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Original poster

Obsessive Women Cleaners

91 replies

Ladywinesalot · 26/06/2021 21:05

Ok so this is not about feminism (although it may turn out to be)

I like a clean house, and if I had my way my home would be a perfect show room house allll the time.

However I just can’t be asked for one and also have lots in my life, like working and social life.

So I ask who are these women who have perfect shoes room houses, and why do you?

Are you not busy in other areas if your lives? Do you have nothing else to do?

And no my DH does not clean up nor will he. Should I LTB? Probably but I won’t.

OP posts:
Willwebebuyingnumber11 · 26/06/2021 21:25

I find doing something each day the best way. I certainly couldn’t spend a full day at the weekend cleaning because it would bore me to tears and I would feel I’ve wasted a day.

PartTimeLegend · 26/06/2021 21:26

Time, society, gender roles, nature/nurture.
It's all there...

Let's take those one at a time shall we...?

Time - eh?

Society - Presumably the expectation of society is that being in possession of a penis means that you are incapable of domestic chores.

Gender roles - ah, now we're getting somewhere. The one who wears the dress does the housework, is that it?

Nature/nurture - well I spent my childhood helping my dad in the garden, and polishing the chrome bumper on the family car, and learning how to solder, and I found that all much more interesting than dusting skirting boards and tops of picture frames.

Original poster
Ladywinesalot · 26/06/2021 21:26

@Willwebebuyingnumber11

I find doing something each day the best way. I certainly couldn’t spend a full day at the weekend cleaning because it would bore me to tears and I would feel I’ve wasted a day.
I do a bit each day and still have to have a few hours a weekend!

My family are a mucky lot!!

OP posts:
blacksax · 26/06/2021 21:28

@Ladywinesalot

Starting to think nature.
Starting to think wind-up merchant.
BasinHaircut · 26/06/2021 21:29

With complete honesty, I don’t know anyone who works more than very part time and has any hobbies/a social life who has an overly clean and tidy house.

I have tied myself in knots trying to keep house, and I’ve decided there is more to life. I’ve been trying to decorate my bedroom for 18 months and it’s still not completely finished.

Between DH and I we vacuum the house, clean the bathroom and kitchen once a week - that’s my non-negotiable list. Every now and then we have a blitz when other things get too bad. No one died yet.

Original poster
Ladywinesalot · 26/06/2021 21:29

@PartTimeLegend

Time, society, gender roles, nature/nurture. It's all there...

Let's take those one at a time shall we...?

Time - eh?

Society - Presumably the expectation of society is that being in possession of a penis means that you are incapable of domestic chores.

Gender roles - ah, now we're getting somewhere. The one who wears the dress does the housework, is that it?

Nature/nurture - well I spent my childhood helping my dad in the garden, and polishing the chrome bumper on the family car, and learning how to solder, and I found that all much more interesting than dusting skirting boards and tops of picture frames.

Society - yes no penis means your a housewife

Gender roles - females traditionally do the cooking, child rearing and housework

Nature/nurture - being female doesn’t keN tou can do the mens graft, also who did the house work and cooking majority then?

OP posts:
Original poster
Ladywinesalot · 26/06/2021 21:30

@BasinHaircut

With complete honesty, I don’t know anyone who works more than very part time and has any hobbies/a social life who has an overly clean and tidy house.

I have tied myself in knots trying to keep house, and I’ve decided there is more to life. I’ve been trying to decorate my bedroom for 18 months and it’s still not completely finished.

Between DH and I we vacuum the house, clean the bathroom and kitchen once a week - that’s my non-negotiable list. Every now and then we have a blitz when other things get too bad. No one died yet.

I think that’s more realistic and the key to having a balanced life.

Makes me feel more normal.

OP posts:
Original poster
Ladywinesalot · 26/06/2021 21:31

@blacksax If you please…
Because some that may think different to you clearly is a troll 🙄

OP posts:
EveningOverRooftops · 26/06/2021 21:34

Ime obsessively clean homes mean

They have nothing better to do
They don’t let kids/family do anything
They can afford to be out all the time or go to grannies so house stays clean/leave mess elsewhere.

For most it’s a combo of all 3.

My house is not obsessively clean. I’d like it to be but a SEN kid makes it very hard when I’m exhausted most days.

WorraLiberty · 26/06/2021 21:35

You're definitely having a dig at some other women here and it's not even well hidden OP 🙄

You're making out that basically women who have 'perfect' houses, don't have much going on in their lives outside of that.

