DS1 will be 21 in just over a week.
He's always hard to buy for but this seems impossible. We made more of his 18th so he knows this is a sort of special but not big ticket birthday in terms of presents. It also doesn't seem the birthday where I can buy a few bits (beer/snacks etc) and bung some money in a card.
He has terrible social anxiety and barely leaves the house except to walk round the estate for fresh air or if he comes out for dinner with DH and I.
He's studying computer science but has everything he needs for that and he got new keyboard and mouse etc for Christmas. He has a newish phone.
He's not into clothes or music or sport and has plenty of money to buy himself anything he wants anyway so I don't really want to just give money. There is no point doing balloons and cake if it's just us 3 here and it's not something i think that he'd appreciate. I've asked him what he'd like and he doesn't know.
I came up with a desperation list: toolkit, hip flask, traditional shaving gear, getting a personal trainer (bought him a gym membership but he hasn't really used it when the gym has been open), new glasses, teeth whitening, having his v small group of friends from school that he's met up with three times in the last few years but last time was only a few months ago, round for the afternoon/evening and i'd cater some food and booze and he could have the run of the back of the house. DH and I could drop them back up for the train to the next town where they live/home after.
He looked at the list but didn't go for anything.
I feel so bad when i see what other folk have done for DCs 21st and I've literally organised and bought nothing.