and I let alone 3-4 other toddlers. Sadly! Although it would solve my issues with childcare.

@ImUninsultable

Are you close with any of the mum's at school? I'm self employed and work from home. Always have. For the last 5 years, I've dropped off my son's friend (and now his little brother) to school on a Thursday and Friday morning. They get dropped iff here at 7 30. I collect them on a Monday and keep them till after dinner.

We are similar here; very little wrap around care available and she just couldnt find anyone for those days. Her youngest used to have full days in nursery but when he started school, i just take him and collect him too.
Is there anyone who would help you like that?

I mostly see grandparents on the school run but will ask around. I don't really know any of the other parents due to covid, last time I saw them properly was March of year 1.

I advertised on Gumtree. Got a really nice young Spanish woman to collect after school. This was when my DD was in reception and couldn't do after school club. As soon as she was eligible she was in after school care until 6pm.
Cost quite a bit but got me out of a hole.

No advice, but I just hope that all the people who normally rock up to single mum threads and blithely chirp “Why haven’t you got a job?” are reading this, because they just do not seem to have a fucking clue how difficult it is.

Especially over these last couple of years, when you’d never start a week knowing if you’d get to the end of it without school closing/ bubbles closing/ your kids having to self isolate/ your lift share buddy’s kids having to self isolate/ everything going into total lockdown again/ after school clubs just….evaporating “because Covid” etc etc etc etc.

Meanwhile the useless men we procreated with are just sailing through life choosing to be utterly oblivious to the whole thing.

I am self employed, so have been managing to keep some work going, but it’s been on a go- slow for so long.

When will your daughter turn 8 ? Childminders have strict ratios for under 8's but not over. If she's soon going to be turning 8 I'd be asking the childminders for a space then and in the mean time you'll have to juggle or ask around at school if any of the mums can help you to tide you over. Also have you asked other local schools if they have any wrap around spaces.

I think people have had success with www.childcare.co.uk on here.

@glitterelf

When will your daughter turn 8 ? Childminders have strict ratios for under 8's but not over. If she's soon going to be turning 8 I'd be asking the childminders for a space then and in the mean time you'll have to juggle or ask around at school if any of the mums can help you to tide you over. Also have you asked other local schools if they have any wrap around spaces.

She's only just 7, end of July so almost a year I need to manage for.

@crackofdoom

No advice, but I just hope that all the people who normally rock up to single mum threads and blithely chirp “Why haven’t you got a job?” are reading this, because they just do not seem to have a fucking clue how difficult it is.

Especially over these last couple of years, when you’d never start a week knowing if you’d get to the end of it without school closing/ bubbles closing/ your kids having to self isolate/ your lift share buddy’s kids having to self isolate/ everything going into total lockdown again/ after school clubs just….evaporating “because Covid” etc etc etc etc.

Meanwhile the useless men we procreated with are just sailing through life choosing to be utterly oblivious to the whole thing.

I am self employed, so have been managing to keep some work going, but it’s been on a go- slow for so long.

Thats the reason I'm being told there's no space anywhere "because of covid meaning we have to have less children".

Meanwhile ExH never has to worry about his working hours, and doesn't even provide a room for her as his bloody mother does that.

Sorry rant over.

I would echo posting on childcare.co.uk when I was a student I did some nursery pick ups and found the work on there

I'd definitely get back in touch with the two childminders you've spoken to and ask to be on the waiting list. I'd also advise that you go onto your local family information service as lots of childminders will be listed there and childcare.co.uk. Not all childminders list the schools they cover. Where I am I have 4 primary schools all under a mile and as far as I'm aware I am one of two childminders listed for the schools but know there are more childminders in the area.

If it’s only 1 day a week you need childcare for then I’d ask the local college/6th form to see if anyone studying childcare would be able to take your LO to school and back.

The other 2 days I would ask if you are able to take your breaks during school pick up and drop off instead of having them at the normal time.

You can’t just give up your job. UC will make you work and you won’t be so lucky to WFH 2 days a week, so you’ll end up being in a worse position.

You could look to see if any other jobs are hiring for school hours but I’d do this as a last resort.

@toocold54

If it’s only 1 day a week you need childcare for then I’d ask the local college/6th form to see if anyone studying childcare would be able to take your LO to school and back.

The other 2 days I would ask if you are able to take your breaks during school pick up and drop off instead of having them at the normal time.

You can’t just give up your job. UC will make you work and you won’t be so lucky to WFH 2 days a week, so you’ll end up being in a worse position.

You could look to see if any other jobs are hiring for school hours but I’d do this as a last resort.

I need 3 days childcare because even on my WFH days I can't guarentee I'll be available, our breaks change daily due to meetings and calls with clients. I also need quiet when on calls, which isn't possible in a small 2 bed flat.

So I need childcare 3 days a week, I could probably survive on breakfast club only though as I finish technically at 3.30pm (when school finishes) but I only live 10 minutes walk so I reckon I could finish at 3.15 and catch up on 15 mins after bedtime.