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Original poster

I wish I'd money

101 replies

ssd · 04/07/2021 09:37

Thats all

It would put my worries at rest

I know its not everything but its a lot when you don't have it

OP posts:
OffRampHilton · 04/07/2021 17:15

Just as an example.

My husband became seriously ill in 2017. I had no family near me for support. He spent several months in hospital, and was off of work for most of the year.

We have private health insurance so there was pretty much no wait for a diagnosis. He was in a private hospital that also did lots of amazing complementary treatments so, while he was undergoing medical treatment, he also took up yoga and a physical activity programme.

His work continued to pay him while he was sick, but we had income protection so wouldn’t have had to worry.

The hospital was in the same city as we lived, but I was visiting before and after work so it was inconvenient to drive to and from so I did it via taxi.

I was able to buy him any magazines, books, puzzles etc he wanted to help him pass the time.

We spent a lot of time on the phone, and didn’t have to be concerned about running up bills.

Thankfully, he had a great recovery. While having money wouldn’t have stopped him getting sick, it did make life while he was sick much easier.

doesparentingsuck · 04/07/2021 17:21

I do agree with your post and I have money - not being goady just being honest.

I also suffer from mental health, which obviously money does not fix but I agree with you it makes it easier. I can pay for counselling and do things not to completely take away my depression but help it - be it a meal out with DH etc to cheer me up.

So no, money doesn't make you 'happy' I think it would be very short sighted to think that.

But it can make things easier which in term can contribute to your happiness,

That said some of my happiest moments were as a student with £5 to my name so...who knows!!

Friendofdennis · 04/07/2021 17:53

Yes there is a low level constant stress with not having enough money And when other things go wrong such as health or emotional problems within the family I do not have the resources to deal with it. What I do have is my faith and I would be lost without it. Prayer /meditation makes me feel that I can express my anxieties.

HelloMissus · 04/07/2021 17:56

Yes. Money brings meaningful choice with it.

AnneElliott · 04/07/2021 19:53

I get you op - it's much more expensive being poor. If you have to pay car insurance monthly then they charge for that. You can't afford to buy in bulk for toilet roll etc.

I'm grateful every day that we are now comfortable and I don't have to check the bank account before going food shopping. I think people who say it doesn't matter have never had a hard time making ends meet. I do worry that DS might be like that. I love being able to give him stuff that I didn't have, but hopefully he won't take it for granted.

shivawn · 05/07/2021 10:28

I believe that I was just as happy when I was young and poor in my 20's as I am now having money in my 30's. Of course, having money is far more important as you get older. I wasn't worried about having things like health insurance or a mortgage in my 20's.

claralara42 · 05/07/2021 10:33

I hate when people say 'money doesn't make you happy'

Yes. I always think...well, you're just not any good at spending it! OF course money can make you happy, fgs!! And while it can't stop bad things happening to you, everything is less bad when you have money.

ElectricTreeLeaf · 05/07/2021 10:43

I have been at both ends of financial comfort, dirt poor growing up, the shame I felt still stings to this day. I was a very poor uni student then fell into a well paid office job after graduating. Met Dh who went straight into a graduate job.

He has worked his arse off to get to where he is, lots of additional hours learning new skills. We moved very far to a much cheaper area cashing in the equity in our previous home making life very comfortable but we only had a toddler then, no children in school.

Money doesn't make you happy but it does give you choices and lifts the mental weight of constantly thinking about what needs paying for, when you can replace X and hoping that the boiler sees you through another winter. I am incredibly lucky but I can completely appreciate that lack of money is completely shit.

My friend was due to remortgage her house and always just used her bank, I told her about London and Country being whole market etc and she saved £150pm in mortgage repayments, she was over the moon.

RosesAndHellebores · 05/07/2021 10:43

My mother always said "it's better to be poor and happy than rich and miserable, but if you are going to be miserable it's far better to be rich and miserable than poor and miserable".

Arsebucket · 05/07/2021 10:57

I hate the whole “want what you have” shit as well.

Funkily enough, I don’t want to be renting someone else else’s damp, shit house.

Money is fucking wonderful.

I was very well off once upon a time. I didn’t have the constant, pit of the stomach pain worrying that I do now. The fear for the future.

