60. I am never going to feel like an adult, am I?

[Orangejuicemarathoner]

Maybe no one ever does, and everyone else is just better at pretending than I am!

To me it would be understanding politics, having a clean enough house for unexpected visitors, knowing how to make myself look smart and sophisticated, eating and sleeping at sensible times, regularly.

But maybe, there are adults who do all those things and still don't feel like an adult, and think the things I have done are more adulty!

Or maybe we are actually all fully adult, and part of being fully adult is wondering if everyone else is more adult than you are....

I can relate. I also feel like a child with “women’s things” like hair and makeup. I’m still trying to work those out whereas lots of women seem to get the hang of them in their teens and twenties.

Haha. I'm always 15 in my head.

@SeaShoreGalore

Probably all the proper adults aren’t wasting their evenings on mumsnet. They’re writing reports to get ahead at work, or sorting out their budget, or some such.

Haha - This!

Not really an adult, 52 here. But not in the "childlike sense of wonder" way more the "how do you pay taxes/drive/renew passports/deal with UCAS" way. In that way I still feel 13 years old. I envy people who don't think those things are a big deal!

I think I've always felt grown up, I find it tiring always being the grown up. I think my daughter is the same, I mentioned a story about when she was seven the other day and she said "Don't be ridiculous, I've always been twenty one". She's actually fifteen. 🤷🏻‍♀️

@AliceWo * whole I understand and control my emotions - that's enough for me to feel like an adult..

Yep that sums up adulthood behaviour.

I'm just short of 64 and have always felt immature, often when I compare myself with people much younger than myself.

I feel exactly the same. Nearly 50, I'm not immature but I feel like I've not moved on from the anxieties and feelings of inadequacies I had as a teenager. I never feel adulty despite looking my age 😁However, I am 99% sure I have inattentive ADD amd being overwhelmed by responsibility and authority are very much part of that.

I am 61 and still not grown up really. In fact I recently bought a soft toy - remember Lucifer the evil cat from Cinderella? I was looking through Amazon and saw a soft cuddly toy version and thought why not?.

I (only half) jokingly asked my friend to come with me (as a responsible adult) to help me choose a mobile phone as I am clueless about tech.

I think it is because I a single and childless so only have my self to worry about (and indulge) though I am sure there are plenty of grown up singletons out there!

I did manage to look after my mum when she was diagnosed with bowel cancer and was already immobile and try to sort out my Aunt's finances so I am not completely hopeless!!!

Be careful what you wish for.... after adult comes old age. And old age is not for cissies..

I came into adulthood very early in life sue to family issues. Youthis precious

But somehow Ihave never lost my sense wonder at small things that delight.

So responsibility etc and coping easily perforce with often hard adulting is tempered with love of flowers and sunrise and cats.

Be happy wherever you are at before is vanishes

Wow, my DSis's partner is like this not adult at 58. Disorganised, late unable to commit to plans. Dd also has a friend whose Mum is like this....I'd say I've been am adult since my late 20's (mid forties now). There is little tolerance for unadult behaviour in my line of work.

@SquirrelFan

Not really an adult, 52 here. But not in the "childlike sense of wonder" way more the "how do you pay taxes/drive/renew passports/deal with UCAS" way. In that way I still feel 13 years old. I envy people who don't think those things are a big deal!

Me too. I have never felt like a 'proper person' (childhood caused huge problems) I wonder if I ever will. I am trying. Really hard. I think @AliceWo 's definition of Adult is really interesting.

@Deathraystare, we must be related! In my 60's but child free I finally got to grips with adulting when my DM went into dementia. Now I can deal with house improvements, pensions, tax , I even have a will but I still don't feel like a real adult.

I think it’s more of an attitude than an age thing, some people (like my sister) have been grown up since they were children. Whereas as I’m still waiting at 37. Although I also don’t have a lot if the ‘markers’ of grown up life - no mortgage, no husband, no children so to some people I’ll probably never be a real adult.

I used to look at my parents and think that adult life was so boring and serious, but I realise that’s just their personalities. Also, they both left school at 15 and went straight into working, whereas I spent my 20’s travelling around the world and partying, then went to University (more partying), so different experiences I guess.

I do love the autonomy of being a grown up, I can have cereal for dinner and nobody gives out to me .

A few days ago my best friend and I cycled down to the beach, put our feet in the water and splashed around, collected shells and then got ice creams, so we still do silly fun things and probably will even when we’re elderly.

I think mentally everyone is stuck in their 20's/30's for their whole life. When you are young you see older people and think they must 'feel' old too but it's just not the case!

None of the things you mention are ‘adult’ IMO.

Know what you mean though!

Yes definitely feel like this

Mind you, i think some folk are born 60

Does anyone else have a moment of panic when their DC asks permission to do something?

Bookmark are you me?!!! I'm the same!!!

I’m the lone adult. At 4 years old I felt like the adult. I would have to advise my DM how to do things sensibly, not to put hot coffee down near baby and such.

I'm 60 in a couple of years, I have a tidy house and love talking about politics but .....

Have just passed by CBT test and bought myself a motorbike and hope to get a bigger one in a couple of years and go riding around Europe.

I wear little tartan mini-skirts and docs and borrow my teenager's clothes. I spent a recent weekend away with some other middle aged (or are we old now) woman and was bored shitless of talk of Nancy next door's husband's new job.

I still play hockey every week, Nearly had a scrap in a bar the other week. Love dressing up at ComicCom conferences.

Fuck I NEVER want to be an adult!

Does anyone find that over the years you get a set of friends but they start to get old and their interests start to change to things like listening to the cricket or talking about their pension etc and you start to go low contact with them and then you find younger people who you get on with better and then they go the same way as the first set. Etc etc
I have started to not have contact with a couple of people I called friends when amongst other things they started to talk about holidays I would associate with being old and just the general conversation became like I was talking to an elderly neighbour.

No idea what age or where any future friends are going to come from as they were a decade or more younger than me to begin with

53 here. I wing doing 'adult stuff' when I have to, but still feel about 17 in my head and my sagging face is a shock in the mirror. Moderately organised but never managed the perfect home or good career.

But happy. Rubbing my dogs belly makes me (and her) happy. Paddling down the river on a kayak gives me the same joy it did as a child . Building lego with little children at work.. love it!

I think it's a personality thing.. I have four (adult) children. One is a perma child in his outlook, one was born competent and I'm in awe of her.. the other two are winging it

I'm friends with young 20 somethings and people older than me. I can relate to most ages. I'm the age i am and thats it. Some folk didn't get the chance to be my age so I'm not complaining. I'm also not pretending to be younger and more interesting than i am. Now thats sad.