Would you judge a fellow mum using an electric wheelchair?

[WhenShallIShare]

So I use a Powerchair / electric wheelchair for anything more than a couple of mins walking as I have several things wrong with me meaning I get fatigued easily and am prone to fainting.

Anyway, my daughter has her first session at school coming up in which parents are invited to stay for the first 2hrs to get to know teacher, keyworker, lay of the land etc

I’m having a bit of a panic because I’d been planning on us walking (daughter walking, me wheeling on my chair) to school (it’s half a mile but that’s too far for me to walk) but now I’m panicking because I fear I’ll be judged for being disabled. And obviously I’m v v aware of first impressions and all that! The only other option is us driving, there’s a small car park and walking up to the school from there (I’d be able to manage that but not sure how much standing around I’d be able to do).

Basically what I’m asking is, would you judge a fellow mum at the first day of school using an electric wheelchair / Powerchair??

Don’t be silly, no of course not. If you turned up to school off your face, yes. Disabled, no. Why would I?

Not in the slightest. Like a lot of Mums I will just be joining you in anxiously hoping my child enjoys School more than I did.

Of course not - I wouldn’t judge you for a second. It’s sad you feel conscious of it and I think you should try to build your confidence especially to show your daughter. And im sure you will connect easily with the other parents as everyone will be feeling in the same boat which is really nice. I hope she has a lovely first day!

Judge? No. Never.
But with my knowledge of Reception classrooms, you might struggle to maneuvere it around as there won't be much space. Or indeed, being able to get it into the classroom if its an older building.

I highly doubt anyone will judge you but if they do screw them. I find most parents are quite nice despite the odd clique, and the schools are in general quite good about being inclusive.

There was a mum I used to see regularly on the bus who used a powered chair to accompany her 3 DC to primary school (two walking, one riding on the back). My impression of her was that she was awesome (as I had more trouble keeping mine in line than she had with hers). So my judgement would be a positive one.

Also, one of DS's friends uses a chair because he tires far too easily because of his condition. So I know that people can hop in and out depending on (variable) pain/tiredness.

Not at all. Just do what you need to ensure your daughter has a smashing first day at school. Definitely don't jeopardise the stay-and-play by overdoing it on the way there, that wont help your daughter at all.
Also, you'll be at this school for up to 7 years, so presumably school parents are going to see you using your chair plenty? Why not tomorrow?
None of the parents I know would judge you at all. Good luck!

Judge you? No.

I’d be impressed.

I saw a man riding a mobility scooter with a young child outside my window at 6.30am this morning honestly my first thought was ‘gosh what time did he get up to get himself and the child washed and out the house at this hour? I can barely open my eyes…. They look like they are enjoying each other’s company too….’

I’ve never heard of anyone in normal society judging someone for using a wheelchair, OP.

Are you perhaps mixing with some not very nice people? How could this ever be an issue?

I probably would call the school first though, not to ask permission or anything like that, but just to give them a heads up accessibility-wise, as they might want to alter the classroom layout to get the best possible access for you. Or if you plan to walk around the classroom when you get there, as you'll hopefully not be too fatigued, they will need to tell you where to store the chair so that it's not obstructing a fire exit or anything like that.

Many parents/grandparents and some teachers use wheelchairs and mobility scooters. My DD’s first HT used a wheelchair. Please don’t worry .

No. I wouldn't judge. Only a dickhead would. And if it's any reassurance, my one who just started school doesn't seem to judge either, there's a dad in a wheelchair who picks up kids there and her only comment was "I wonder do they get to sit on his knee and go really fast"

I doubt anyone would give it a second thought. They have no idea of the level of your disability - they will just see another new mum arriving with her child.

No not at all would just see you as another mum dropping her kids to school

Aw these comments are so lovely thank you so much. I think I feel massively judged because I can simply get out of my chair and walk around a bit then sit back down again and I guess I’m always in fear of someone calling the DWP on me!
But you’ve reassured me that yes it’s absolutely fine for me to use my chair to get to the school tomorrow. My plan will be mostly to park it outside the doors (her new class is like it’s own separate building within EYFS and I’ve been reassured it’s all wheelchair accessible) and walk in and then hopefully be able to sit on a regular chair or the floor or something lol.

Oh and my daughter absolutely loves my chair lol, she regularly goes for a ride on my lap when she gets tired.

My plan will be mostly to park it outside the doors (her new class is like it’s own separate building within EYFS and I’ve been reassured it’s all wheelchair accessible) and walk in and then hopefully be able to sit on a regular chair or the floor or something

That sounds like a great plan, and I hope it goes really well!

If anything you forcing yourself walk further than you are capable will only confuse them all the more when next see you on chair. Some people think you can either 100% walk everywhere or you can’t do single step. But like a toddler and a pushchair makes sense for distance and when tried or in a hurry. Good luck

Oh OP I get your DWP comment completely. I'm a part time wheelchair user, often take it with me so I'm guaranteed a seat! Anyone who judges you is clearly an arse and not worth bothering with!

No would never judge!

Absolutely do whatever you need to!

No, never! There are parent wheelchair users in our school. One sometimes walks or uses a stick. I just assumed that some days she has more difficulty but thought no more of it.

Another parent can walk but has a physical disability and parks in the school car park by arrangement.

Unless you run over my for I wouldn’t have the slightest interest!

What’s to judge? You may be permanently disabled, temporarily disabled, were injured when falling over a wall after a massive drugs binge or hurt saving the life of a kitten! I simply wouldn’t know why you use a wheelchair and it’s none of my business to hold you in any kind of judgement!

Run over my foot

@Aroundtheworldin80moves

Judge? No. Never. But with my knowledge of Reception classrooms, you might struggle to maneuvere it around as there won't be much space. Or indeed, being able to get it into the classroom if its an older building.

I was going to say this. My daughter was temporarily disabled and using a wheelchair when one of her children started reception. It was a very tight squeeze getting through.

Nobody would judge you, though.

No absolutely not. I would avoid anyone that did judge someone because they used a wheelchair too. There is quite a few parents and kids who use wheelchair's in my kids school including my son's friends parent.