Shy dd been chosen to sit next to loud, disruptive child. Should I say something?

[life9000]

My dd is at primary school and very shy. Her first day back was yesterday and she had a good day.
One thing she told me was that she has been seated next to a girl who is,in her words, naughty.

My dd has felt intimidated by this girl before as she doesn't listen to the teachers, even after getting warnings or head teacher visit.
She is very disruptive and talks much older than her age.

I have no idea why they would sit these two children together. I'm worried my dd will fall behind in her work now and will be too shy to tell the teacher why. Possibly ending in her getting told off too.

Should I talk to the teacher about this? I know it's only been a day but I'd rather sort it before it's a problem.
Dp thinks I should wait a while and see how things go. He's hoping dd will be able to sort it out herself.

Glad you are going to say something. No child should be worried about who they sit next to and they definitely shouldn't be used as part of the teachers classroom management
Long term, the more people that raise an objection may help the disruptive child get the additional help they need to settle and learn

I was the shy quiet child who was always sat next to the school bullies who used to bully me and made me so uncomfortable, school would do nothing and it got worse, happened for years, never made friends cause I was always sat with people who were the opposite of me, police had to take me to school cause I refused to go. I fully believe and blame the school for the fact I didn’t reach my full potential and had a horrific time at school which definitely stayed with me, ask your DD to be moved and don’t take no for an answer would be my suggestion, wish my mum advocated for me.

A side issue but yes to Weatherwax on the classroom response to quiet kids.
I have a more introverted child who would not show the required outgoing behaviours, (classes were jumbled every year with composite classes so there was a new bunch of classmates every year to settle with as well as the new teacher.) This was flagged early in every year. Then at the end of the year the teacher would say "wow they've really come on, haven't we done well!" But they hadn't in my view, each new beginning was a regression really due to the environment.

My child is quietly confident in a lot of areas but they are never going to enter a room and take centre stage in the first instance or fight for the limelight. This is not a character flaw.

@lollipoprainbow good luck today with school, @ChateauMargaux's post on page 1 is fantastic I think for getting your point across.

I hope that the school was helpful. It sounds like your dd is having a stressful start to the school year

Did you get any joy OP?

I managed to speak with the teacher. She said she will keep an eye on things and possibly have a reshuffle next week.

Dd didn't mention anything when she came home yesterday so i am thinking nothing bad happened.

Fingers crossed it goes OK for your dd now.

This also happened to dd1. Both in primary and secondary. But a fair bit of stuff like man spreading so she had no desk space. Shouting across her to the kid next to her. Throwing or taking of her stuff. Deliberately stopping her from seeing the board etc. At one point she git sandwiched between 2 of them

Whatever the plan is , for when the kids have burnt through all the tables partners who will absorb the issues to their own detriment whilst being to shy or nervous to speak to the teacher, they should just do that first.

Good luck op i have taught both my kids that they don't have to like everyone or be their friend. And to just get on with what they need to do. So I won't intervene when they just need to sit down and stop whinging.

I have however intervened when there have been actual physical issues. It's not just the well behaved kids they use. It's the well behaved quiet ones who will literally be a lunch bag and say nothing. They know it's going on but as they chose a quiet chikd ho would rather put up witg it than disappoint the teacher by saying something,they can pretend they had no idea.