What's the most trivial thing you've been told you're doing "wrong"

[BruceAndNosh]

Apparently not using the entire individual hotel mini tub of marmalade to cover 2 slices of toast is "weird".
I like toast with a SMALL amount of marmalade - this makes me odd it seems

I’ve just been told I know nothing about the expense of carpeting an entire house.
Dh thinks a £1k budget would do 9 large rooms and a hall - floorboards, underlay, carpet and labour.
My eyebrows have left the planet. But apparently my £10k (min) guesstimate is way off.

@Mrsjayy

"Urgh- DH cuts sliced bread sandwiches vertically, so you get two long skinny sandwiches- this is just wrong!*

Oh I fear this a "thing"

You cut bread horizontally? Who do you think you are? What witchcraft is that? All the filling dangling out of the corners like a babies mobile? You're insane. Obviously. And obsessed with crustless hypotenuses.

@Bargebill19

I’ve just been told I know nothing about the expense of carpeting an entire house. Dh thinks a £1k budget would do 9 large rooms and a hall - floorboards, underlay, carpet and labour. My eyebrows have left the planet. But apparently my £10k (min) guesstimate is way off.

Is he living in 1989?🤣

@Blackcat333
Given his recent comments and behaviour I’m leaning towards body snatchers that have only watched 1960s tv….!

Just remembered, horrible MIL (ex)
Said my flowers were wrong and should be one and a half times the size of the vase. 🤬🤬🤬

MIL took nappies off her washing line and repositioned them as apparently I’d done it wrong!
Emptied dishwasher and reloaded as I had done that wrong
Told me she had never seen such a dirty teapot as mine.....
Blah. Blah. Blah. Bless her.......

6yo told me I was driving wrong today.

I have a unisex name one that is slightly more commonly used for men (however an unusual name - I have never met another for example) I have many times been told I can not be MRS as with my name I am obviously a MR.

Apparently, I hold a knife weird (I can cut perfectly fine with it and I don't stab you with it as I do so what's the issue?) Both my parents said this then blamed the other for teaching me (they were divorced)

I don't think in 25 years of marriage dh has ever told me I did anything " wrong" He does load the dishwasher wrong but he knows it as I can fit in like 4-6 more glasses than him so he just stands watching as I rearrange and says nothing ... (he thinks I'm weird I want the knifes in a particular place but hasn't told me I cant do it laughs)

@BackforGood

Not me, but I was shocked to see someone I know open a two finger kit kat and take a bite across both fingers, rather than snapping it into two separate fingers and eating one then the other.

Obviously, I had to clutch my pearls tightly.

I do that , what the hell is so bad ,no sticky fingers .

Everything according to narc mother - the most infuriating was when she told me to put my hair up as it was too curly. We were on holiday by the sea and I was rather admiring how lovely my hair looked.

@thistimelastweek

I don't put the bins out properly. Not quite aligned with the edge of the property of something.

And I am very slapdash about putting stamps on envelopes. I think it's another alignment issue.

I learned just before his sudden death that our bins are supposed to have the handles pointing outwards and the binmen return them with the handles facing inwards, very useful when putting the bins out sadly became my job. He never folded a newspaper to my satisfaction, edges aligned and the centre crease sharp and crisp!

@TatianaBis

Preferring slightly under-ripe pears.

Me too, can't stand juice running down my arm!

I say my mobile number wrong: UK convention is 0XXXX XXX XXX
I say it North American: (0)XXX XXX XXXX. The rhythm works for me. To those who argue I say "Do you want it your way and misremembered or do you want it my way and correct?"

I say my number as 0XX XX XX X XXX.

I say mine as 0XXXX XXXXXX

@Soubriquet

I say mine as 0XXXX XXXXXX

Mine is 0XXX XXX XXX X

I can’t say it any other way. It rather pleasingly ends in a zero so there is a good rhythm building up to a satisfactory conclusion.

@Wowthisisreal

Cutting carrots wrong. A housemate told me I was common/poor because I cut them in a round shape for the dinner I was cooking the group and apparently civilised people cut them into batons.

I still think of it now whenever I serve carrots and like to mix it up between the two styles depending on the meal (how common I am feeling on that day )

My mil said carrots cut into rounds are very common. I like to do them like that every now and again, I wonder if she turns in her grave?

I say my number XX XXX XXX XXX.

@MenaiMna

I say my mobile number wrong: UK convention is 0XXXX XXX XXX I say it North American: (0)XXX XXX XXXX. The rhythm works for me. To those who argue I say "Do you want it your way and misremembered or do you want it my way and correct?"

Many moons ago our landline used to be 4 digits long - say 3456. Then we got the prefix 12. So most people in the village would say 12 3456 or even 12 34 56. One day someone quoted mine to me as 123 456 and I didnt recognise it

I used a knife to butter my toast with butter before a colleague had used it for marg. Apparently it was her knife (in a pile of 3) and she didn't like butter!

I have to ask callers if they want to be called back on their mobile ending XXX, you can almost hear them repeating the whole number in their head to get to the last three digits.

@MenaiMna I say my number the same as you. Not American. Northern UK. No one has ever challenged me, but I am a menopausal woman, so maybe the glint in my eye discourages them

@starfishmummy. I am oldish, but I can remember our home number being something like Levens 769. Happy days

@spongebobjudgeypants I didn't know it was northern UK as I'm originally CDN but seems we share a similar glint in the eye! And I like your name as I enjoy a strong judgement...as I like to say "bring me a horse- and make it a high one!"

Hanging the washing out. Apparently, according to MIL, I should be using one peg for each pair of socks and I shouldn't be hanging pants on the line for the neighbours to see.

I prefer pegging each sock out individually and I'm assuming my neighbours know we wear pants, so...