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Original poster

Obsessive Women Cleaners

91 replies

Ladywinesalot · 26/06/2021 21:05

Ok so this is not about feminism (although it may turn out to be)

I like a clean house, and if I had my way my home would be a perfect show room house allll the time.

However I just can’t be asked for one and also have lots in my life, like working and social life.

So I ask who are these women who have perfect shoes room houses, and why do you?

Are you not busy in other areas if your lives? Do you have nothing else to do?

And no my DH does not clean up nor will he. Should I LTB? Probably but I won’t.

OP posts:
accentdusoleil · 26/06/2021 21:08

Each to their own, surely .

We all Prioritise different parts of our lives to different degrees.

Not sure what your point is

Original poster
Ladywinesalot · 26/06/2021 21:10

@accentdusoleil

Each to their own, surely .

We all Prioritise different parts of our lives to different degrees.

Not sure what your point is

That I feel like a failure because I’m not, and that the standard for women is to be a home maker before you’re successful in anything else.

I’m successful in lots but to have my home show house standard is just not there.

OP posts:
FlibbertyGiblets · 26/06/2021 21:10

It isn't a failing btw. Your insinuation that obsessive behaviours mean the person has nothing better to do is off the mark.

Waveafterwaveslowlydrifting · 26/06/2021 21:11

Cleaning is boring. There's more to life.

ImFree2doasiwant · 26/06/2021 21:11

I'd like my house to be cleaner and tidier. The upstairs is current pretty good. Downstairs, not so much. I could be sorting it out now but instead I'm eating jelly and ice cream and mumsnetting. By the time tge 4 abd 5 yr old are in bed, I'm DONE. A Also, single

Original poster
Ladywinesalot · 26/06/2021 21:13

@FlibbertyGiblets

It isn't a failing btw. Your insinuation that obsessive behaviours mean the person has nothing better to do is off the mark.
That’s partly my wonder. Do they have nothing else to do so then can have show room houses?

I always feel a failure because I don’t have a show room house.

Should I quit all other areas of life to fulfil an Inate part of my feminine intuition?

OP posts:
PartTimeLegend · 26/06/2021 21:13

...and that the standard for women is to be a home maker before you're successful in anything else

Says who? I must have missed that memo.

Original poster
Ladywinesalot · 26/06/2021 21:13

@Waveafterwaveslowlydrifting

Cleaning is boring. There's more to life.
Yes, that’s what I fell too.
OP posts:
JaquelineBean · 26/06/2021 21:14

Which people have show room houses? Are you regularly visiting them? Are other people visiting you?

TillyTopper · 26/06/2021 21:14

I love my house to be super clean and tidy - it gives me pleasure to just look at it! However, I don't do it all myself, I often pay someone to do it and have a regular cleaner as well. I work long hours in a demanding job so buy what help I need.

Original poster
Ladywinesalot · 26/06/2021 21:14

@PartTimeLegend

...and that the standard for women is to be a home maker before you're successful in anything else

Says who? I must have missed that memo.

Time, society, gender roles, nature/nurture.

It’s all there…

OP posts:
Original poster
Ladywinesalot · 26/06/2021 21:16

@TillyTopper

I love my house to be super clean and tidy - it gives me pleasure to just look at it! However, I don't do it all myself, I often pay someone to do it and have a regular cleaner as well. I work long hours in a demanding job so buy what help I need.
Yes think I need help to make this happen.

Still shows that there a need for clean and tidy even with other needs like work being met.

OP posts:
Original poster
Ladywinesalot · 26/06/2021 21:17

@JaquelineBean

Which people have show room houses? Are you regularly visiting them? Are other people visiting you?
Yes I visit other houses who are like show houses and mines not.
OP posts:
Nohomemadecandles · 26/06/2021 21:17

What on earth are you talking about? Either clean or don't. It's 2021.

inmyslippers · 26/06/2021 21:18

I visit a house that's a complete grey/white show home. The mums lovely but spends an enormous amount of time cleaning. It's the norm for some working class families. I wish I was that committed to a clean home but I'm stretched very thinly and find it boring

Willwebebuyingnumber11 · 26/06/2021 21:19

My house is very clean and tidy. I was brought up in a very tidy home and I like to know where things are and to be organised.
I find it stressful if things are untidy and I don’t think there’s any excuse for homes to be dirty (not messy, DIRTY)

I only tidy the children’s playroom at the end of the day so it’s not pristine throughout the day but it is before we go to bed.

I have lots of other things in my life and certainly don’t have nothing better to do but having a clean and tidy home is important to me.

JackieTheFart · 26/06/2021 21:19

It’s ‘can’t be arsed’ not asked.

And your way of thinking is completely alien to me. Would I like a tidier home? Yes. Am I prepared to compromise because my leisure time is important to me? Also yes. Do I care what people think about my house? No.

My mum has a show home. She also has two adults in a four bedroom home. I have five in a three bed and three of them are kids.

StevieNix · 26/06/2021 21:20

I hate cleaning but I obviously do it because I have to. I do enjoy my house more when it looks perfect but life is too short for me to be constantly cleaning (which is what it take when you have a 3 year old!)

Original poster
Ladywinesalot · 26/06/2021 21:20

@Nohomemadecandles

What on earth are you talking about? Either clean or don't. It's 2021.
Yes it is 2021, and we have progressed to choice. But there still seems to be an instinct for women to keep clean tidy homes.

Is it hayride or nurture?

I’m starting lung to think nature.

OP posts:
TedMullins · 26/06/2021 21:20

I don’t care what society says women should be like. Why do you care? I prefer my flat when it’s tidy but I like other things more (like seeing friends or taking naps). I left my washing up for 3 days last week and haven’t cleaned the bathroom in 2 weeks. It’s just me living here but I don’t tidy especially for visitors. They come to see me, not assess my cleaning skills

Original poster
Ladywinesalot · 26/06/2021 21:20

Starting to think nature.

OP posts:
SorrySoldOut · 26/06/2021 21:20

my dp does the cleaning, he loves it

my dh before him used to be obsessive over it. my sons are cleaner than me!!

i dont understand?

SorrySoldOut · 26/06/2021 21:21

are you looking for a 'feminist issue' where there isn't one? are you a bit bored tonight?

Original poster
Ladywinesalot · 26/06/2021 21:23

@Willwebebuyingnumber11

My house is very clean and tidy. I was brought up in a very tidy home and I like to know where things are and to be organised. I find it stressful if things are untidy and I don’t think there’s any excuse for homes to be dirty (not messy, DIRTY)

I only tidy the children’s playroom at the end of the day so it’s not pristine throughout the day but it is before we go to bed.

I have lots of other things in my life and certainly don’t have nothing better to do but having a clean and tidy home is important to me.

I’m more like this.

I have to have tidy and organised to function.

But I also have lots going on in life that I’d much rather do.

Hate constantly cleaning but do it because it needs doing.
And also I like it tidy.

OP posts:
Original poster
Ladywinesalot · 26/06/2021 21:25

@SorrySoldOut

are you looking for a 'feminist issue' where there isn't one? are you a bit bored tonight?
Thinking out loud and trying to put my own mind at peace.

Hope that’s ok to discuss on a chat forum?

OP posts: