What parenting things do other people do that you absolutely refuse to do?

[FrangipaniDeLaSqueegeeMop]

I never bake my kids' birthday cakes. I can buy a very good supermarket one or pay someone to produce something that looks better than what I can do and has cost me less.

I won't do role playing with them. There are no scarier words than "mummy will you play with me - you be the dog and I'll be the owner". I apparently do it ALL WRONG anyway, I usually say something like "instead, why don't we do some painting" or I even say I'm busy. And I thank God every day the days of playing tea parties are over. Me perched on a very uncomfortable toadstool seat pretending to sip tea from a singing Fisher Price teacup for 2 hours and doing it wrong anyway 😂

Oh and another one. Absolutely refuse to ever use our DDs as a source of income.

[quote ZingDramaQueenOfSheeba]@OnTheBrink1

I didn't say "I won't ".
not sure why you felt to
a, misinterprete what I said and
b, add a tearful emoji
it's offensive & there's no need for you to be sad over things you have no idea about[/quote]
The title of the OP is things you absolutely refuse to do so yes, I took it that you refuse to read a bedtime story. Not apologising for finding that terribly sad.

@maras2

Negotiate with or pander to anyone under 9.

So how are your children learning to negotiate successfully and appropriately? It’s an important skill! Also, what do you mean by ‘pander to’? It sounds like something someone would say in the 1800s, along with ‘children should be seen and not heard’. Also, why is 9 the magic number?? Do children suddenly become people worth engaging with at the age of 9, whereas before you could happily dismiss their needs by loftily stating ‘oh I’m not pandering to the needs of my 8 year old. Give them a year and then I’ll start treating them as if they have a will of their own’

Bloody loads definitely never let my child sleep in my bed I always shake my head at people still struggling to get their child in own bed at 6/7/8 or even older .
I’ve never baked a birthday cake .
Also giving kids ridiculous amounts of sweets too annoys me mine get treats but never would they gorge themselves. A friend recently let her child have 2 ice creams straight after , bloody big ones too I’d struggle with one but a 6 year old just because they don’t want to say no to a child . Of course she couldn’t finish it .
In fact any parent that refuses to say no to a child and lets them continually have stuff so it’s not a treat it’s just ordinary is spoilt .
Hate any sort of slime / glitter / plasticine they can do that at school.

@PandasCatsWolves

This has turned into stealthy boast/ passive aggressive competition

I'm not seeing this at all

• Elf on the shelf - it wasn't really a thing when mine were little thank God.

• cooking separate meals for the children - we've always all eaten together.

• soft play. Both of mine thought you could only go to soft play for birthday parties.

It’s not turned into stealth brag,An indignant minority criticising others and being conspicuously that someone isn’t the same as them. Completely missing the point of the thread. It’s essentially people describing how they deviate from a norm or expected behaviour. I’ve not read anything on thread that’s made me think will no one think of the child or worry

@EspressoDoubleShot

It’s not turned into stealth brag,An indignant minority criticising others and being conspicuously that someone isn’t the same as them. Completely missing the point of the thread. It’s essentially people describing how they deviate from a norm or expected behaviour. I’ve not read anything on thread that’s made me think will no one think of the child or worry

Yes most are just stating the facts. A few twats are been beautifully judgmental as a means to justify why they deviate from what they perceive is the norm

@EspressoDoubleShot

EuroDisney, I’ve explained it is a shallow overpriced and dull

I went to EuroDisney without kids, I totally love it

And that’s fine, for you. I will never take the kids. They asked we declined. I have no desire to spend my AL in themed hellhole with enforced joviality and reference to Disney characters whom embody fake wholesome values that I dont aspire to

I’ve never bought a school photo. I think the lighting/quality is crap. Or a class photo.

Never had a professional photo shoot. (Why would you?)

Don’t cover the walls with family photos. I know what they look like!

