Some Superb Loud Parenting happening on my bus right now

[FionasFanjoFondu]

A father - can you believe it - an actual man, has just wheeled a buggy containing a small person onto an real, live Bus.

I know....

I'm not sure if that's very happened before but at least everyone on this bus is in NO DOUBT that this is an exceptional and extraordinary father and a genius child because we are very luckily, able to share in the running commentary.

He has loudly proclaimed to all of us that Leo LOVES busses and has been on them several times.we have been treated to the dames of all the bus stops "now you say it Leo"... abs we also know that Leo is finding it all so exciting and already knows his numbers up to five! I mean..!

Leo would apparently love a carrot stick right now, but so elite are this mans parenting skills, that he has told leo the whole bus that there will "no eating on the wibbly wobbly bus because he could choke".

Later. Leo is having egg and avocado for tea before picking which pyjamas he wants to wear.

He has also just awarded Leo Olympic gold for pressing the bell and explained that "he'd drive it if we let him".

I don't know about that last claim. I think he would struggle to reach the clutch.

But anyway. Just thought people should know that a child rode a bus today neither his dad. I am trying it to feel inadequate.

I was loud Mum on the bus with my toddler, and pointing out everything in an upbeat sing song voice, until the bus went past the soft play place, which toddler recognised and started screaming 'BALLS! BALLS! BALLS! BALLS as we crawled past in slow traffic for about quarter of a mile and then weeping inconsolably when we didn't stop. I didn't ever take dd2 on a bus: let school trips be 'the experience' rather than putting either of us through the angst!

[quote CaptainMyCaptain]@fantastaballs Spot on! And I also taught in Early Years working on language skills and teaching reading. The child who bellows in the classroom all day long because they haven't learnt to adapt to the situation is a pain in the bum. It sounds like the Dad on the bus was talking AT his child not encouraging him to talk.[/quote]
Contigent talk- a valuable aspect of language development

Not just talking AT your child.

@Tooembarrassingtomention

The best way to develop language skills as a parent is to talk along side your child

Why do you think this is worthy of derision?

Weak communication skills are a barrier to learning

Agree with you 100%. But I've yet to see any research that suggests that talking to your child AND the whole bus/train/supermarket is more beneficial that a private conversation. Happy to be proved wrong.

Rather my husband be like that for the three brief years my babies were young than doing nothing like so many moan about on here!

Horrible post, particularly how you keep highlighting he's a man for no apparent reason than to mock him for parenting.

Rather my husband be like that for the three brief years my babies were young than doing nothing like so many moan about on here

I'd rather my husband didn't act like a twat in public but each to their own.

I enjoyed your post, thank you and took it in the spirit intended, humerous.
(Yes, I am fully aware of the importance of speech)

I’ve never spoken a single word to any of my children and yet they still won’t STFU.

Send help.

We had a chuckle at a dad at the picnic area of the park yesterday loudly tellling his (very young) son that only silly people are scared of wasps, look at all the silly people swatting them, don't they know you just say 'away' to them in a manly tone and they just buzz off.

Yes, was funny when he got stung.

There was also some guy trying to get his child to play with the diggers in the sandpit, he seemed quite perturbed that the little cherub couldn't actually play with anything what with being a newborn and not being able to hold its own head up and all.

Hate performance parents and there is a big, big difference between normal 'talking to your child' parenting and performance parenting which is done very loudly so all of the lesser parents can benefit from their wisdom.

Parents can’t win. Give your child a screen and you’re destroying their brain/creating an addict, if they cry/run around you’re a terrible parent for failing to control them, and if you dare to cave a basic conversation with them you’re ‘performance parenting’. What is the acceptable option?

“Leo’s Dad, when we travel on a bus, we remember to use our indoor voice!”

@Finknottlesnewt

Tooembarrassingtomention. Hmmm along with the complete ball ache of performance parenting comes the lack of humour attached to the professionally offended parenting /child development experts.....

😂

I'd be classed a performance parent of seen or by mumsnetters with my toddler. Truth is, he loves numbers and colours and always wants to count/talk about them. I love to talk to him, I enjoy it. So you'll hear me say things like 'yes that is a car. Shall we find a blue one? Oh well done yes that is a blue car. How many cars are there shall we count...' and so on.

