Cover story needed for child leaving school

[ScruffySock]

DD, 13 is miserable and after attempts to sort it out we are finally taking her out of school. There may be a place coming up soon at an alternative school, or it may be up to a year. We will home school her in that time.

However, it seems like a good idea for her to tell her old classmates a reason for her to be leaving so she doesn’t cause additional rifts, as people live locally. Given that she isn’t going anywhere else straight away, the only thing I can think of is health? She has a long term auto-immune condition which could have got worse I suppose?

Any other ideas? Thank you in advance.

Don't lie about her health.

Just don't.

It is never a good idea to lie.

Just that she enjoyed home schooling over lockdown so that’s what she will be doing.

Prefers homeschooling. Do not lie about health

I changed school at that age and I simply said I didn't like it. I still saw children who went to the school and I just said it wasn't right for me. I didn't get any negative comments from this.
Is there a reason why you feel the need for a cover story?

She doesn't need to give a reason.
Just tell them she's leaving - see you around.

Yeah just say homeschool suits her better.

I wouldn't lie ..just be really vague and say things weren't working out

Do not lie - amongst other reasons if people find out it will make life much harder for her and it doesn't sound like she needs that.

Agree with everyone else - a lie can come unravelled and cause more upset.

Does she need to announce it? Presumably any friends she can be honest with (to an extent - she wanted a change), are others likely to ask?

I'm superstitious so I wouldn't lie about health.

All she needs to say is she prefers being home schooled.

DD(14) left school at Easter for a number of reasons, not least issues with other children in the village. I just suggested she told them she preferred online learning. We told the school the real reasons and they didn’t even respond - just forwarded to the local authority. She’s much happier now.

“My mum wants to home school me”. Near enough to the truth whilst absolving her from having to defend or explain the decision.

Feels unhappy/stressed in the school environment and is taking a break for a while.

'My parents want to stick with home school for a while longer' End of conversation.

'Home schooling suits us better at the moment, we are testing it out'

Why can’t she just be honest? Just say she prefers home schooling? Why is the default to lie?

Don't lie about her health! She will never get away from that if people find out.

Just be vague and say home school suits your family better just now.

@Bluntness100

Why can’t she just be honest? Just say she prefers home schooling? Why is the default to lie?

Because I don’t think the truth will be a very good idea. She needs to say something that isn’t “you’re a load of bitches who have been making my life a misery”.

@EduCated

Agree with everyone else - a lie can come unravelled and cause more upset.

Does she need to announce it? Presumably any friends she can be honest with (to an extent - she wanted a change), are others likely to ask?

I think if she doesn’t say something then rumours will go round and mess up any future local friendships. I don’t think her leaving with an air of mystery is a great plan somehow.

Say someone in the household is vulnerable to covid

But frankly if she isn’t friends with them, why does it matter if they know she thinks they’re bitchy? She might see them in passing but they’re never going to be in close contact again. Who cares?

She doesn’t need to say anything, she can just slip away. If someone who is bulling her asks then they’d be getting ignored. If a friend asks then she can tell the truth as they are friends.

Thanks everyone, I hadn’t thought of the homeschooling line really. It’s still a lie though and if she gets a place at another school quickly then it comes unravelled. But I guess people can change their minds.

I suppose “I’m going to try home schooling for a bit” is truthful actually.

Honestly I think she’s best just saying as little as possible.

They’re not going to be any less bitchy if they find out or think she’s exaggerating her health condition and becomes known as the girl who pretended to be ill.

Practice some responses along the lines of ‘it’s not right for me’, ‘mum wants me to move for GCSEs’, ‘I wanted a change’.

She doesn’t need to announce it, wait for people to ask and it’s up to her if she answers them.