Just fucking say hello.

[SayingMyThing]

I'm currently working in a not terribly exciting position in a hotel, bit of breakfast waitressing followed by housekeeping.
It's only part time and only temporary ( not that my employers know that)
My immediate boss is an 18 year old trainee manager.
She tends not to acknowledge me when I turn up for work so I always say hello. On my last 3 shifts she wasn't about so I cracked on with setting up for breakfast, she then appeared and gave me an instruction without so much as a good morning. I've only been there two weeks.
It's driving me mad, I'm a grown woman (graduate) who under normal circumstances is treated with a bit more respect.
Is she rude or am I a bit precious?

It's pretty common practice to say hello. Not doing so on a repeated basis is very odd.

Maybe at 18 she's not very confident and socially aware (but as a trainee manager, she ought to be).

Just set an example. Keep saying hello, in a civilised fashion, and let her do as she wishes.

Oh God I couldn't do it. I'd leave and write to head office and tell them exactly why.

But I'm a bit reactionary.

The only thing you could do otherwise is to be really over the top in your greeting of her. It's highly possible she feels uncomfortable and scared in her position and worries about telling someone older than her what to do.

If she does it again...(instructs without greeting) say "Ok I'll do that now then...and good morning by the way!"

She should get it after a few tries.

She's very confident, has no trouble at all telling people what to do.

No, its the absolute basics of manners and seeing as this person wants to be in a management position, in hospitality I'd be making something of it in a nice way every time it happens.

Perhaps she doesn't know how to treat you. 18 is quite a young age to manage people

So she might just be rude...complain about her then. In a nice way. I mean...what's her boss like?

I'm also a bit reactionary, but maybe I'll just have to do as you suggest and lead by example, if I can.

I thought this was gonna be about people you were serving (who should also say hello) but your manager? Rude!!

Shes 18, shes a dick, she thinks she knows it all

Use the job for the money op and move on when you're ready

I think I’d tackle it gently. Most 18yos still have some corners to wear off, so perhaps she’s not very good socially. When you say hello and she gives an instruction, I might reply with “and hello to you SayingMyThing, and then repeat the instruction”, with a smile to show it’s lighthearted. The penny should drop.

Yes do that. Be cheery and say morning etc but you could also add in a few chatty comments to help her see the way.

Just basic things "Busy this morning isn't it" and so on. See if that helps her. I personally could not BEAR it.

Are you possibly giving off the "I'm too good for this job" vibe?

I would be having fun and games with that! I would be giving her a gushing over the top greeting every morning, aiming to out do myself each day

She’s probably just too young to know how to treat people she manages. Keep in saying hi to her. I might mention it to her too if opportunity presents itself as it’s constructive advice for her.

I lost a job with a manager like this because after she gave me instructions I said and good morning to you too I will get right on that 😂

Don't do what I did till your last day

@Bvop

I think I’d tackle it gently. Most 18yos still have some corners to wear off, so perhaps she’s not very good socially. When you say hello and she gives an instruction, I might reply with “and hello to you SayingMyThing, and then repeat the instruction”, with a smile to show it’s lighthearted. The penny should drop.

That might piss her off though...especially if she's already sensitive about being young and in management.

Better to just try to break the ice with some friendly comments.

Or say "I've decided to go in for management training too...I'll be telling you what to do soon!"

Joking of course.

I'd cut her a bit of slack, she's young, she may not have a good parenting example. I'd make sure I said hello, how are you at the start each shift and model by example

I certainly wouldn't give up a job because someone didn't say hello, surely that's bit OTT

She's rude

But you mentioning you're an undergraduate does make you sound precious, as it has nothing to do with anything.

A polite good morning to be given to everyone, not just those with further education.

It is both unbelievable and believable. Say hello or if 2 syllables are too taxing say Hi.

Management is all about the soft skills in my opinion, so she definitely needs to be told, but probably not by you, can you talk to her boss? What on earth is an 18 year old doing at that level anyway?

@Justmuddlingalong

Are you possibly giving off the "I'm too good for this job" vibe?

I don't think so, I muck in, arguably above and beyond the call of duty. Had my arm in marigolds and cling film trying to unblock a guest's toilet. I dress very smartly though?

@FortunesFave

Oh God I couldn't do it. I'd leave and write to head office and tell them exactly why.

But I'm a bit reactionary.

The only thing you could do otherwise is to be really over the top in your greeting of her. It's highly possible she feels uncomfortable and scared in her position and worries about telling someone older than her what to do.

If she does it again...(instructs without greeting) say "Ok I'll do that now then...and good morning by the way!"

She should get it after a few tries.

This!

Her age is no excuse. She's a manager (trainee) in hospitality and doesn't know the basics of how to greet someone? I'd be asking her if she'd left her manners at home today. But then I'm a mardy arse and too long in the tooth to put up with rudeness like this.

I like what Bvop said. She is still young, lacks social graces, her lack of greeting is not about you. So many teens are genuinely afraid of hassle if they say the wrong thing. Just cheerfully say hello every time, you may teach her to enjoy saying it back.