The only thing I kept from those days was the private health insurance as it saved my life once. I now have holes in most of my clothes because Incant afford more due to paying the premium, and I forgo things like takeaways to pay for it, but i’d never be without it. So that’s one worry off my mind.

pippapoo62 · 05/07/2021 10:59

Having more money then you can spend could make you unhappy ,but having enough money to pay bills and a few extras would of course make you happy. I have been in both and I am happy that I have now no debt but I am older now ( mid 50s) so have had a few years to change my way of living plus I don't have young children to support ,and children as we know can be very expensive

FifteenToes · 05/07/2021 11:16

Don't have links to hand but I think there's a pretty strong consensus among researchers into the subject that having enough money to live comfortably does indeed make you happier, but having enough to be rich doesn't really make much difference beyond that. There's an element of diminishing returns.

Being poor is just such a hassle. So many things are so much more complicated to get done, or can't be done at all and then life is more complicated because you have to work out how to work around them.

Perhaps when clueless rich people say "money doesn't make any difference", you should answer "OK, why don't you give me all yours then?" Smile

doesparentingsuck · 05/07/2021 12:06

Perhaps when clueless rich people say "money doesn't make any difference", you should answer "OK, why don't you give me all yours then?"*

😂😂

Eviebeans · 05/07/2021 12:51

I don't have loads of money, but enough that things are not a daily struggle in the way that I know they are for some people. It is a weight off your mind to have enough to meet your regular monthly outgoings and a bit extra for treats...

Eviebeans · 05/07/2021 12:51

There are definitely times though when I do wish I had more money

Maggiesfarm · 05/07/2021 12:54

ssd, I hear you. I (I hate saying 'we' all the time but I do mean me and husband and small children), were very hard up when young and it was worrying and depressing.

You will be better off later on ssd. I know that doesn't help at this moment but it does gradually happen naturally.

Original poster
ssd · 05/07/2021 16:15

Im mid 50s Confused

Anyway, another thing occurred to me today when i was having a clear out. We have no space, nowhere to keep stuff, its all crammed under the stairs. Money gives you a bigger space to live in, maybe a garage to keep stuff in etc. Our house is small

OP posts:
Maggiesfarm · 05/07/2021 16:46

I'm sorry ssd. We inherited some years which of course made a big difference. Not untold riches but certainly enough. That is what I was thinking of really because many do inherit. It isn't nice when someone you care for dies, even when they are old, but having some more money means less worry and more freedom.

In the immediate years before that we had become more stable financially.

I hope things improve for you before too long.

JovialNickname · 05/07/2021 16:56

I know what you mean, money brings freedom, and choices, and independence. There is no dignity in poverty. I have spent so much of my life worrying about bills, and homelessness, and having to do things I don't want to do for money. I'm sure my life wouldn't be perfect if I had no financial worries but 99% of my fear and stress would be gone.

Original poster
ssd · 05/07/2021 17:12

@Maggiesfarm, it ok i know what you mean. I'm finding at my age there's more of a divide when inheritance comes into play. Both of us have lost our parents but they lived in council houses so there wasn't any inheritances. Just how it is.

Life is fine. Just wish it could be easier.

OP posts:
Maggiesfarm · 05/07/2021 17:25

Good days and bad days ssd.
Life was never meant to be easy.
I hope you have a good day tomorrow.

Original poster
ssd · 05/07/2021 17:41

Thanks you too.

OP posts:
lollipoprainbow · 08/07/2021 07:19

I think I'm what's known as a JAM just about managing !! I'm overdrawn every single month. Would love more money Sad

honkytonkheroe · 08/07/2021 07:31

I totally get what FinallyFluid is saying. Health matters trump everything else because what good is anything if you don’t have your health? My dad used to say “if you have a problem money can solve, then you haven’t got a problem”. He was a very hard working man and thought it could dig himself out of anything by working harder. Me and my sister have discussed this previously and we tend to disagree as a bit short sighted but we can see where he was coming from.

Tal45 · 08/07/2021 08:28

I think it would be lovely if money wasn't important, but it makes a huge difference. I've been poor, renting a flat on benefits, working part time in a shop, not able to afford anything but the very basics, never wanting to put the heating on, eating cheap food and not being able to afford to go out or run a car.
Now I feel very lucky to own a house and be able to afford holidays but those days still stick with me, I still don't like putting the heating on, I upcycle everything, wear clothes and shoes till they literally fall apart. But for me it's just knowing that you can do things if you want or need to, go out for dinner, go on a holiday, replace the washing machine or car if they break. It gives you peace of mind and also things to look forward to.

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