I really don't need a male, 24-year-old sports coach mansplaining exercise and weight loss to perimenopausal women, thank you very much

[Annoyance]

That is all.

He's not anyone I work with, just someone I got into a conversation with and he started giving me unsolicited "advice".

Just fuck off.

if you need to lose weight then that suggests you're not an expert in what it takes to be a healthy weight.

Hence, he was not mansplaining. Mansplaining is when a non-expert man attempts to explain something to a woman who is an expert at that thing.

This was just unsolicited advice.

Technically if you are in perimenopause you can't be an expert on the menopause itself so..

@Ozanj

If the advice was to move more and eat less it was probably good advice.

Actually that would be the wrong advice to give to a woman who is peri menopausal as any weight issues are more likely to be hormonal issues rather than what she eats….

Actually that would be the wrong advice to give to a woman who is peri menopausal as any weight issues are more likely to be hormonal issues rather than what she eats….

I don't think that can be strictly true either
Plenty of women don't put on weight during peri.
I did, because I sat around troughing and doing fuck all.

I get it should have told him to fuck off the twat. You are allowed to feel insulted and irritated by a man child trying to tell you what is best for you. Who cares if he was being helpful n nice and possibly is an expert and not a man child at all.. So what if people don't think he was mansplaining if he pissed you off he was being a dick and if you feel like shouting that out and being unreasonably or reasonably grumpy cest LA vie carry on dear

@justfuckoffthelottayer

I get it should have told him to fuck off the twat. You are allowed to feel insulted and irritated by a man child trying to tell you what is best for you. Who cares if he was being helpful n nice and possibly is an expert and not a man child at all.. So what if people don't think he was mansplaining if he pissed you off he was being a dick and if you feel like shouting that out and being unreasonably or reasonably grumpy cest LA vie carry on dear

🤣

Without wanting to be accused of womansplaining you might find HRT helpful for the rage issuss

I'm astonished by the rudeness of a casually met 24 year old sports coach giving unsolicited advice to an adult woman.

I mean, come on! By the way, love, you need to cut out the carbs now you're past it and concentrate on aerobic exercise- but go easy now, you wouldn't want to break a bone! Women your age are prone to that, you know.

How very dare he?!

Solidarity, OP. Don't know what planet the PPs are on. They can't all be his mother, surely?

HRT that would be the thing my doctors said was completely unessesary because women are DESIGNED to go through the menopause.....why didn't I try these anti depressants those will soon perk me up

@Nietzschethehiker

I'm fully aware that I may get heat for this (I also do not care) but in fairness a quick read of the OP is likely to prompt other peri menopausal women (I am very much included here ) into contributing possibly in a larger scale in one place than other threads where you might get one or two of us , maybe ten at a push .

Hence the above thread which is a group of us descending into differing levels of snark , sarcasm , point scoring and rage.

The level of exhausted menopausal pettiness and rage is something I'm rather proud of here. If ever there was a clear example of why he shouldn't have tried it with the OP it is the evidence here that he took his life into his hands doing so.

Mansplainers are unbelievably annoying and it is guaranteed it is always the tone and behaviour connected that makes it mansplaining and not advice (and perfectly capable of being condescending whatever their age).

Yes more or less everyone here is being uneccesarily argumentative and difficult. The only reason I'm not is that I've just had a fried egg sandwich so have achieved 15 minute relief from being snappy, growly and fed up of the world. Don't worry I'll be back to it in a bit.

If ever there was a thread proving that any world conflict currently just needs to send in the menopausal and peri menopausal women of this country and we would shut it down in half an hour through sheer rage and fear inducing snapping and glaring it is this one. Then we would need a nap. And food ( maybe not as DP just cowered slightly when I though he had eaten the last of the rolls....food is a dangerous subject currently in my house ).

Just in case there are any outraged responses to anything I have said in this please be assured, from the bottom of my heart, again I don't care.

The best thing about being peri or even post menopausal is this. I really don’t give 2 flying fucks now, I don’t need to impress anyone and whilst I veer on the side of supportive and kind when needed, I will not put up with ‘smile and nod’ just to make some tosser feel validated.

Just in case there are any outraged responses to anything I have said in this please be assured, from the bottom of my heart, again I don't care

😂

Don't get into conversations with people about weight then?

It rarely comes up naturally. If someone marches over to you and says "Oi, fatty, drop the Mars bar!" then obviously that's very rude.

