People telling you you look pale/tired-why?!!

[Bigpjbottoms282]

Specifically my elderly neighbour and my MIL. Every single time I see them I'm greater with 'oh you look pale/tired'. Yes I do cause I'm fucking knackering running around after everyone including you 2!! What do they want me to reply?! I usually just say 'do I?' and quickly change the subject. It makes me feel shit about myself though, I don't know why they do it! I find it really rude!

*greated

I hate it too, but I think people are trying to be sympathetic about how much you’re doing. They’re probably expecting you to say ‘yeah been busy today!’ Or ‘ I didn’t get much sleep last night’ and then they would give you sympathy.

I used to get it constantly from certain people at work. Don't actually think I did look tired. In the end I said 'this is just how I look. I can't do anything about it'. They haven't said it since.

This is why I wear foundation and blusher every single day.

They're concerned .

It's my biggest pet peeve. I'm naturally super pale, which basically translucent skin and every single person I meet comments on how I look. It got to a point a couple years back where I just wouldn't leave the house within fake tan on.

I appreciate it when it's said when I really am tired.

There is a woman, in her 60s used to say this to me every day in work.."you look awful, you never have color on your cheeks, do you go out walking".
I was polite for a couple of moths then told her I had AIDs. That shut her up.

So very rude of her.

Very rude. It does my head in as I always look awful if I am tired or ill (unlike DH who looks the same regardless) and don't need reminding!

I get it all the time. I am pale and look like shit a lot of the time. My usual reply is ' this is just my face'.

My usual reply is ' this is just my face'.

I don't find it rude. To me it shows they are concerned about you - offering sympathy.

I don't need sympathy for my face!!!

It's possibly well meaning, but it's not a great thing to say to anyone.

I've had people tell me I look unwell/tired/stressed whatever when I've been feeling perfectly well and happy!

Next time I'm going to try the 'This is actually just my normal face' line!

You could just say 'I am a bit tired, actually'.

I think it’s really rude. One of my dh’s aunt told me I looked really tired and run down at our wedding reception. Just after the photos. Why would you think that’s ok? You should tell a bride she looks beautiful or radiant or compliment her outfit if she looks shit! I said “ oh, right, thanks for that.” Dh told me off for being rude.

My MIL does this. I hate it. It's basically saying you look awful. If I am tired, the last thing I need is someone telling me I look like shit too.

That said, my mum had a bad arm and mil told her "it's because you are so old" so I guess at least her lack oF tact is not personal against me

I'm going to adopt 'this is my face' I can't believe that the person who does it most to me is also a menopausal woman in her 50s, where is the tact of the sisterhood?

Ha yes my dm does this to me all the time too.
I got a break from it for a while when she lost her vision partially but now she's had both eyes corrected it's back again!
Also every time I yawn I get it too.
Drives me up the wall.
Loving the replies on here!

People are fond of saying this to me, so l reply "You and me both", see how like it.

See how they like it.

I get it all the time and I hate it! I don’t wear make up to work because I sweat it off and spend more time fixing where it has run than doing my job.

I think my new go to will be “oh I was just about to say the same to you!”

I get that too - cheek fillers and a touch of bronzer. I actually feel less tired now.

I get this too (and yes, often from my mum. ) I also use 'yes. This is just my face.'

I'm not sure if I find that more annoying, or 'you're very quiet'. I have been known to reply to that with 'well, someone has to be.'

You must think I'm rude because I tell people they look tired if they do. It's how I'd like to be treated so I treat others that way.
Every time I've said it, people seem to have appreciated it, or so I thought.