I enjoy it. A lot. Is that bad?

@bookworm14

Parents can’t win. Give your child a screen and you’re destroying their brain/creating an addict, if they cry/run around you’re a terrible parent for failing to control them, and if you dare to cave a basic conversation with them you’re ‘performance parenting’. What is the acceptable option?

The middle ground

@namesnamesnamesnames

I'd be classed a performance parent of seen or by mumsnetters with my toddler. Truth is, he loves numbers and colours and always wants to count/talk about them. I love to talk to him, I enjoy it. So you'll hear me say things like 'yes that is a car. Shall we find a blue one? Oh well done yes that is a blue car. How many cars are there shall we count...' and so on.

I enjoy it. A lot. Is that bad?

No, that's lovely and we all do that. We just don't SHOUT it and do the swivel-headed look at me stuff that the OP is so referring to.

'David's really bright'

Is he? He seems like an entitled bully to me who can't even make eye contact and say hello

@Garriet

“Leo’s Dad, when we travel on a bus, we remember to use our indoor voice!”

Exactly.

There's more to raising a child than language development alone, there's also teaching basic manners and the two things really aren't binary!

"Milo, Milo, Shall we go to the Charcuterie for some Paaaarmer Ham? Shall we? When we get there shall we count out the money? Shall we practice your number bonds to ten?"

If this is you then bravo and well done for being yourself, but understand this:

No.Body.Else.Needs.To.Hear.You.Doing.This.

Some children have difficulty with speech snd language due to an underlying disorder. It doesn't matter how much you talk to them. They will still be more challenged than others. I had one child in speech therapy before phones and ipads. I hated all the comments about how you should keep talking to them and language would miraculously appear. We did and it didn't- except in its own time.

Sorry, I know this is not what the thread is about and know exactly what you mean by this type of parenting, though

"Holy fuck, you mean my deaf-since-birth uncle has just been pretending to read all these years!? That bastard."

DH is a little hearing impaired and does everything including parenting at a loud volume.
Some people are just loud, dad in this case doesn't seem to be doing anything terrible.

Yes you need to talk to your child not the bus the child gets zero input from a performance 🙄

Fwiw I talk to my child day and night he is still speech delayed we have had a range of excuses from "he is one of the younger children" (eldest in the class) his mother is single, unemployed? Umm no, ahh so "she works"how sad for her child only child? No older siblings ahhh then they are speaking "for him" are they "delayed" too? Actually no but feel free to judge

I love taking my three year old niece out and about, but mean spirited threads like this make me feel totally self conscious that people will think I’m a twattish performing parent.

However, my niece thinks I’m the best fun ever because I bounce around the park with her, enthusiastically chatting about everything we can see like a deranged CBeebies presenter.

I don’t have my own kids because I couldn’t be arsed committing to such high levels of enthusiasm 24/7.

The funniest example I've heard in all my years of parenting/childcare was a Dad watching a swimming lesson, en famille, with the mum and younger sibling of a little girl who was having her lesson. Dad had very clearly never watched a swimming lesson before. Nor apparently taken his daughter swimming. After about 15 minutes of running commentary in quite generic terms.. such as "oh, isn't Jacosta such a great swimmer now" and "just look at that, it will be Olympics next" etc ... He made a very specific comment - "look at that dive! Isn't Jacosta' front crawl amazingly fast, look at her go..."

Cue the mother looking at the lessons in progress in the pool in confusion. "That's not Jacosta! She's at the other side of the pool".

Poor man couldn't recognise his daughter in a unfamiliar surrounding and has been watching the wrong child in the wrong class all along.

I do love a bit of performance parenting from time to time to lighten the day with some humour.

@Alpenguin

I think I’d probably have enjoyed the dads pleasure at his child’s wonderment and learning, just as I would if it was a mum. All this bullshit about performance parenting as if they give a shiny shit about you sitting on your phone moaning on mumsnet about how perfect these two are. Remove the chips from shoulders and let this dad enjoy teaching his kid about the world, he’s so wrapped up in his kid he doesn’t even know you exist. Allow him his pride in seeing his child accomplish little things we take for granted. Stop being such miserable people ffs.

Yup. I would have enjoyed listening.