@peaceanddove I’m intrigued, did you always put your babies down awake in their cots? What would happen if you did? Mine would just scream instantly when put in their cots awake, and/or just dick about for ages. And did you not experience any sleep regressions after 6 months? Both mine were sleeping quite well by about 2 months but eldest had horrendous regressions at 4 months, 8 months, 12 months. Got her sleeping through again at about 20 months which lasted until her second birthday and then she started waking up at all hours which has since continued for 6 months 😭

• do crafts - I’m just not that good at it, but Grandma is so DD still gets plenty of opportunity to do it
• have a playroom - we live in a flat but even if I had a house I wouldn’t want one, children want to play where you are, and benefit from a smaller number of toys
• no big toys eg ride-ons, garden toys (space limitations)
• we don’t go shopping as a leisure activity. If she needs something I’ll get it, but I’m not taking her around the shops to be pestered.

Generally we do lots of play, reading and child-centred activity, but try to keep it to things which don’t involve consumerism, like the beach, playing outside, the library.

Oh also I’m agreeing with everyone about the photo shoots. I hate them, think they are so cringe and generally overpriced for what look like cheap catalogue photos.

Given a choice I would never have baked a birthday cake but having a child with multiple food allergies kind of forced me into it. Cake bought cakes are awesome lol.

No baby classes or toddler groups.

No sleepovers. Ever.

No fizzy drinks.

No birthday parties.

I do participate in role play type games but I hate them with a passion.

Before I actually had kids this list was much longer - I wasn't going to give my precious children sweets, ipads, plastic toys etc and no way was I going to give in to tantrums or live my life around a baby blah blah. I was a bit of an arse.

*shop bought cakes

[quote Crabsy]@peaceanddove I’m intrigued, did you always put your babies down awake in their cots? What would happen if you did? Mine would just scream instantly when put in their cots awake, and/or just dick about for ages. And did you not experience any sleep regressions after 6 months? Both mine were sleeping quite well by about 2 months but eldest had horrendous regressions at 4 months, 8 months, 12 months. Got her sleeping through again at about 20 months which lasted until her second birthday and then she started waking up at all hours which has since continued for 6 months 😭[/quote]
It's a bit hazy now, as we're talking over 16 years ago. But basically they were put down in their cots when we could tell they were sleepy. Once we closed their bedroom doors there was a bit of sleepy sounding grumbling, but that was about it.

When DD1 was about 8 months she started playing up as we put her down, even though she was clearly sleepy. So we sleep trained her. I think it only took a few days? Just going back in every few minutes to quickly reassure, but no eye contact, didn't get her out of the cot, didn't SW tch on any lights etc.

Play dates. Appreciate this probably makes me a witch but I really cba with other people’s kids, my own are enough…

Never given mine fizzy drinks either and they’ve also never had a sleepover or a birthday party. We go out for the day as a family on their birthday and I still spend a lot of money but don’t have the hassle of other people’s children for the day.

[quote Crabsy]@peaceanddove I’m intrigued, did you always put your babies down awake in their cots? What would happen if you did? Mine would just scream instantly when put in their cots awake, and/or just dick about for ages. And did you not experience any sleep regressions after 6 months? Both mine were sleeping quite well by about 2 months but eldest had horrendous regressions at 4 months, 8 months, 12 months. Got her sleeping through again at about 20 months which lasted until her second birthday and then she started waking up at all hours which has since continued for 6 months 😭[/quote]
My first was a nightmare basically refused the cot and would scream when put in it. So co sleeping happened. I always thought how do people put their kids down and they just fall asleep. Then had my 2nd. He moved his cot, and I really did nothing other than put him in the cot, he was very happy and would nod off! Miracle I thought! Just shows they're all different regardless of what we do.

Lol. Moved should read loved.

@EspressoDoubleShot

It’s no big deal to formula feed,it’s safe and adequate nutrition

@EspressoDoubleShot again how is this different to the comments you are trying to police?

What are you seeking?Are you trying to provoke a reaction. if that’s your observation fair enough.

No I'm just trying to highlight the fact you are hypocritical telling people to stop with a type of reply that you yourself did. And when the poster said she was merely wandering the question, you said she was defensive.

Utterly bizarre.

*answering not wandering