As I get older I like my own company more and doing things with other people less!

[Chloeblue]

I'm mid 40s and until now I felt like I had to have lots of friends, should enjoy doing things in big groups, should enjoy parties, should be more outgoing, when in actual fact I'm an introvert and love my own company, have always, but felt I should push myself. For a long time I walked and hiked in a big group, whereas now I know I enjoy nothing more than a peaceful walk by myself, the same with socialising, I can't be bothered anymore with big parties, get-togethers. I'm so happy I've finally seen the light and can just be me! I think the ending of my five year relationship six months ago has reinforced this. I'd love to hear from others who feel the same.

Thank you for this post. I have found my people. I wouldn't have even said that I was an introvert, but lockdown made me realise that I don't need to be here there and everywhere with whoever. I do enjoy my own company and I find now that if I have spend a lot of time socially on a Saturday. I need to spend the Sunday at home. I was never like this before. It's taking a little while for me to get my head around but reading this post makes me realise that it's not just me.

I'm 33 and feel exactly the same, in my 20s I felt like I had to have a big group of friends and always be making plans to go out and see people, always wanting to be liked or approved. Now I've realised how draining that can be and how much happier I am in my own company.
It's peaceful, I don't have to answer to anyone, and I feel more empowered to be able to say 'no' to people.
We spend so much of our time organising our lives around others that we forget our own needs and wants, that there is something really liberating at being comfortable and happy without anyone else around.

I realised last month I spend too much time pleasing other people and not enough time making myself happy.

What makes me happy... being alone! I went to Kew Gardens by myself and it was the best day ever

I am married so I do talk to DH at bedtime for a little while before falling asleep.

We could have our own large gathering.

Funny this thread has come up because I was just thinking the exact same a few hours ago. The more time I spend with other people the more I realise I prefer just spending time with my own family. I'm 39. Lockdown was bliss for me. I've always been an introvert but I've always forced myself go to parties and invites. The older I get the less I care about others opinions of me.

I also realise how these people don't actually know me....at all.

@aerosocks

Join the club!!!

No, wait....

Brilliant

I’m only really genuinely pleased to see my cats now. My family are annoying. Just really cba with it all now.

@aerosocks

Join the club!!!

No, wait....

Brilliant!

Great book by Susan Cain: ‘Quiet: the power of introverts in a world that can’t stop talking.’

@DancesWithTortoises, that would be good, each of us could sit and read our book in total silence. Wonderful😀

@RickOShay ha ha just seen your reply...snap!

Same here , mid 50’s and love my own company. I faff about in my garden, read , sew and do bits of diy. I don’t mind an hour or so having a meal or coffee with a friend but always look forward to coming home.

Late 40s, I love time with friends still but I can’t imagine having other people living in my flat. I mean, you close the door at the end of the day and they’re still there….

I'm Mid forties now but I've always been this way,always only had small group of friends and never socialised a great dealt We're all getting to the point now where a meet up or a birthday celebration is a quiet meal out,where it used to be all day sessions at biggest cities close by.

I've been like this for a few years now, Im late 30s.Lock down really suited me! I did go out for a "girls night" last month for the first time in 4 years, when I got home I was exhausted. Its all the endless chit chat, talking about nothing remotely important. I'd much rather read a book, potter about in the garden, cook. It will definitely be at least another few years before I put myself through that again

Me. I'm mid 50s and could happily never socialise with anyone ever again.

Professionally my job involves me being extremely chatty and friendly and mixing with a lot of people. Colleagues tell me But you're so confident and outgoing! You're not shy at all. You can't be an introvert. It's nothing to do with being shy. I'm not shy. I just prefer my own company and being at home to going out.

I find people exhausting and tiring and love spending time alone. Possibly I'll get slightly more sociable when I retire and don't have to spend my working days being with far more people than I want to be, all of whom are draining my battery!

Dear God yes. Lockdown made me realise it. I know this sounds pathetic but what to people say, particularly in relationship to work dos. I have avoided 3 in the last 6 weeks just by saying I have something else on. This gets more tricky when they are saying let's have night out what days work for you. I like them and everything but work is 20 miles away, I have to drive, cant drink and it's such an effort. I am toying with the idea of just saying oh I am not doing work dos anymore but it sounds so rude.

@FunTimes2020
Though thinking about it, I’d quite like this sort of club
We could just all moan

I'm late 40s, and live on my own (well, with compulsory rescue cats) in a villa in the ME. I bloody loved lockdown!
I do occasional social things and really enjoy them but need recovery time and solitude after. And I know my bloke is a keeper as I actually have phone conversations with him that last more than 2 mins

I’m not an introvert btw
I honestly prefer animals to most people especially en masse

These responses make me so happy and glad to realise there's nothing wrong with me! I do have friends and do like to meet up with them but in small groups. I do need a lot of time alone, I like nothing more than a good book or a long walk, I can't be doing with a lot of small talk anymore with people who are more acquaintances than friends.

41. Single parent. A handful of good friends who I really love, but we can go days without speaking.

I'll basically be a recluse when the DC go to uni. I can't wait.

I totally get this! I was always fairly social in my 20's and 30's. But I still found it draining. Now I'm in my 40's I literally couldn't care less. The thought of socialising is terrifying and utterly boring. I love my own company.

I'm with you OP!
In spirit...