But in the same breath you're saying you've married a disrespectful shit, who does not clean up nor will he.

So it's not rocket science is it?

2 equally decent human beings will share the workload - thus leaving time for other things.

BloomingTrees · 26/06/2021 21:39

I don't know anyone with a 'show home' house.
Maybe I move in the wrong circles.

My mum's is very neat and tidy but she's retired and doesn't have young children messing everything up.

DDIJ · 26/06/2021 21:44

This reply has been withdrawn

Message from MNHQ: This post has been withdrawn

idontlikealdi · 26/06/2021 21:44

I have no desire to clean, I pay a cleaner and Dh is much more the one likely to clean. Outsource if you can afford it.

TheRebelle · 26/06/2021 21:56

The only people I know with “show home” clean homes are people who either don’t work full time, or are quite neat, particular and organised in all areas of their lives and will get up earlier to get it done or pay someone else to clean.

I’m none of those things so my house is messy, I don’t mind because it’s my mess.

BringBackThinEyebrows · 26/06/2021 21:59

I stumbled across a load of YouTube videos about cleaning routines, all by women. They spoke so enthusiastically about the products and techniques they use. It made me wonder if there's any men with such passion for cleaning, either creating or following this content online.

RJnomore1 · 26/06/2021 22:05

I’ll be honest that the only people (male and female) with that sort of unrealistic cleaning schedule have had abusive childhoods and mental health issues and it’s been a thing about a mix of control over their surroundings and keenness to distance themselves from their early lives.

Personally I’m quite comfortable being a slattern and getting on with more useful things. I must be lacking - what did you call it? Feminine instincts or something?

What a load of tosh. Cleaning is not hobby ffs.

RJnomore1 · 26/06/2021 22:06

Sorry very important omission in my post: only people I KNOW

MurdockTheMouse · 26/06/2021 22:07

I’m one of those obsessive cleaners. It’s part of my anxiety though and I am trying to cut back. However we don’t have kids so it’s just me and my partner so probably easier. I do work a demanding job though so will sometimes find myself cleaning at 10pm at night. Not good really hence the seeking help for it Grin

WhoDidAndWhy · 26/06/2021 22:12

This thread is boring. Enough with the judgement of yourself and others. Just do you.

blacksax · 26/06/2021 22:13

Life's too short to conform to gender stereotypes.

londonscalling · 26/06/2021 22:14

I've been told my house is like a show home. I don't spend ages doing it.
I just tidy as I go along!

IceLace100 · 26/06/2021 22:15

I think some people clean to relax. So it's their chilled down time type activity.

I have to say I'm a bit jealous ... Grin

PartTimeLegend · 26/06/2021 22:18

@BringBackThinEyebrows

I stumbled across a load of YouTube videos about cleaning routines, all by women. They spoke so enthusiastically about the products and techniques they use. It made me wonder if there's any men with such passion for cleaning, either creating or following this content online.
Perhaps the men all too busy making enthusiastic You Tube videos about cycling, golf, model railways, Star Wars memorabilia, obscure guitar riffs, vintage car spares...
MeanderingGently · 26/06/2021 22:37

I have always had clean and tidy homes; I like to be tidy and organised, it's part of my character and nothing to do with 'feminism' or how I perceive my role in life at all.
It's harder to keep a home 'show home' tidy with a partner and family, especially small children.

However, these days the children are grown up and I live on my own. I love my home and yes, I keep a 'Show home'. It's not that big so it doesn't take me long....and I quite like cleaning. I love to see things all neat and in their place, and everything looking pretty rather than cluttered and messy. It makes me feel relaxed. However, I don't do it for anyone else's benefit except my own, I don't give a shit what anyone else thinks about my place (messy or clean) and I certainly don't get jealous/feel inadequate or whatever when I look at other people's homes. In fact, it never occurs to me to make a comparison.

So if you have problems with how other people keep their homes, I think the problem is with you....or else just stop comparing....

UhtredRagnarson · 26/06/2021 22:45

I’m a cleaner. The immaculate houses I’ve cleaned belonged to:

  1. an elderly, but active pair of ladies, was brand new- and they had a cleaner
  2. a family of 4 adults, house was relatively new, no pets- and they had a cleaner
  3. a couple with no children or pets, was brand new, they only lived in a few of the rooms (it was massive) - and they had a cleaner.