But usually when I get people complaining someone's 'talked about weight' with them, the one who brought it up was them. "Oh, I'm so fat, oo, I'm going to have a naughty treat, oo, I'm doing Slimming World what are you doing? Oo my food is a sin" and they go ON AND ON

and it does my head in a bit. I am sporty, I enter competitions in my sport, and I keep my fitness and nutrition stuff private, but then they come at you with "oo I bet you never eat naughty treats" or "oo I bet you've always been thin, tell me what you eat" and "I bet you're really super healthy eh" and I still don't talk about it because I really hate goading.

So. Honestly? If someone's come up to and from absolutely NOWHERE started banging on about weight, they are crazy rude and yes, you have my sympathies.

If you tend to be the one to bring up weighty matters? Less so. People who talk about it a lot, there's no harm in thinking they're digging for advice.

Tbf I take all my weight loss and fitness advice from this woman and she's also massively annoying (but seems to know what she's talking about) https://youtube.com/c/PahlaBowers

A "sports coach" could be the OP's 7 year old's amateur football coach.

The OP should have replied with more information but the pile on is ridiculous.

It is a fact that providing completely unsolicited advice is inappropriate.

Its not the same as a female GP advising her own male patients when they come to her surgery; its the same as her offering unsolicited advice to stop smoking, take up jogging, eat more vegetables and get 8 hours sleep a night to dads at the school gate without being asked for advice or knowing their medical history or what's going on in their lives to make big changes easy or difficult (bereavement, job loss, newborn at home, sick partner/ parent, marriage breakdown, or other stress) or indeed whether they're already doing those things.

I think you're being a bit unfair. I like hearing new information on exercise and nutrition. I'm 44 and things have moved on a LOT in recent times

**

@Nietzschethehiker You're amazing!

Why are people on this douchebag's side? ANYONE who offers unsolicited advice about your diet needs to get fucked.

@Ingridla

I think you're being a bit unfair. I like hearing new information on exercise and nutrition. I'm 44 and things have moved on a LOT in recent times

But things haven't really moved on. It's always been true that eating lots of fruit and vegetables is good for you, and that if you consume less than you burn you'll lose weight. There are lots of specific types of diet, but they all hinge on the calorie deficit principle. The only time that's not true is if you've got a specific syndrome like PCOS which requires a low carb or ketogenic diet. We've all known that for about a decade.

If male sports coaches and personal trainers knew ANYTHING about women, they wouldn't make us do star jumps or jumping Jacks as warm ups.

A room full of women. Ages range between 35ish to 70. At least a third have had children. I can run, lift heavy things and do burpees. But jumping up and down? Come on!

[quote Annoyance]@Nietzschethehiker You're amazing! [/quote]
So who was he? Are you going to give any more information? there's been lots of questions...

@Nietzschethehiker

I'm fully aware that I may get heat for this (I also do not care) but in fairness a quick read of the OP is likely to prompt other peri menopausal women (I am very much included here ) into contributing possibly in a larger scale in one place than other threads where you might get one or two of us , maybe ten at a push .

Hence the above thread which is a group of us descending into differing levels of snark , sarcasm , point scoring and rage.

The level of exhausted menopausal pettiness and rage is something I'm rather proud of here. If ever there was a clear example of why he shouldn't have tried it with the OP it is the evidence here that he took his life into his hands doing so.

Mansplainers are unbelievably annoying and it is guaranteed it is always the tone and behaviour connected that makes it mansplaining and not advice (and perfectly capable of being condescending whatever their age).

Yes more or less everyone here is being uneccesarily argumentative and difficult. The only reason I'm not is that I've just had a fried egg sandwich so have achieved 15 minute relief from being snappy, growly and fed up of the world. Don't worry I'll be back to it in a bit.

If ever there was a thread proving that any world conflict currently just needs to send in the menopausal and peri menopausal women of this country and we would shut it down in half an hour through sheer rage and fear inducing snapping and glaring it is this one. Then we would need a nap. And food ( maybe not as DP just cowered slightly when I though he had eaten the last of the rolls....food is a dangerous subject currently in my house ).

Just in case there are any outraged responses to anything I have said in this please be assured, from the bottom of my heart, again I don't care.

Ah music. Sweet, sweet music.

@Bryonyshcmyony

The worst symptom of perimenopause for me was often being too quick to take offence and often being utterly unreasonable. Just saying.

The worst symptom of perimenopause for me was being a smug sanctimonious arsehole. Just saying.

Ok so no information forthcoming from OP. What a waste of everyone's time.